Email question: Hi A.J. Happy thanksgiving. All of us in the blogosphere have been anxiously awaiting another installment of "The Date Excretion Chronicles." The golden shower stripper story would be interesting but predictable. We want something with legs. Maybe blowing chunks on Nicole Mansk or swapping chewing gum with Chris McKendry. What's been happening?

RachelRayIsTheDevil

Super question. Sadly, I have failed you. I've been trying to set up a date with Bonnie Bernstein for close to three months, but she has been chilly. We keep getting our lines crossed. (Not our legs, though.) Hopefully, one day Ms. Bernstein will realize just how important it is for ESPN's on-air talent to show the softer, more human side of their personalities if they want to succeed in this industry. Also, Ms. Bernstein claims she's "not much of a drinker." I'll keep that in mind, lest I take her out to some establishment and she wanders off into a bathroom stall with some young fella. Fingers crossed, though. I'll keep trying.