Trippin' Balls

We have always heard the stories about former Pittsburgh Pirates Dock Ellis and his no-hitter in 1970. If you haven't, the legend has always been that Ellis threw a no-hitter that day while under the influence of LSD. We were never quite sure whether or not to believe it; we saw someone on LSD once, and they didn't look like they could remember their name, let alone make it to the stadium on time and actually pitch. (The dragons kept blocking their path to the door.)

But The Dallas Observer has dug up the still-breathing Dock Ellis, and not only is the story true, it's detailed in vivid, breathtaking fashion. Ellis — who, as the story shows, is much more fascinating a human being than we had known before — tells the whole sordid tale, one that starts by dropping Purple Haze acid on a friend's coach and ends with baseball history.

The hardest part was between innings. He was sure his teammates knew something was up. They had all been acting strange since the game began. Solution: Do not look at teammates. Do not look at scoreboard. Must not make eye contact. His spikes—that's what he concentrated on. Pick up tongue depressor, scrape the mud, repeat. Must. Clean. Spikes.

An absolutely riveting read.

Balls Out [Dallas Observer]