Careful Of The Hairs On the Gatorade Bottle

Supreme Court Justice Clarence Thomas and Secretary of State Condeleeza Rice aren't just the only two black Republicans: They're also the only two black Republicans who want to be NFL Commissioner. Thomas told the Ft. Lauderdale Sun-Sentinel that he would "lo-o-ove to be the NFL commissioner" when Paul Tagliabue steps down. Thomas admitted that he didn't know much about football — which in some sports is hardly a qualification to be commissioner — but figures he's probably too old to play (plus, he doesn't smoke enough weed to play for the Dolphins). Considering Thomas' history of gender relations, we can't wait to see what ideas he'd have for cheerleaders uniforms.

Rice vs. Thomas for NFL Commissioner? (News Max)