BCS Ups Dosage Of Crazy Pills

To all who believe that yesterday's BCS Holocaust is a firm sign that the NCAA needs a playoff system, then you can just watch the happy little Championship Subdivision and enjoy yourself some playoffs. To me, it's just yet another reason that this maniacal device of power conference destruction we call the Bowl Championship Series shouldn't go anywhere.

If the national title consisted of a playoff system, then an esteemed committee would carefully pick the four best teams, file them into a bracket, and a champion would be whoever won two games. But aw, that's boring. That's how they do it in every other sport. I'd rather argue whether or not Hawaii deserves to play for a national title after a narrow home victory against Washington. In a Utopian postseason, they'd just throw Hawaii into the bracket, and I wouldn't get to engage in useful yet pointless dialogue.

Meanwhile, the bowl system actually benefits the little guys. My boys down in Bowling Green were invited to a bowl game that, granted, nobody but I and about six guys in Tulsa care about. But only something crazy like a bowl system enables the diabolical possibility of Bowling Green winning their final game of the season in anything. "But Sussman, they could still keep all the other minor bowl games for everyone else, and the national champion could still be determined by a reasonable playoff bracket where everyo—" LALALALALALALA CAN'T HEAR YOU.

Look, there's a reason Matthew Broderick chose Global Thermonuclear War over a nice game of chess. Chaos always trumps order in the world of sports. That's why yesterday's losses by Missouri and West Virginia consolidated to form a giant pillar of awesome.