Football Page 1673 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Chris Henry's Scheduling Conflict
The Sports Oasis brings up an excellent point regarding the suspension of Bengals wide receiver Chris Henry: How much money he will lose will depend entirely on when the Bengals' bye week is....
Bill Romanowski Just Can't Quit You
With inflation being what it is, we feel that we have to be very prudent with our entertainment dollar. That's why we will only see new movies with the following fun synopsis:...
Pac Man Jones Will Take A Year Off
This might ultimately be for the betterment of the league, but man, it's gonna make 2007 considerably less fun around here....
Michael Irvin, Assaulting Contractors
We haven't had a good Michael Irvin story in a while, and, frankly, we've missed him. (He's John Rocker's buddy, after all.) Anyway, this is a relatively minor key for him, but we've been so forlorn without him that we're including it, regardless: Irvin has been accused of assaulting a contractor....
Look At All The Dumb Athletes!
Every year, as the NFL Draft approaches, the results of each player's Wunderlic scores inevitably leak out. This appears to serve only one purpose: To allow us to mock athletes for being so stupid. This is, we believe, a perfectly healthy aspect of being a sports fan; we are so cognizant of our phys...
Another Way To Assure Your Child A Life Of Misery
In an example of creative nomenclature that could only have come from Ohio, a couple has named their child "Tressel Hayes Huffines."...
A Slight Departure From Billy Packer
With the NCAA tournament gone, and CBS putting Billy Packer back in his cryogenic chamber for 11 months, I thought we were entitled to some commentators with more of a sense of joy....
Devin Hester Is Virtually Fast
If you're like us — and Lord help you if you are — much of the summer is spent counting down the days until the new version of Madden is released. (This year, the Buzzsaw is gonna be good! Leinart to Boldin ... Buzzsaw!) Even though the NFL Draft still hasn't happened, they've already released some ...
Joe Tiller Has Had It Up To Here With Your HTML
The life of a college football coach is fraught with peril. Boosters are constantly breathing down your neck, players are temperamental and inconsistent and, of course, there's always the possibility that some crazed fellow will end up finding all your cellphone records. But if you're Purdue coach J...
Ever Wonder Who Houston Nutt Talks To? Today's Your Lucky Day!
It hasn't been the best 24-hour stretch for Arkansas football coach Houston Nutt. Turns out, an awfully eager Razorbacks fan sent a request for Nutt's cell phone records through the Freedom Of Information Act and, amazingly, he/she was sent back a full report....
Someone In The Reuters Photo Department Is Having Some Fun
Last week, the Denver Broncos held open auditions for women to join their cheerleading team. Two hundred and fifty women tried out for 34 slots. One of them was this woman....
Everybody Should Have A Nittany Lion At Their Party
Looks like when it's offseason at Penn State, it's pretty tough for the beloved JoePa to keep a firm grip on the ears of his players. Because some Nittany Lions could be in some serious trouble after a weekend altercation....
RIP, Eddie Robinson
Legendary college football coach Eddie Robinson died last night at the age of 88. Robinson was the all-time winningest Division I coach, but he's more famous and beloved for what he did for his players through the years at the traditionally black Louisiana college. (When he was hired in 1941, the sc...
The Sad Aftereffect Of The Chinese NFL Cancellation
As we mentioned yesterday, the schedule NFL game between the Patriots and Seahawks in China has been canceled. That's good news for each team's players and coaches, whom we suspect had little desire to break from training camp and head to freaking China....
Reggie Bush To See Fewer Boobs In 2007
If you've already heard about it you're probably still reeling; as for us, it's going to take some time to get over the news that Reggie Bush has been banned from the Playboy Mansion. Why, you ask? The source says only that the ban was "non-Playmate related."...
There Are Ways To Support Your Brother That Don't Involve Murder
I really wish Demetrius M. Pepper was either less devoted to his brother, or better at stealing cars. Pepper shot and killed a 60-year-old woman, and shot a store clerk, in the process of stealing their cars so he could get to South Carolina's spring game and watch his brother Nathan, a junior Gamec...
Ricky Williams Wants Back In Your Life
The ball is rolling for Ricky Williams to get himself back in the National Football League. His agent, Leigh Steinberg, claims that Ricky's in the best shape of his life (though I don't know if an agent has ever said that a client of his wasn't in the best shape of his life) and has passed all of hi...
Gary Wanted Scooter to Cheat
What we have here is a point-shaving scandal that can in absolutely no way rock the foundation of college sports. Why not, you ask? Well, because it involves the Toledo Rockets, Scooter, Gary, and groceries....
Jim Harbaugh Has Some Breaking News, Dammit!
In case you didn't hear him the first time, new Stanford football coach Jim Harbaugh insists that it's not just wishful thinking on his part that Pete Carroll is about to begin his final season with USC. Harbaugh said it to CBS Sportsline earlier this week, then repeated it to the Los Angeles Times ...
Ironically, Goebbels Actually Liked The Jets
Not a good sign for the New York Giants: Tom Coughlin is beginning to crack under the pressure, and it's not even April. Get those season tickets now, fans! From the New York Daily News:...