Soccer Page 321 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
The U.S. Ran The Most Of Any Team At The World Cup
USA players covered an average of 77.17 miles per match over their four matches at the World Cup. That's more per match than any other nation, which is something to be proud of, right?...
UEFA Emergency Panel: Russian And Ukrainian Teams Can't Play Each Other
Part of the job of being a governing body for international competition is dealing with the occasional geopolitical nightmare, and deciding how to keep teams from two countries essentially at war from turning a game into a battle. UEFA is nipping that shit in the bud right now, before tomorrow's Cha...
FIFA's First Post-World Cup Rankings Are Out
Yes, we all know FIFA's rankings are bad and pointless and the formula is arbitrary and flawed. But if there's one thing we (the human race) can't resist, it's things, ranked....
Say Goodbye To The World Cup With This Gorgeous Animated Highlight Reel
These are still so awesome. Richard Swarbrick has made a few of these animated highlight reels and they are always great bits of eye candy. ...
Germany's World Cup Victory Ceremony Was Really Something
American championship parades may feature unexpected swearing and goofy-ass dancing from time to time, but we really don't have shit on the Germans. When they celebrate a championship, they pull out all the stops....
This Man Should Be Brazil's Next Manager
The Brazilian soccer association has confirmed reports that Brazil's manager, Luiz Felipe Scolari, has resigned. Huge surprise! Luckily, we've come up with the perfect, if unconventional, choice to be his successor....
Guy Doesn't Pay World Cup Pool Entry Fee, Tries To Claim Prize Anyway
There are rules we must all adhere to in order to maintain a functional society. Foremost among them is this: If you enter a fantasy league/pick 'em group/tournament pool, you must pay up before it starts, or at the very least promise to pay at the next available opportunity, or you do not get to cl...
Rihanna Partied With The German National Team Last Night
Rihanna was on the scene in Brazil for last night's final between Germany and Argentina. Because she's Rihanna, she also got to stick around and party with the Germans after their victory....
Maradona Calls Messi's Golden Ball Win A "Marketing Plan"
Lionel Messi was awarded FIFA's Golden Ball, as best player of the World Cup, and it was sort of a cruel selection. Not only did it highlight that the world's undisputed best player became increasingly less visible as the tournament wore on, but it forced Messi to receive his trophy on the pitch, wh...
Hey, Check Out Mario Götze's Boat Boner
Hey, casual soccer fan! You're likely going to remember Mario Götze as the guy who won the 2014 World Cup for Germany, but you should know that he was famous long before he scored last night's deciding goal. That's because he once got a big ol' boner while hanging out on a boat with a lady....
The "FIFA Corruption" Twitter Account Is Fake, Of Course
Shortly after Germany won the World Cup final 1-0, a Twitter account popped up claiming that the match was fixed, and it had some seemingly convincing evidence. Alas, it was a (clever) hoax....
TV Station Interrupts World Cup For Weather Coverage; Viewers Outraged
Viewers in southern New York and northern Pennsylvania missed the ending of today's World Cup final when Elmira ABC affiliate WENY cut away from the action with six minutes left to cover a tornado warning....
Here's How Götze's World Cup-Winning Goal Sounded In Germany & Argentina
Mario Götze found net in the 113th minute to deliver Germany its fourth world cup. Above is the goal as called on German TV broadcaster Das Erste; below is the despondent call from Argentinian TV Pública. ...
Oh, Look, Another Shot To The Head
(Higuain was judged to have been the offender in this foul.)...
Your Germany-Argentina Open Thread
The final match. Talk here....
Irish Comedy Show Pokes Fun At Brazil-Netherlands Match With "Highlight"
Après Match is a comedy show on Irish station RTÉ that mocks various soccer commentators from Ireland and Great Britain. (Here's more of their stuff; it's amusing!) Yesterday, the crew found their "Great Dutch Play" from the third-place World Cup match between Brazil and the Netherlands, and the hig...
Thierry Henry Doesn't Give A Shit That He Just Scored A Goal
Thierry Henry popped in a goal in the 45th minute Saturday to put the New York Red Bulls up 2-1 over the Columbus Crew, but he wasn't in the mood to celebrate....
Match Mercifully Ends; Netherlands Beat Brazil 3-0
We know, lady. We know. This...this was not a good match. The Netherlands took out what little air was in this match almost immediately and then tacked on a meaningless third goal in added time, which we're not even bothering to GIF because, fuck it, this was a game for third place. Good news, Nethe...
Netherlands Take Early 2-0 Lead Over Brazil
For a team whose coach wanted absolutely nothing to do with this glorified exhibition match, the Dutch have come out firing. A streaking Robben earned an early penalty in the second minute when Thiago Silva yanked his shoulder as he galloped toward the goal. Robin van Persie confidently hit the top ...
Every Univision ¡GOOOL! Of The World Cup, Ranked By Length
We've been fans of ESPN's excellent World Cup coverage, but for your money's worth it's tough to beat the live match broadcasts on Univision. Here's every goal scored thus far in the World Cup, stitched together into one very long ¡GOOOOOOOOOL!. Below you'll find a chart ranking every goal of the to...