NHL Page 533 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The Dallas Stars, the piss in the cereal
The NHL playoffs haven’t had the most amount of drama so far. There’s only been two overtime games in the eight series combined, and not too many more that have been all that close or in doubt in the closing minutes of the third period. Some scores have been blown up by multiple empty-net goals, but...
Florida teams thawing out in first round of the NHL Playoffs
The President’s Trophy winners are in trouble. The resilient regular season champion Florida Panthers have a tough task ahead of them to win their first playoff series in 26 years. They were overmatched Saturday afternoon by the Washington Capitals 6-1, giving the 2018 Stanley Cup Champions a 2-1 ov...
Connor Ingram goes from third string goalie to Nashville’s best bet at an upset
It may have been an impossible task after all. What more could Connor Ingram have done to stop the Colorado Avalanche other than grow a third arm or leg? In his second-ever NHL start, and first in the Stanley Cup Playoffs, Ingram went from Nashville’s No. 3 goaltender to Patrick Roy overnight. He’ll...
Whew, there’s been a lot of bad hockey so far
It’s wonderful as a hockey fan that in this new era of ESPN coverage, playoff games have staggered starts – 7, 7:30, 9:30, and 10 Eastern – so that in this first round, the most exciting round of the playoffs where anything can happen, we can watch as much playoff hockey as possible and not be stuck...
How every team will lose in the 2022 NHL playoffs
As the chase to the Stanley Cup begins, the Eastern and Western Conferences have completely different outlooks. Colorado or Calgary look the part to be the Western Conference champions, and I’m not sure there’s anything the rest of the field of six can do about it. The Eastern Conference is as wide ...
Before the playoffs start, we should take a sec to marvel at what the Blackhawks accomplished
No, that’s not being such a shitfuck organization that they’ve basically gotten themselves erased from NHL history or PR. Watch any of these ads for the Stanley Cup playoffs, and you won’t see one highlight or shot of a Hawk. Even though they won the Cup three times, or were the most popular team fo...
A Knights' fail
BWAHAHAHAHAHA! Look at these dumb fuckers! They’re $10 million over the salary cap and still couldn’t finish in the top three of a division full of fuckwits and bindle-carriers! They couldn’t finish ahead of the Kings! The Kings who are led by Anze Kopitar and Drew Doughty, whose tires are so bald t...
Maybe Jack Eichel just isn’t that guy
If you’re trying to blow your own face off and fall down a sewer for comedic effect instead of securing a playoff spot, you’d have to give the Vegas Golden Knights an Emmy for their performance last night. Needing just about every point they can get to pass the Dallas Stars for the last wildcard spo...
Red Wings Zamboni driver says he was fired for peeing in ice runoff drain
One man’s quick relief unfairly got him relieved from his duties as a zamboni driver for the Detroit Red Wings, he claims. After 51 years cleaning the ice for the Motor City’s professional hockey franchise, Al Sobotka, filed a discrimination lawsuit in Michigan’s Wayne County Circuit Court this week...
What is it, you would say, Donald Fehr does here?
You knew it was trouble as soon as the NHLPA announced it would put out the results of their investigation into the union’s handling of Kyle Beach on a Friday. It’s surprising that organizations haven’t figured out that everyone sees through a Friday newsdump. That suspicion only grew exponentially ...
Enough with Barry Melrose
Dear God, don’t ever let Barry Melrose broadcast another hockey game ever again....
Let’s open up Marshawn Lynch’s portfolio
One of the names you may not have expected to be mentioned as an up-and-coming business tycoon is former Seattle Seahawks running back Marshawn Lynch. For many fans, Lynch is primarily known for his infamous phrase, “I’m here so I won’t get fined.” He wasn’t always the most agreeable player during h...
At least know why you’re voting for Patrice Bergeron for Selke
It’s an unwritten law in the NHL. If Patrice Bergeron is upright, averagely ambulatory, and plays more than 50 games, he’s going to win the Selke Trophy for the league’s best defensive forward. And it’s not easy to argue against this, as Bergeron has been the league’s smartest player for a decade or...
NHL Players Association clears itself of any fault in Chicago sexual assault case
Aren’t those supposedly independent self-investigations just so handy? The NHL Players’ Association released a report Friday (late on a Friday afternoon on a holiday weekend, more specifically) indicating that NHLPA executive director Donald Fehr did nothing wrong in handling reports of sexual assau...
Mike Bossy, scoring star of 1980s Islanders dynasty, dies at 65
Mike Bossy, star of one of the NHL’s greatest dynasties, died Thursday night according to TVA Sports, a French-language network in Canada where Bossy was a hockey analyst....
Evander Kane’s ex contributed to Ryan Hartman’s NHL fine…for fighting with Kane
Sometimes, the best part of sports is the pettiness that we get to witness on a public scale....
Fun police here! You can’t do that Kucherov!
Rules are meant to be broken. That’s the saying, isn’t it? Where there’s a boundary, it must be tested in order to push the limits of the sport you’re playing. That was hockey innovator Roger Neilson’s ideology when he was a professional coach. From 1977 to 2002, Neilson was a menace to NHL official...
Johnny Hockey is on one
Pacific time zone hockey tends to get ignored in the same fashion as west coast baseball. It’s hard to win an MVP or another award when your games are on at 9 and 10pm, as you’re cutting into hockey writers’ drinking time. You have to put on a world-class and ear-shattering whining campaign to get s...
There’s something in the water in NBA and NHL arenas
Rarely does it make sense to link the NBA and the NHL, other than they tend to play in the same buildings at the same time of year. You wouldn’t really call them roommates, because when one is home the other never is. Though that probably makes them perfect roommates, come to think of it. Still, on ...
It was a Hockey Men weekend
The appeal of hockey, to an ever-shrinking insular fanbase that gets more and more shrouded by a new one (though not big enough), is that it’s not the other three sports. There are good reasons for that, we all love our cults. And then there are bad reasons for that, grounded in racism and sexism, h...