Chone Figgins Is Bad At Cheating, Too

Let's start with the good: Chone Figgins was on base! Twice, actually! In a rare start, he went 0-1 with two walks, lowering his average to .185. Look, that's as much "good" as you're going to get. As put by Lookout Landing, who's also responsible for this wonderful gif,

Of course it didn't mean anything. We're so far past the point of wondering whether a good game or a good streak is a sign of revitalization. Figgins drew two walks and they didn't matter and he doesn't matter.

The resignation is thick and understandable. I can't believe we're in the middle of year 3 of the grand Chone Figgins experiment, $35 million over four years for Figgins to first stink up, and then not even be good enough to start for, a pretty terrible Mariners team. Figgins has been consigned to the bench for most of this season and last, and Seattle is still on the hook for another $8M next season, making him the most expensive non-Vernon Wells white elephant in the division.

But you can never say he doesn't make an effort to do the little things. In the seventh inning of yesterday's 4-0 loss to Texas, Figgins tried—and failed—to break up a double play by hauling Ian Kinsler down by the ankles. The Rangers turned two—Figgins can't even cheat properly.

Chone Figgins Now Literally Grabbing At Ankles [Lookout Landing]