About John Daly's Stabby Wife...

We are 24 hours in to the story of John Daly getting stabbed by his wife with a steak knife (seen to the left, without knife). Details are sketchy and not necessarily either accurate or in this order:

Altercation Thursday night. Fight early morning Friday. Sherrie calls the cops, then flees with the kids. Kids found. Sherrie still at-large. John shows up at the local Memphis golf tournament with nicks on his face you don't get from the Fusion, unless you replace "Gillette" with "Ginsu" and "Kiehl's" with "Krazy-Ass Wife." The facial cuts were from a steak knife. The knife is still missing.

Earlier this morning, I wondered whether the knife came from the wedding registry. Commenter Ghost of Luke Ward said it was a plastic knife from a local BBQ joint. (Germantown Commissary: "Free weapon with purchase of half-rack, slaw and your choice of sides!") I contend that it isn't out of the realm of possibility that GLW and I are both right and that they registered at Germantown Commissary for their wedding cutlery.

Where did things go wrong? Maybe it started with their seven-week courtship before marriage in 2001. Maybe it was foreshadowed by a five-month stay Sherrie had last year in prison. Maybe it was just because shit like this always seems to happen to John Daly.

Whatever it was, writers from "Law and Order" and "CSI" are going to have to duke it out to see who claims this plotline first. Regardless, it looks like Daly is destined to move on to yet another new honey-bunny. Is there an eHarmony question about "stabbiness?" — D.S.

Daly reports knife attack by wife [Memphis Commercial-Appeal] The noble stabbings he must endure [Cake Rocks the Party]