Locker Page 683 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Taylor Swift Is Seinfeld's Daughter, And The Diplomat NYC Deserves
Across the ’90s, few pieces of music were more ubiquitous than a winding slap-bass jingle composed by studio musician Jonathan Wolff. Every week, tens of millions of Americans heard it open and close Seinfeld, a sitcom so beloved that even its kitschy theme song has become iconic. At the beginning o...

Netflix's <i>Wet Hot American Summer </i>Prequel Will Thrill Fans, At Least
Even in this brave new world of micro-niches and fan service as a legitimate business model, the very existence of Wet Hot American Summer: First Day of Camp is unexpected, somewhat unnecessary, and more than a little odd. But these are exactly the circumstances in which creators David Wain and Mich...

Why Your Team Sucks 2015: St. Louis Rams
Some people are fans of the St. Louis Rams. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the St. Louis Rams. This 2015 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. ...

Laundry School: Death To Rumpled, Wrinkled Clothes
Here we are, friends, at the end of our Laundry School coursework. We covered a ton of ground this month, from explaining the difference between liquid and powder detergents to an overview of washer and dryer settings and cycles. There were posts dedicated to the products you use to get your clothes...

A Norwegian Hero Has Been Shitting In A Golf Club's Holes For A Decade
There are keyboard warriors out there, like myself, who will write all these words about how golf is a classist and racist and sexist and bullshit sport and how actually fuck that it’s not even a sport and how the easiest way to tell if you’re in the presence of a Grade-A, grass-fed fuckboy is to as...

Truly I Say To You Today That Bono Is An Asswipe
At the intersection of all the annoying things a rock star can be—messianic, pretentious, vapid, dumb, old, creatively bankrupt, grandiose, utterly bereft of self-awareness, calcified into a grotesque oily wire-rack-in-the-grocery-store knockoff of himself, part of U2, et cetera—there sits Bono in h...

The First <i>Mission: Impossible </i>Movie Is Very '90s And Very Necessary
There has never been a bad Mission: Impossible movie. They’ve all been ridiculous. They’ve all strained credulity. They’ve all had dense, convoluted plots that don’t really stand up to any scrutiny. They’ve all functionally served as Tom Cruise stunt reels, the plots reduced to incoherent connective...

<i>Kids</i> At 20: A Relentlessly Unpleasant Day In The Life Of '90s NYC
Larry Clark and Harmony Korine’s Kids was released 20 years ago this week, but if you want to have a celebratory home screening of it, you’re going to have a harder time than you might have expected. Once as controversial a cultural property as the soon-to-be-a-Broadway-musical American Psycho was b...

Seth Rollins Helps Jon Stewart Present All His Fake Arby's Slogans
Longtime viewers of The Daily Show with Jon Stewart know that Arby’s is one of the program’s most frequent targets. Tonight’s program featured a supercut of Stewart’s fake endorsements, many of which were for that very fast food chain—and the whole segment features WWE champ Seth Rollins...for some ...

Deadspin Up All Night: I Deserve It
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. July’s almost over....

Rappers On Auto-Balancing Skateboards: A Complete Guide
Here in 2015, most of us are still stuck using our stupid, feeble legs for everyday transportation, but perhaps you’ve noticed the latest rapper trend: auto-balancing skateboards that look like smaller, cooler Segways. Everyone from Wiz Khalifa to Nicki Minaj to Soulja Boy is flaunting these things ...

Mets Blow Game, Mets Grounds Crew Blows Rain Delay
Rain forced a 45-minute delay in Queens today as the Mets were an out away from finishing up a win over San Diego. That delay was lifted just long enough for Jeurys Familia to give up the lead thanks to a three-run Justin Upton homer—which forced a bottom of the ninth. Well, that bottom of the ninth...

The New <i>Mission: Impossible </i>Is Almost Better Than The New <i>Mad Max</i>
1. I think if the Mission: Impossible franchise starred anyone other than Tom Cruise, we’d regard all these movies as classics. All five have been excellent in their own ways, but unlike any other franchise I can think of, each sequel is better than its predecessor. Each has a different director, an...

Awesome Old Dude Andre Miller Should Play In The NBA Forever
As you may have heard, cagey-ass old man Andre Miller has signed with the Minnesota Timberwolves for the 2015-16 NBA season. The Wolves have oft-injured, offensively challenged Ricky Rubio at the point, and down the roster they’ve got scrawny rookie Tyus Jones, and right there between the two of the...

Why Your Team Sucks 2015: New York Giants
Some people are fans of the New York Giants. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the New York Giants. This 2015 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. ...

Deadspin Up All Night: You Could Either Be Successful Or Be Us
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. We appreciate it....

Tom Brady Lied And Killed Babies With His Lies
It’s the day after the NFL’s bombshell revelation—all revelations must be BOMBSHELL—that Tom Brady destroyed his cell phone before NFL investigators could get their hands on it and use it to expose his plots. But he destroyed more than just his cell phone that day, fair reader … HE DESTROYED OUR NAT...

Rich People Are Using Cryotherapy To Freeze Themselves Skinny
If I told you you could stand in a tube of cold air for a few minutes to lose weight and be in the best shape of your life would you do it? Are you a rich dummy? Did you answer “yes” to both of the previous questions? Then allow me to introduce you to cryotherapy, a new sci-fi method of freezing off...

Vin Baker's Training To Manage A Starbucks
Vin Baker had a lengthy career in the NBA, but financially, he has nothing to show for it. Because of alcoholism, bad investments, and friends and family using him, Baker ended up in the gutter with almost no money. The current-day Baker is in better shape; the Providence Journal found him training ...

Why Your Team Sucks 2015: Atlanta Falcons
Some people are fans of the Atlanta Falcons. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Atlanta Falcons. This 2015 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group. ...