yo Page 458 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Mike Francesa Wouldn't Shut Up About Paternity Leave Today
Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy is going to be away from the team for a few days on paternity leave, because his wife had a child and he wants to be with his wife and child. This is a thing that men in America, even athletes, do. Usually if they don't, it's because they're not lucky enough to hav...
How Many Times Does Clyde Frazier Say "Dishing and Swishing" Per Game?
From night to night, odds are Clyde Frazier is best thing going during any given Knicks telecast. Swoopin and hoopin may as well run on every graphics package. But is there a method to how Clyde dishes out the Clydeisms? Yes, actually. ...
I Bandwagoned The <i>How I Met Your Mother</i> Finale, Which Sucked
I have a nasty habit of jumping into popular TV shows at the last moment to siphon off a bit of counterfeit emotional payoff without putting in the years and years of tedious buildup. I did this with Lost (not bad!). I did this with Breaking Bad (I REGRET NOTHING). And last night I did it with Ho...
Behold, The "Ya Jeets" License Plate
This was inevitable. As soon as that Derek Jeter groupie gossip that we desperately want to believe hit the internet, we all knew some proud Yankees fan was going to get this license plate....
Rob Gronkowski Wears Glasses, Isn't Fooling Anyone
Rob Gronkowski—a human abnormality whose body is 60% malt beverage—is now wearing glasses, for some reason. You look like Scuba Steve, Gronk. Try a slimmer pair....
Former Expos Announcer Loses His Mind On Melky Cabrera Home Run
My French is a little rusty, but I think former Montreal Expos announcer Rodger Brulotte just sang "I love baseball and this Melky Cabrera guy almost as much as I love sucking down a nice burgundy and five million cigarettes. Good night, it is gone." ...
Best Ever: The Making Of "What Do You Think Of Ted Williams Now?"
This piece originally appeared in the eighth issue of The Classical Magazine. It is reprinted here with permission. ...
<em>Fortune</em> Names Derek Jeter The 11th Greatest Leader In The World
Not the sports world, mind you. The entire world. Derek Jeter, according to Fortune, is a greater leader than Gabby Giffords, and is only two spots behind the Dalai Lama. ...
Spurs Coyote Has Eyes Mangled, Knocked Off
In the most horrifying injury of the NBA season, the Spurs' mascot took a charge from Denver's Aaron Brooks, and came up looking like a flatfish before his eyes fell off altogether....
Researcher Uncovers Rare Film Of The First Game Of Lou Gehrig's Streak
Film of Babe Ruth facing Walter Johnson is enough to get any self-respecting baseball nerd drooling. But this restored 1925 newsreel features something that pushes it into the realm of history: footage of Lou Gehrig during the very first game of his consecutive-games streak....
This Is The Definitive Highlight Of Nick Young's Career
It should be noted that Swaggy P had a great game last night. In 19 minutes off the bench, he scored 20 points on 6-of-10 shooting and grabbed four rebounds. The Lakers also demolished the Knicks last night, scoring 51 points in the third quarter alone. So if there was ever a time for Swaggy to get...
Andy Murray's Mom Loves Trolling Yoko Ono
Via Grantland, a delightful tale of a tennis superstar's mother's sardonic quest for enlightenment. War is over if you want it, but Twitter beef is forever....
Shaka Smart Not Actually Marquette's New Coach, Despite TV Reports
Here's a sampling of Milwaukee newscasts from this evening. They all assert that current VCU head basketball coach Shaka Smart is taking over for Buzz Williams at Marquette. One problem: that's not true. ...
Someone Stole Nick Young's Yeezys
Swaggy P's Sherman Oak's home was burglarized Sunday evening and the crook(s) took close to $100,ooo worth of items, including jewelry and a pair of Nike Air Yeezy 2 sneakers. He was nonplussed. "I'm shocked they tried to get Swaggy." ...
Oh No, Mets
The season hasn't even started yet, and the LOLMets are coming on strong....
Dickgoal Attempt Fails As Péguy Luyindula Ends Up With Nothing But Pain
You can use a lot of body parts to score a goal: your feet, your knees, your head, et cetera. You can also try using your dick, but it's not likely to turn out very well....
Patric Young Baits Pittsburgh Into Vicious Block
Patric Young just slow-played himself into an awesome block. Young let Pitt Guard James Robinson slide past him—watch how he is making an effort to hold his hands down—and once Robinson makes his move to the basket, Young swats the shit out of it from behind. ...
Good Night, Sweet Buttfumble
You were never actually as terrible as you were in the worst times, nor as great as in the good ones. You were a Jets quarterback through and through, but now you are gone. Farewell, Mark Sanchez. You will be...remembered....
Jets Release Mark Sanchez, Sign Michael Vick
On the heels of the news that the fumble of the Buttfumble has been released, the Jets have signed Michael Vick. Adam Schefter says it's one year, $5 million. The timing of the announcements (Friday evening, in the middle of the NCAA tourney), and their quick succession, make you wonder if the Jets ...