Locker Page 437 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Dear The Lakers: Have You Seen These Tweets?
The Los Angeles Lakers just named Magic Johnson their president of basketball operations and fired longtime GM Mitch Kupchak. Co-owner Jim Buss has also been relieved of his decision-making duties, and the team now effectively belongs to Magic. This may work out great for the Lakers! These tweets ar...

The Trade Deadline, In One Act
Setting: The clown-ass internet....

Magic Johnson Tweets His Way Into Job He's Unqualified For
The Los Angeles Lakers named Magic Johnson president of basketball operations this afternoon, fired longtime general manager Mitch Kupchak, and kicked team co-owner Jim Buss back upstairs by relieving him of his EVP of basketball operations title, radically transforming the team’s basketball decisio...

What Happened To Normal People When The Roman Economy Fell Apart?
The sophistication and scale of the Roman economy was a marvel that powered all of its other achievements, from monumental buildings on three continents to its famed and feared professional army. Although it was an agrarian economy focused around agricultural production, it was surprisingly complex,...

NBA Teams Reportedly Want To Trade For Derrick Rose, But Why?
Here are two sets of Derrick Rose numbers....

DeMarcus Cousins Chokes Up At Goodbye Party In Sacramento
By all accounts, DeMarcus Cousins was completely blindsided when the Sacramento Kings traded him to the New Orleans Pelicans late Sunday night (Look at the man’s face when a flak told him that the trade was in motion right after the All-Star game). Based on this video from a going away party some Sa...

Chill With The "Journalists Are Heroes" Thing
Whoa now. Everyone take a deep breath....

Three Officials And They All Blew The Call
Officials whistled WVU’s Elijah Macon for a foul on this play; all three refs were looking directly at the play—in which two Texas players foul each other, and no Mountaineers are to blame for anything—and they still screwed it up. Big 12 officials seem as good at their jobs as Texas’s basketball an...

Jarrett Allen Is Even Putting WVU Bench Players In A Grave<em></em>
Yes, West Virginia is up big at the half over Texas. But spiritually, we don’t see how they ever recover from the devastation of this Jarrett Allen dunk....

Deadspin Up All Night: Oh It Is A Losing Game
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Enjoy the last bit of your holiday....

Kings GM Vlade Divac: "I'm The Dumbest Shithead In The NBA," More Or Less<em></em><em></em>
Sacramento Kings GM Vlade Divac made a blockbuster trade yesterday, shipping superstar center DeMarcus Cousins to the New Orleans Pelicans for a sack of oranges and a Fast & Furious DVD box set. He faced the music and held a press conference this afternoon, during which he revealed that he allowed h...

The Sacramento Kings Deserve All The Failures To Come
Being a Kings fan is an exercise in managing constant, crushing disappointment. Aside from one anomalous stretch in the early 2000s, the team has never been worth a damn, and even then, their high watermark was getting owned in humiliating fashion by the Lakers. Last night’s disastrous DeMarcus Cous...

How To Keep A Healthy Distance From Your Terrible Co-Workers
One look at the way I operate around my co-workers and you’d think I’m anti-social and evil. I don’t talk to these people, I don’t let them talk to me, and I keep all group participation levels to an absolute minimum. Simply put, if I don’t have to interact with them, I don’t. I’m not evil, though. ...

The DeMarcus Cousins Trade May Have Set Us Up For A Spicy Trade Deadline
One of the cool things about a blockbuster trade coming early in the trade deadline period is how its aftershocks set up the rest of the trade window to play out much differently than it was expected to....

24 Questions I Have About <i>The Accountant<em></em></i>
I watched The Accountant on an airplane last week because that’s the kind of movie you watch on an airplane. And even though it effectively bled two hours off the flight, I have many questions:...

Who Else Could Have Made A Play For DeMarcus Cousins?
As you surely know by now, last night the Sacramento Kings traded DeMarcus Cousins (and Omri Casspi) to the New Orleans Pelicans for rookie Buddy Hield, veterans Tyreke Evans and Langston Galloway, a protected 2017 first-round draft choice, and a 2017 second-round pick. Now that we know what type of...

The Game That Brought Jim Bouton Back From Exile
This profile originally appeared in the June 12, 1978 issue of New Times. It is reprinted here with the author’s permission....

The Sidewinder
The forthcoming Lee Morgan documentary will really blow you away. Meanwhile, listen to this. ...

Just What The Hell Were The Kings Thinking?
Let’s accept for a moment that DeMarcus Cousins is the rottenest asshole in the NBA, that the Sacramento Kings were never going to reach anything higher than a seventh or eighth seed with him on the roster, that Cousins was leaving in free agency as soon as he could, and that trading him now was the...

Derrick Lewis After Knocking Out Travis Browne: "I Gotta Do #2...Where's Ronda Rousey's Fine Ass At?"
Derrick Lewis made easy work of Travis Browne at UFC Fight Night, knocking him out in the second round and then launching into a weird post-fight interview in which the heavyweight addressed Browne’s domestic abuse allegations, Browne’s girlfriend Ronda Rousey, and the fact that Browne’s body kicks ...