NHL Page 565 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Evgeny Kuznetsov Is A Goddamn Wizard
Considering how long the Stanley Cup celebrations over the summer lasted for the Washington Capitals, it’s a feat in its own right that they’re able to play any hockey at all, let alone win a game or two. Evgeny Kuznetsov in particular has shown that he’s shaken off the championship hangover, leadin...
This Is Why The Penguins Kept Phil Kessel<em></em>
The Penguins finally showed some defensive fortitude last night, beating the Golden Knights 4-2 after giving up 11 goals in their first two games. But much more fun than Casey DeSmith’s 35 saves in his season debut were the first three Penguins goals, which came in natural hat trick form courtesy of...
The Jets And Predators Are Brawling
Predators-Jets is the best sort of rivalry: one born almost solely from the fact that both teams are very good and each stands in the other’s way of the Central title, the West, and, perhaps ultimately, a Cup. And even though we’re months and months away from what we all hope is a playoff rematch of...
Connor's Back
Connor McDavid got an assist on each of the Oilers’ goals in their 5-2 season-opening loss to the Devils, but heading into Edmonton’s second game—against the Bruins tonight—it had still been 196 horrible, awful days since hockey’s beautiful young stud had graced us with a goal....
What's Up With The Golden Knights?
The sophomore slump has struck early. The Vegas Golden Knights, a year removed from a miracle inaugural season with a trip to the finals, are 1-3-0, and they aren’t scoring. That’s a problem against any team, but especially when trying to keep up with an offense like the defending champs’....
This Predators Banner Is So Embarrassing
Tuesday was the home opener for the Predators, and they celebrated their 2017–18 season, as they had every reason to; they were good as hell last year, despite falling in the second round to the also-good-as-hell Jets. So they raised some banners. Two of them, perfectly fine banners. One of them, no...
The Flyers' Home Opener Went So Badly, They're Swearing
Now, you pieces of shit know that I can’t abide cursing. There’s no fucking reason for an educated, grown man to resort to swear words. How goddamned bad could the Flyers’ home opener against the Sharks have been to spur not one, but two players to work blue?...Oh! Oh. Jesus fishfisting Christ. Yeah...
Ilya Kovalchuk Is Back And He Doesn't Look Half Bad
The L.A. Kings picked up their first win of this young season by defeating the Red Wings 4-2 on Sunday night. Back-up goalie Jack Campbell deserves plenty of the credit for those two points by holding strong for 36 saves in an emergency start, but perhaps the most encouraging work of the night came ...
The Hurricanes' Victory Celebration Rules
The Carolina Hurricanes, after a long stretch of irrelevance, appear to finally be going in the right direction. They’re a young team with a lot of talent, and though they’re going to be sloppy at times (and their goaltending remains a mess), they should be a ton of fun to watch....
Artemi Panarin Is A Monster, And A Monster Headache For Columbus
Double-shifting in 3-on-3 overtime is dangerous, when every forward has to backcheck on every counterattack, and a tired skater could easily mean an odd-man rush the other way and sudden death. But that’s exactly what Artemi Panarin did for Columbus, staying on the ice for a line change in overtime ...
Let's All Get Irrationally Hyped For Elias Pettersson And The Canucks
The Canucks roasted the Flames on opening night, scoring the first three goals in a fairly easy 5-2 victory. Neither of these mostly irrelevant Canadian teams—the Canucks in particular, with their startling lack of experienced depth players—should do much to challenge the top squads in the West. But...
We're One Game Into The Season And Brad Marchand Is Already Being A Prick
The defending champion Capitals rained righteous hellfire on the Boston Bruins Wednesday night, crushing them 7-0 in front of a celebratory crowd in their season opener. The Bruins are a bunch of ornery bastards when they’re up 7-0, but when Caps center Lars Eller picked up the last of his team’s go...
Capitals Set New Record In Brutal Season-Opening Thrashing Of Boston
The Capitals wasted absolutely no time in getting their Stanley Cup-defending season off on the right foot following a long and Barry Trotz-less banner-hanging ceremony. Just 24 seconds or so into the game—before NBCSN had even had a chance to put the scoreboard chyron on the screen—TJ Oshie ripped ...
Capitals Erase Barry Trotz From Season-Opening Banner-Hanging Ceremony
The Capitals did their big banner raising ceremony before Wednesday night’s season opener. It was very long! It included both a four-and-a-half minute montage set to Mumford & Sons, and a three-and-a-half minute montage set to Queen, and then an excruciatingly slow two-and-a-half minute raising of t...
Tom Wilson Gets 20(!)-Game Suspension For His Hit On Oskar Sundqvist
The NHL has suspended Washington Capitals goon Tom Wilson 20 games for his hit to the head of Blues forward Oskar Sundqvist in a preseason game on Sunday. The suspension for the hit comes down just hours before the Capitals open up their season against the Bruins....
Canucks Ban Video Games On Road Trips, Because <i>Fortnite</i> Is Well On Its Way To Ruining The NHL
The Vancouver Canucks are a young team, so like seemingly all young men, their players are obsessed with Fortnite. They love it. Can’t get enough of it. Flossing and shit when they score goals. (So: rarely.) Locking themselves in their hotel rooms and gaming until the sun comes up, instead of the ti...
Are The NHL's Mini-Dynasties Dead?
Until the Capitals broke through to win their first Cup, the Penguins, Blackhawks, and Kings dominated the NHL as the most effective triumvirate since Roman times. Instead of ending with stabbings and civil war, the modern NHL version collapsed for more mundane reasons involving salary caps and agin...
A 2018–19 NHL Season Preview Of Every Team, From Best To Islanders
Hell yeah, hockey is back! After suffering through three months of sports that do not involve ice, and night after night of 90-degree temperatures with no A/C (though that one might just be me), the most beautiful and fun game in the world has returned to save you from five-hour ALDS games and lopsi...
All You Need Is Spite: A Very Emotional NHL Season Preview
Boys and girls and babes, we all learned so much during the 2017–2018 NHL season. For example, I learned that chaos rules the universe, sports predictions are horoscopes but less accurate, and hockey games are won by pure, defiant, you-said-I-couldn’t-do-it spite and very little else....