Locker Page 390 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Children And Sunscreen: A Guide To Summer Hell
Every year I look forward to summer before remembering that summer is, in fact, hell. There are bugs. There is swampass. There are bored children punching each other for sport. And there is suntan lotion. Ohhhhhh, suntan lotion. Oh how I DESPISE you with a concentrated fury. Is there a more necessar...
The Cavs Were Scared Enough Of Steph Curry That They Let Kevin Durant Destroy Them
The Cavs, who have to play perfect basketball to beat the Warriors, did not play perfect basketball last night in Game 1, so they did not beat the Warriors. They turned over the rock 20 times and ceded 27 fast break points, which is not all that shocking given their piss-poor transition defense duri...
After Lying About Using Public Funds For 2015 Golf Trip, New Mexico AD Announces Retirement
New Mexico announced on Friday that athletic director Paul Krebs will retire on June 30, ending his 11-year run as head of Lobos athletics. The reason for his sudden departure is not explicitly stated in the school’s official announcement—the press release is merely an extensive list of accomplishme...
A Guide To Wildwood Boardwalk T-Shirts, Jersey’s Tackiest Export
It’s not a proper summer until I visit Wildwood....
Enes Kanter Says His Father Has Been Arrested By The Turkish Government
The Turkish government’s ongoing antagonization of Thunder big man Enes Kanter has apparently continued this morning, as Kanter declared that his father was arrested by the state. Last week, the government reportedly issued an arrest warrant for Kanter, and two weeks ago he was detained in Romania a...
Maybe Being A Celebrity Isn't Cool
You might think being famous seems like a good time, partly because it is cool to be rich and adored and partly because you get to hang out with other famous people. “Look at that sweet pic of those famous people laughing and having a ball together! I wish I was them!” you think while looking at a s...
I'm Just Here For The Rihanna-Kevin Durant Feud
After waiting roughly 50 weeks for basketball that was both close and meaningful...we did not get that. We got destruction, a 113-91 Warriors win led by Kevin Durant’s 38-8-8. What we did get was the start of a pretty great athlete-celebrity beef, and neither is going to fold as easily as the Cavali...
Warriors Look Disgustingly Unstoppable In Game 1 Blowout Victory
For the better part of a quarter, the Cavaliers and Warriors gave us the gloriously competitive game these playoffs have so been lacking. Then Cleveland suddenly became unable to defend Kevin Durant in any capacity, Golden State looked every bit as unstoppable as they’re supposed to be, and it all w...
Bill Snyder Doubles Down On Evil Refusal To Allow Athlete To Transfer, Mouths Off About Failed Drug Tests<em></em>
Kansas State football coach Bill Snyder has offered a rambling, illogical attempt at a defense for his decision to block sophomore wide receiver Corey Sutton from transferring to another university. Days after claiming that he would “love for” Sutton to stay at Kansas State and was only blocking a t...
How Does Kyrie Irving Do It?
Yeah, the Cavs are barely holding on in a game that’s seeing Cleveland pushed around by the likes of... JaVale McGee? Still, this four-point play by Kyrie Irving is our highlight of the first half....
White Sox Fans To Endure One More Partial Season Of Hawk Harrelson
Ken “Hawk” Harrelson announced yesterday that he has changed his plans to broadcast White Sox games until he dies in the booth and will instead retire following next season....
News Travels Slowly In Baltimore
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Deadspin Up All Night: It's Too Easy
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Drink water....
Kansas State Wide Receiver Calls Out Bill Snyder On His Transfer-Blocking Bullshit
In a series of since-deleted tweets, soon-to-be former Kansas State wide receiver Corey Sutton referred to head coach Bill Snyder as a “slave master,” the result of Snyder’s personal decision to block Sutton’s transfer request, and thus plant a giant financial roadblock in the receiver’s ability to ...
Tonight's NBA Finals Game 1, Simulated In NBA Live '96
We updated the rosters in NBA Live ‘96 on a Sega Genesis to simulate tonight’s NBA Finals game 1 between the Cavaliers and the Warriors. Can Draymond successfully injure someone? Can the Cavs overcome the oddsmakers? We’re LIVE:...
An NBA Finals Preview For People Who Want LeBron To Dunk The Warriors To The Core Of The Earth<em></em>
It’s that time of year again: 364 days and 23 hours since the end of the conference finals, the NBA Finals are here! The brave Cleveland Cavaliers will seek to defend their championship from the vile and heavily favored Golden State Warriors, whom they vanquished in last season’s Finals by coming ba...
A Brain Meme In The Wild<em></em>
At some point in your daily online existence, while either participating in or bearing witness to some argument or controversy, you will, without fail, discover that you have stumbled into a real life brain meme. In a world of reactions, counter-reactions, and counter-counter-reactions—each one serv...
Big Baby Davis To Austin Rivers: "You're A Fucking Bum Who's Been Given The World"
Time to catch up on an amusing, low-grade NBA beef....
Report: Kevin Durant Willing To Take Less Money Because The NBA Is Broken
ESPN is reporting that Kevin Durant, who may well be the most valuable player in the NBA given his age and ability, is thinking about taking a pay cut this offseason in order to allow the Warriors to keep their core together for the next few seasons....
Hell Is Empty And All the Hedge Fund Managers Are At The Bellagio
Blue blazers. Blue checked shirts. Collar open. No tie. Brown shoes. Black shoes. Or Nike shoes. New, new, all new. Soft leather satchels with bold brass zippers. Good cufflinks. Good watches. Better than you know. Hundred dollar haircuts. Straight razored shaves. Shaped cuticles. Manicured nails. C...