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This Gyasi Zardes Lowlight Reel Is Very Rude And Very Funny

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United States forward Gyasi Zardes has quickly established himself as one of Jürgen Klinsmann’s favorite attackers, racking up five goals and 26 caps in his first two years with the national team. He’s a perfectly fine runner and finisher, but good lord, his first touch looks like he’s playing soccer in authentic Swedish wooden clogs.

An enterprising YouTube user cobbled together about three solid minutes of Zardes kicking the ball aimlessly after receiving it, and it’s a wonderfully made video, with the drops in the appropriately grating techno timed to particularly brutal fuckups.

Worst of all, whoever made this didn’t have to draw from a very deep well of games to find enough lowlights to fill an entire video. Zardes and the USMNT have Paraguay on Sunday, and since he’s started the first two Copa America games, odds are he’ll provide some more clunky first touches.


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