To Watch Tonight...

• MLB: St. Louis Cardinals @ Houston Astros. This should be a solid three hours of Clemens worship. 8:00, ESPN. • Movie. The Longest Yard. Ever since the remake came out... I just can't enjoy any movie that doesn't star Nelly. 8:00, ESPN Classic. • NFL: Denver Broncos @ New England Patriots. At halftime, Bill Brasky will breastfeed John Madden. 8:15, NBC.