Ookie Is No Dummy

Ladies and gentlepeople, we have finally figured out what we will do if we are ever convicted of a felony, other than "try to grow a mustache and move to Turks and Caicos." We're gonna make sure we smoke as much weed as possible, and then get caught.

100 Percent Injury Rate has discovered an odd legal loophole that could actually decrease Ron Mexico's jail time, and it's directly connected to his positive marijuana test.

By taking advantage of an obscure Federal Bureau of Prisons (B.O.P.) Rotational/Developmental Assignment Program (R.D.A.P.) loophole — 18 U.S.C. 3621 — Vick could possibly reduce his sentence by one year. This documented instance of substance abuse apparently qualifies Vick for this reduction upon completion of a treatment program.

The idea? Vick could take part in a substance abuse program that could take time off his sentence and allow him to spend time in a halfway house rather than prison. Proving once again what we already knew: Michael Vick is smarter than everyone.

Mike Vick Smoked Pot To Reduce His Sentence [100 Percent Injury Rate]