Locker Page 551 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Consider Using A Bidet
Toilet paper—as a relatively modern American institution, and as a personal means of tidying up in the bathroom—does not hold up under scrutiny....

Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>Jake And The Neverland Pirates</i>
A look at the awful children’s programming you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours. ...

Don't Burn Down The House With Your AC
Those of us not blessed with central air conditioning will be dusting off their AC units and installing them in their windows now that we’re entering true summer. If you’ve managed this feat without mangling a toe or a passerby on the street below, congrats, but there’s something else to consider be...

Darren Collison Arrested On Felony Domestic Violence Charge
Kings point guard Darren Collison was arrested yesterday afternoon in Granite Bay, a Sacramento suburb, after a woman called the police at 1 a.m. Monday morning to report that she was being assaulted....

Deadspin Up All Night: Money Money Money Money ... Money
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Get that paper. ...

Soft Serve Is The Best Thing About Summer
A soft serve swirl in a cone with rainbow sprinkles (not jimmies) might be the world’s most perfect confection on a hot day. Persuasive arguments could make a strong case for chocolate cake or even a really good pudding. However, a soft serve swirl—chocolate and vanilla, in a cone, with rainbow spri...

Report: David Blatt Agrees To New Deal With Obscurity
David Blatt has reportedly taken a job with Turkish basketball club Darüşşafaka Doğuş, which has to be the steepest career drop ever for a coach who was in the NBA Finals one year ago....

How Does A Sneaker Brand Cultivate Cool?
How do you cultivate a “cool” brand when nobody cares about your product? As sneaker brands try to elbow their way into a market dominated by Nike, some suspect the answer is to get people to resell your shoes, even though that doesn’t directly earn the shoe-makers a single cent. You see, this lucra...

Marv Albert Screwed Up A Whole Lot Of Calls In The Western Conference Finals
The worst performance of the Western Conference Finals wasn’t Russell Westbrook’s four turnovers in the final two minutes of Game 6, Shaun Livingston’s disappearing act, or the referees letting Draymond Green get away with murder. No, the worst performance of the Western Conference Finals belonged t...

Guy Who Promised To Eat His Shirt If The Warriors Won Eats His Shirt
Reddit user PARTYxDIRTYDAN was feeling pretty confident about the Oklahoma City Thunder’s chances against the Golden State Warriors. Even after the Warriors came storming back to win Game 6 on Saturday night, our man was feeling strong enough to promise that he’d eat his shirt if the Warriors went o...

Steph Curry Remembered Who He Is, And That Was That
The Western Conference finals generated a lot of conversation about tactics and matchups. Lineups were scrutinized, the length and athleticism of the Thunder were deemed A Problem for the Warriors, and everyone wondered how Steph Curry was supposed to regain his balance amid all those long arms and ...

The Warriors Restored Order To The Universe
Over the last two seasons, the Golden State Warriors gained an air of inevitability. Besides putting up a ridiculous 140-24 regular season record and marching to an NBA championship, it came from the nagging feeling that, no matter how well their opponent was playing, the Warriors would easily rip o...

That's A Spicy Meatball
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Good God, Look At What Dimitri Payet's Done This Time
Reigning king of the free kick Dimitri Payet showed off his craft again today in a friendly against Cameroon, delivering France the victory with this screamer....

30 Years Later, The Accidental Geniuses Of <i>Heavy Metal Parking Lot</i> Reunite
Zebraman did not show....

Smoke Some Fish Like Slavic Grandfather
We have entered the part of the year where it is finally appropriate for everyone to put away winter food—roasts, stews, squash, casseroles—and roll out the grill. It can be frustrating, though, because it’s early enough in the season that a lot of the stuff I like to eat fresh, or cook fast, isn’t ...

The Golden State Warriors Will Win The NBA Finals
Draymond Green is bad. Steph Curry is Chucky Atkins. No matter. Klay Thompson is a blank-eyed three-shooting robot from space and no one will ever stop the Warriors. I’ll die before they lose again. Burn in hell, Oklahoma City Thunder....

Yannick Carrasco Celebrates Champions League Final Equalizer By Making Out With His Girlfriend
Yannick Carrasco brightened up a lackluster UEFA Champions League final by equalizing for Atlético Madrid, then brightened things even more by joining his girlfriend for some passionate celebration....

Umpire Mike DiMuro Forced To Leave Game After Taking Foul Tip In The Face
Mike DiMuro left today’s Red Sox-Blue Jays game and underwent a concussion protocol after a second-inning foul tip drilled the veteran umpire square in the face....
