a Page 7836 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Tailpipe: "The Padding Of The Console Pressed Against Her Side"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....
Because Winning And Staying Out Of Jail Were Getting Boring In Cincy
Troubled receiver Matt Jones will join the Troubled Bengals, who are also working out troubled corner Pacman Jones. And of course, T.O. rumors persist. Someone tell Mike Brown that "Hard Knocks" won't put the same team on twice. [Cincinnati Enquirer]...
The NCAA Cracks Down On Concussions, Hurt Feelings
Rules Committee proposal time! The two most pressing issues facing college football are, in no particular order, kids risking their health and livelihoods by playing with concussions, and losing teams feeling sad....
Coach K Will Be The Next Guy To Declare He Has No Interest In The Nets
A source tells the Bergen Record: "He's the Nets' first choice. It comes down to if he wants to leave Duke and his comfortable setting and take on a new challenge." Krzyzewski just produced a close approximation of a laugh....
Last Night's Winner: Whatever Passes For Roy Williams's Conscience
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the little man on Roy Williams's shoulder, who prevailed upon the coach to say he's very, very sorry....
Joe Paterno's New Eyewear: Eyes
The 83-year-old Penn State coach had eye surgery which helps him "read his watch" and "not have to wear glasses" anymore but he should, because without them, he looks old and scary. [FightOnState]...
Godwin's Law Strikes The SI Swimsuit Issue
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
PETA Upset By The White Meat Now
PETA is calling out Larry Bird for endorsing McDonalds. Because, apparently, it's 1993....
JuCo Coach Goes After Refs, Gets Cuffed
A coach and one of his players were arrested while confronting referees after a loss. Women's junior college basketball fever: catch it!...
Sepp Blatter Trafficks In Swinging Stereotypes
FIFA's president: "This is a special approach in the Anglo-Saxon countries. If this had happened in let's say Latin countries then I think he would have been applauded." No, in the Latin countries, this would have been mandatory. [Evening Standard]...
Aggravated Assault? Needs More Cowbell
Mississippi State students can rest easy tonight, because police have finally located the man who brutally beat a fellow student at the Egg Bowl with, yes, a cowbell....
Doug Gottlieb, "Touch-Screen Dong" (Touch Screen, 2010)
The ESPN analyst's latest work is a fine addition to the telestrator dong genre. Note the Fauvist coloring and bold gestural abstraction. He has wisely avoided one of dong art's most shopworn clichés, bypassing the pendulous balls entirely....
Man Claims Sportsbook Stiffed Him On Silly Kim Kardashian Prop Bet...Which They Did
A reader placed a tiny wager on what color top Reggie Bush's gilrfriend would wear to the Super Bowl. His choice? Black. It appears, in that photo, to be black. He claims Bodog.com would not pay out. Who will die?...
Binghamton Basketball Was Not A Well-Run Outfit
A $1 million investigation resulting in 102-page report has come to the shocking conclusion that Binghamton—the crime waviest basketball program in D-I—may have lacked "oversight" and "self-inquiry." Also, the Titanic may have lacked "water-tightness." [USAToday/NY Times]...
In Praise Of Team Spicoli
I have a new favorite Olympian, and he is the guy who, when asked yesterday how it feels to be a member of the U.S. snowboarding team, responded with the following bit of bongwater poetry:...
Rey Maualuga Feels Up A Dwarf: A Weekly Roundup From The Tips Forum
We get many fantastic tips in our inbox and from the #tips forum. Some are not so great. These are some of those #tips we specifically overlooked or ignored. All apologies....
Super Bowl Salvation. The Final Jamboroo
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....
Lindsey Vonn Has A Lot Of Nerve Getting Hurt After Being So Sexy
Lindsey Vonn sure is purty, but who does she think she is? Getting everyone all hot and bothered over our Yankee Doodle Dandy and then having the audacity to break her shin before winning any gold medals! What a tease....
Live Chat With Mark Bechtel
Mark's in the comments. Topics for discussion: Daytona, rubbing, smutty NASCAR romance novels, Richard Petty's loopy handwriting, the art of dodging fireballs on the speedway, Cale Yarborough's karate kick, the Swimsuit Issue, and why Mark is in Vegas right now....
Book Excerpts That Don't Suck: <em>He Crashed Me So I Crashed Him Back</em>
Today's selection is from Mark Bechtel's He Crashed Me So I Crashed Him Back, a romp through NASCAR's pivotal 1979 season. Watch the video below, read the excerpt, and chat with Mark at 1 p.m. in a followup post....