a Page 7333 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Your College Football Night Games Open Thread
Nine Top 25 teams play tonight, including a pair of Top 20 matchups....
This Week In Unintentional-Dong Submissions
It was a good week for unintentional-dong submissions. There were more that didn't make the cut than those that did. The limbo-stick has been lowered, and the world's the better place because of it....
A Southern Gentleman Expresses His Feelings Toward BYU With A Single Finger
An estimated 1,000 BYU fans made their way to Mississippi for a college-football game today. BYU vs. Ole Miss, to be precise. And with what do they have to deal? Fingered profanity, that's what....
Weather Forces Evacuation Of Notre Dame Stadium
When the Notre Dame Fighting Irish retreated to the locker room at halftime, they were down 16-0 to Lou Holtz's kid's team. While Coach Brian Kelly was discussing their "performance" in the first half against South Florida, the stadium seating areas were evacuated on account of foul weather....
Usain Bolt Held Back, But Still Made Really Fast People Look Really Slow Again Today
Usain Bolt, that freakishly fast Jamaican guy, ran the fourth fastest 200-meter race in human history at the World Athletic Championships in Daegu, South Korea today. He clocked 19.40 seconds. Only two people have ever run faster. One is named Michael Johnson. The other is named Usain Bolt....
Here's The Memorable Part Of Auburn's Otherwise Forgettable Fourth Quarter Against Utah State Today
The first game in Auburn's Post-Cam Newton Era (also known as the Barrett Trotter Era, according to the game announcers) did not go as expected—unless you expected Auburn to require a last-minute comeback to avoid a 10-point loss to unranked Utah State. Here's the onside kick and the ensuing drive...
UFC Announces First Fight On Fox; "Fair And Balanced" Coverage On Fox Sports Ensues
In August, the UFC revealed that it was teaming up with Fox to broadcast fights. Details were scarce at the time. The UFC usually reveals such details later in media conference calls. And it usually declares such media conference calls in the manner that Crazy Eddie once sold stereos: "UFC PRESIDENT...
Your College Football Afternoon Games Open Thread
Skip Holtz will try to beat the team Daddy Lou used to coach! How awesome is that?! So awesome that it's a network game! Oh, pretty much every Notre Dame game is on NBC, you say? Of course it is. Because that's how it was foretold....
Watch An All-Male Dance Troupe Take The Field At Halftime Of The Saints/Titans Game
When it came to the Saints getting throttled by the Titans in the final preseason game of the year the other night, here's what one guy wrote:...
This Year, You'll Be Able To Get Fresh Ink At Islanders Games
"The Islanders have struck up a partnership with Tattoo Lou's and will be inserting a new shop owned by them into the arena. [Blue Line Station] (H/T Brian B. and Hockey News)...
Fox Sports Apologizes To "The Entire USC Community" For Segment That Singled Out USC's Asian Students
Yesterday, Fox Sports aired a segment that featured Bob Oschack giving USC students a "good, old-fashioned All-American welcome" to Colorado and Utah, the newest members of the Pac-1012. The gimmick: Oshack only interviewed Asian USC students—because in the world of misguided network television humo...
Your College Football Early Games Open Thread
It's the first big college-football Saturday of the season. Yay. No. 18 Ohio State, which lost its The in a haze of Tresselmanic scandal, plays Akron at noon (ESPN). Also at noon on the WWL, No. 23 Auburn hosts Utah State (2) and Northwestern visits Boston College (U)....
On Behalf Of Broncos Fans, The Denver-Area Real Estate Market Exacts Revenge On A Former Coach
"McDaniels just sold his 5,685 sqft Greenwood Village mansion for $1.95 mil ... HORRIBLE for Josh considering he bought the place for $2.5 mil back in 2009 just after he reportedly signed a 4-year, $8 mil contract with the Broncos." [TMZ: Photo H/T BroncosTalk]...
Wonder If This TCU Fan Still Wanted Some Loving After His Team Blew A Gigantic Comeback
Your morning roundup for Sept. 3, the day that Dragon Con's Comic Book Babes Costume Contest becomes an Elvira-hosted reality in Atlanta. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
Fox Sports Does Humiliating Whiteface Routine
This is a Fox Sports segment making a joke about how schools from America's interior West are joining the previously mostly-coastal conference formerly known as the Pac-10. Students on the West Coast are not like students in Colorado and Utah, you see....
This Evening: Ronnie Woo Woo Pays His Cable Bill
Your p.m. roundup for Sept. 2, the day we discovered pizza on the moon. H/T to Ben for the photo. Got any stories or photos for us? Tip your editors....
The New Grantland TV Commercial Is Flirting With You
Honestly, I think they're just fucking with us now. If you're curious, the lady's monologue is a riff from Katie Baker's Grantland debut. [SportsGrid]...
Today In Unfortunate Headline Apostrophe Placement
From the Champaign-Urbana News-Gazette comes this doubletake-inducing headline on the start of football season. I'm sure it looked all nice and informal and innocuous in the sterile InDesign window, but when it actually gets put in a paper? A 48-point poop joke....
Cockblocked By Peruvian Hallucinogenics!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase three heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
We're Sick Of Joe Theismann All Over Again
It's difficult not to pity Redskins fans, who, in addition to being Redskins fans, have to hear Joe Theismann talk about preseason football during preseason television broadcasts. And last night, just after Brandon Banks ended an otherwise splendid punt return by flipping the ball out of his hand ...