1 Page 263 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

A Comprehensive List of All the Sports I Should Have Quit Immediately
I spent my formative years in a sports-obsessed southern town surrounded by girls who were good at sports, girls who loved watching sports, and girls who were good at sports and also loved watching sports. Unfortunately, as an anemic and noodle-bodied sloth with zero competitive instincts who was tr...

Balls, Ranked
God has blessed us with so many balls. Here they all are, definitively ranked from worst to best. ...

Here Is Your Ultimate Sports Party Pump-Up Mix to Get You Very Hype
The Jezebel staff is very excited to join you all today, which is a great day for sports—all sports. We love sports!...

Glimmering Polycottons, Knee-Length Shorts & Lightly Flashy Workwear at Thursday's Basketball Games
Amid an endless stream of predictable and boring red carpet style choices during awards season—Jennifer Lawrence in Dior, Charlize Theron in Dior, Julianne Moore in Tom Ford or Calvin Klein, the list goes on—there is a genre of marquee event workwear that Hollywood, with its endless stream of well-p...

Rayo OKC's New 'Kit' Is Altruistic as Hell
The Rayos are the wokest set of sibling teams in the world. ...

15 of Carol Aird's Most Scorching Glances
Everything Carol Aird looks at quickly turns to scorched earth, so scroll through this list of her most flames-inducing glances quickly! If you don’t, the incomparable heat generated by the protagonist of Todd Haynes’s 2015 masterpiece will set your heart—and maybe your entire home—on fire!...

Man Surpasses Other Man
A man made a bunch of dunks Thursday night, surpassing another man who’d previously had the most dunks. That’s gotta burn for that second man, the one being surpassed! Oh yeah. ...

Tennis Player Has the Right Attitude About Tennis: 'It's Just Tennis'
Tennis’s self-styled bad boy Nick Kyrgios, who seems to (like the fun players of the 1980s before him) spend more time delightfully trash-talking his competitors than hustling, had a Great Take on a match Thursday night....

Man, These Chicks Suck at Baseball
Not to be, you know, elitist, but these chicks seem clueless about the fundamentals of baseball....

Manny Pacquiao, Homophobe, Will Shop Where He Pleases!
Manny Pacquiao, a man who hits other men for a living and thinks gays should be put to death, was banned from Los Angeles shopping center The Grove earlier this year. But during a conversation with TMZ, the embodiment of Sara Bareilles’s “Brave” said he’s never stopped going!...

Hockey Fans Cannot Stop Themselves From Throwing Thousands of Plastic Rats on the Ice
It’s an incontrovertible rule of nature that if you give a hockey fan something, they will throw it, as far and violently as possible: beer bottles, pretzel chunks, their own teeth, engagement rings, Lindbergh baby, doesn’t matter. Anyway, somebody gave an arena full of hockey fans some rats....

Good Morning! The Jezebel Staff Is Running Deadspin Today
Hi, I’m the editor of Jezebel. Today, the Jezebel staff will be running Deadspin. ...

Clinton: You're Too Broke For A Candidate Who Represents You
Here is a hell of a tweet:...

The USMNT Are Who We Thought They Were
The United States Men’s National Team beat the pants off of Guatemala 4-0 tonight, avoiding the disaster scenario and setting themselves up to advance to the final round of CONCACAF World Cup Qualifying. But while the victory was comprehensive, there were plenty of worrying signs for the USMNT’s fut...

Did The Media Create Donald Trump? (No.)
So the question of the moment is: Did the media create Donald Trump?...

Carmelo Anthony Wants To Play In The Olympics To Once Again Know What Winning Feels Like
With Chris Paul announcing that he isn’t going to play in the upcoming Rio de Janeiro Olympics, reporters asked his good friend and USA Basketball stalwart Carmelo Anthony about whether he would going to follow suit. Via the New York Daily News:...

The USMNT Better Goddamn Beat Guatemala
The United States Men’s National Team is in danger of failing to qualify for the 2018 World Cup. If it happened, it would be the first time the USMNT missed the world’s greatest sporting event since Mexico in 1986. If they lose to Guatemala Tuesday night, they’ll need an awful lot of help from Saint...

Let's Teach Ted Cruz Some Charisma
Politicians are in the business of persuasion, so it is always miraculous to see one succeed with an egregiously short supply of charm. It’s like the Hanukkah miracle, a menorah burning for eight days on a meager drop of oil; or, it’s like Ted Cruz conning his way onto the short list for our nation’...

Jurgen Klinsmann Blew It
The United States Men’s National Team will probably qualify for the 2018 World Cup in Russia. Yes, they are trailing Guatemala and Trinidad and Tobago in the Group C standings. Yes, they have played conservatively without the defensive ability to make that style work. A day after the U.S. got humili...

What It’s Like To Be Protested
I couldn’t hear what they were saying. I was standing on the steps of Oviatt Library at Cal State Northridge, giving a speech to all the incoming freshmen as part of the university’s formal convocation. (Quick acknowledgment: Yes, this actually happened, so you are now free to dump on me for being a...