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We would like to say "happy trails" to future Hall of Fame receiver Jerry Rice, who retired yesterday after realizing the Broncos actually expected him to run routes, catch passes and occassionally block this season. We salute Rice on his long career, particularly the work he did while hiding in a brothel's bathroom during a police raid. Good luck, Jerry; here's an easy guide to how to spend the first few days of your retirement. Many happy endings to you ...

Jerry Says Goodbye [San Jose Mercury News]
Best Massage Ever [49er Haters]
Denver Massage Parlors [Google Maps]