Upcoming promotions: • Tribute To Bob Night. Thursday, July 31. Toledo Mud Hens (Class AAA International League). Sponge Bob Square Pants is the featured guest, but Bobs of all stripes will be honored. There will be Bob trivia contests, music by Bob Seger, and scenes from the film What About Bob? between innings. • '80s Night With Gary Coleman. Friday, Aug. 1. Madison Mallards (Summer Collegiate Northwoods League). Includes special appearance by former Diff’rent Strokes star Gary Coleman! Plus, free Mallards Slinkies to the first 1,000 fans! • George W. Bush Retirement Party. Monday, Aug, 4. Grand Prairie AirHogs (Independent American Association). This past Saturday, the AirHogs set the Independent League record for the most ceremonial first pitches thrown off the back of motorcycles. I can't see anything topping that. • Medieval Times Night. Monday, Aug. 4. Brooklyn Cyclones (Class A New York-Penn League). I've always said that there isn't enough jousting in baseball. Knights will do battle between innings, and square off in a post-game joust in center field. In addition, King Alfonzo the Conqueror (not to be confused with Edgar Alfonzo the conqueror) will be on hand to throw out a first pitch, greet the commoners, oversee the battles, and knight a deserving giant seagull or two. • Office Olympics. Tuesday, Aug. 5. West Virginia Power (Class A South Atlantic League). The World's Largest Office Party, which last season featured one of the cast members of the NBC series The Office. Still waiting for them to call and fill me in on this year's special guest. • Brett Favre Night. Monday, Aug. 4. Augusta GreenJackets (Class A South Atlantic League). The GreenJackets will give out flip-flops to the first 100 fans, and will retire Favre's jersey in a solemn pregame ceremony (they will then un-retire it the next day). There will also be a Lambeau Leap contest between innings. • Bobblehead Of The Moment. Andrew Johnson. Thursday, July 31, Greeneville Astros (Rookie Appalachian League). The 17th President of the United States, and coincidentally, the first bobblehead in my collection to be impeached.

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Bobbletoy Honorable Mention. Bobbling Wrecking Ball. Saturday, Aug. 2. Brockton Rox (Independent Canadian-American Association). Fans will receive a replica of Yankee Stadium with a mini wrecking ball that moves. Tiny Freddy Sez figurine sold separately. We want your minor league tips! Send game accounts, photos, promotional news or Ricky Martin lyrics to Rick@Deadspin.com. And thanks!