a Page 8007 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Cardinals Broadcaster Arrested For Drunken Driving, Smiles Beet-Faced For The Camera
Dan McLaughlin—the primary play-by-play guy for the Cardinals on Fox Sports Midwest—was arrested on Monday for suspicion of drunken driving just outside of St. Louis in Chesterfield and, well, he made a funny face. [St. Louis Today]...
Watch the (Love) Captain of Drunken Hookups in (Literally) Hot Action
Thanks to all who entered and voted in the Drunken Hookup Failure Contest. You have spoken ever so loudly. Our winner is Drew. H., one hot piece of... Here is his tender FAIL re-enacted for your pleasure....
Private Stache: Roger Clemens Gets Intimate With Old Bush, For Once
As keeper of Sports Illustrated's indispensable Vault, Andy Gray spends a lot of his time sifting through the sports photography of another time, when athletes wore short shorts and facial hair, and everyone looked vaguely uncomfortable. Here is one such photo....
Jason Whitlock's Explanation Interview: Live Blog (UPDATE: It's Over)
Whitlock is talking about Kansas City right now. Where is he going to take his talents next? Grab some BBQ and plop down for a few hours....
Florida Man Has Scarred Elderly Couple For Life Because He Keeps Fucking Their Horses
Best line from this fascinating news report via WCTV comes courtesy of Priscilla McDearmid: "I don't even like to have the dog out at night lately because we don't know if that man is standing over there in the corner somewhere watching."...
Nenad Krstic Was Arrested For Throwing That Chair
Following yesterday's basketbrawl at the Acropolis Tournament, Athens police arrested Nenad Krstic for his role in the fight since his chair hit Yannis Bouroussis, leaving Bouroussis with a "bloody wound on the side of his head." Plate-breakingly bizarre updates inside....
Can You Catch A Foul Ball While Carrying Concession Stand Food?
Probably not. We'll second The Fightins' description of this play by a Phillies fan as "the coolest foul ball catch you've ever seen." He should date Sara Saco. [The Fightins]...
Cockblocked by Snow! GREAT MOMENTS IN DRUNKEN HOOKUP FAILURE!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....
Thierry Henry Is Obviously Enjoying Life In New York
This post, written by Richard Gilzene, is republished with permission from The Spoiler. Go there often if you like soccer stuff....
All The News That's Fit To Analogize Ridiculously To Food
Your food metaphor of the day, courtesy The New York Times: "We all know the cliché that a prosecuting attorney can persuade a grand jury to indict a ham sandwich, but Clemens — and Barry Bonds, with his trial scheduled for next March — are not mere ham sandwiches but rather the prime beef of baseba...
"When Their Panties're Moist, We'll Give 'Em The Finale": One Stud's Adventures In Deca And Male Stripping
Paul Solotaroff, the guy with the pecs in the above photo, lived through the age of muscle, which on one notable occasion found our hero shimmying for horny Long Island women, his dick in a Star of David rayon sling....
Violent Bike Collision Has Quick, Polite Resolution
A guy riding his bike with a shoulder-mounted camera hits an old man. Words are exchanged. Disputation seems inevitable. Then both graciously agree on their mutual culpability and move on. Moral: Old people need to watch where the fuck they're going....
Last Night's Winner: Jamie McCourt
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like Jamie McCourt, recent divorcee and current possessor of Frank McCourt's balls in the batshit divorce case that gets batshittier by the day....
LeGarette Blount's Punching Problem
First there was this one. Then there was this one. Now, College Football Talk reveals another time Blount's temper was channeled through his fists. There's a good chance Blount's first career rushing stat in the NFL will be for -15 yards. [PFT/CFT]...
Teenage Poop Vandals Arrested At Ritzy Florida Hotel Pool
Surveillance cameras show one of the teens reaching into his pants, pulling out a turd, then having a poo party with his buddy. It will cost thousands of dollars to undoodie the damage. [ABCNews]...
'Hi, I'm Sidney And I'm Going To Get Tim Tebow Laid'
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...
Say Hello To Grandma Babs, Deadspin
Facebook contest winner Babs Claire has returned from her very special afternoon with Daulerio at Yankee Stadium. Her account, after the jump....
Greeks And Serbs Fight It Out On The Basketball Court, With Their Fists
The Acropolis Tournament in Athens ended today when the Greek and Serbian teams got into a bench-clearing brawl. Come for the punching, stay for the Nenad Krstic chair-throwing. [AP]...
Like Fencing, But With Sex Toys
Because when's the last time you saw someone get knocked out with a 7-pound dildo? [Video via here, music via Star Trek]...
Clemens Fires Back; Are Tweets Under Oath?
The Rocket, responding to his indictment on perjury charges: "I never took HGH or Steroids. And I did not lie to Congress. I look forward to challenging the Governments accusations, and hope people will keep an open mind until trial." [Twitter]...