Wake Up, Matt Jones
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Jacksonville Jaguars wide receiver, Matt Jones, just can't seem to get out of his own way. Since last year's bizarre i-was-just-sitting-in-this-truck-and-then-a-pile-of-finely-chopped-cocaine-jumped-in-my-lap-incident, Jones has been very diligent about keeping his proboscis clean — or, at least, being able to pass his random drug screening tests which were part of his probation. Then, last Thursday, Jones was out golfing with a buddy, decided he didn't want to feel like Nerdy NoBoozinstein, and ingested that dreaded probation killer: BEER.
Wouldn't you know it? Next day, it's Matt Jones random controlled substance test time and, since beer is also on the NOT FOR MATT JONES list, he faced two options: 6 weeks of drug counseling, or a few days in jail. Jones chose counseling, but, amazingly, the sensible drug court judge suggested he think about what six weeks away would do to his football career.
The clink it is! And that's where Matt Jones will be until Sunday morning.
Matt Jones Should Not Have Visited The 19th Hole [Friends Of The Program]
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