abl Page 33 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
I-Team: Help Us Solve The Mystery Of Mitch Albom's Ears
Tipster Chad D. (or Chadd?) writes in, [sic]s and all:...
California Minor League Hockey Team Demands Quite A Lot From Those Applying To Be Its Mascot
Inhabiting a mascot's costume can be demanding work. We know that. But who would have guessed that it had so many prerequisites? Tipster Rick alerts us to this ECHL job posting from the Stockton Thunder. They're looking to hire someone to portray Thor, their mascot....
Here's Video Of Mexico Tying The Gold Cup Final At Two All
The U.S. went up 2-0 on a Landon Donovan goal from a Clint Dempsey assist. Mexico's Pablo Barrera countered with one six minutes later, leading to this José Andrés Guardado tally. Halftime score: 2-2....
John McEnroe: Not All Of You Journalists Are Assholes
The classic 1980 Wimbledon Final between John McEnroe and Björn Borg has been dissected more than any match in tennis history. But the friendship that developed between the two, before and since, hasn't been as picked over, in part because Borg, who abruptly left the sport at age 26, has been genera...
The Five Geniuses You Meet In Heaven: Mitch Albom Discovers The Apple Store
After that whole thing about him winning a Red Smith Award that he probably shouldn't have won, Albom's stayed out of the spotlight. Or, wait, no: He's written a play and developed a TNT show. And, somewhere along the way, he found time to visit the Apple Store and write about it....
Here's Video Of A Swedish Table-Tennis Battle Featuring The Elusive No-Look Spin-Shot Winner
What you see here, according to the ping-pong aficionados at Sport Post, is "international table tennis player Mattias Oversjo deliver[ing] an incredible no look spin shot against fellow Swede, Jörgen Persson."...
Sportswriters Struggle With Turns Of Phrase For Franklin Gutierrez's Spastic Pooping
At least Franklin Gutierrez now knows what caused all of his stomach problems for nearly a full year. Gutierrez visited the Mayo Clinic in Minnesota earlier this week, where he was diagnosed with irritable bowel syndrome as the cause of his stomach issues that first popped up last summer....
Why We Can't Tell You Which Soccer Player Had An Affair With This Lady
Because we don't know. (We're pretty sure it's Giggs, but that's not the point.) And we may never know, as a British judge granted an injunction against a newspaper to prevent it from revealing the details of the player's affair with Imogen Thomas....
Four Cans Of Corn Will Get You Two Tickets To A Timberwolves Game
Attention, fans of canned vegetables who will also tolerate watching the Minnesota Timberwolves play a game of basketball: buy four Butter Kernel cans of your choosing for a bargain three dollars (string beans, collard greens, you name it), and you can get two tickets to see the 17-53 Timberwolves i...
They're Still Playing "Friday" At NHL Games, And At Least One Grown Man Is Enjoying It
We know that internet memes generally have a very particular shelf life, and we respect that Rebecca Black's "Friday" phenomenon might have worn out its welcome by now. When we first posted the video to accompany another meme, it had 200,000 views; it now has 61 million views and a dedicated Tumbl...
Sabres Fans Tortured With Rebecca Black's "Friday"
If you haven't seen and laughed at this video yet, I don't think we can be Internet friends anymore. But a meme does not an arena anthem make; that's why it was so curious when our Buffalo correspondent texted to let us know that during last night's game against Carolina, the Sabres played "Friday...
Ronaldo Wore Diapers? Sure, Why Not.
The recently-retired legend wasn't always Fat Ronaldo. Way back in 1999, he was simply struggling-with-his-weight Ronaldo, allegedly taking diet pills that forced him to wear adult diapers during games....
The Weekend In Minor League Hockey Stripteases
Here's Colorado Eagles assistant coach Greg Pankiewicz doing his thing on Friday night. Oh, classic "Hanky" Panks!...
The Blake Griffin Defense: Break His Neck
If there is one proven way to stop rookie All-Star Blake Griffin from scoring, it is to foul the living shit out of him. Of course, Griffin will often score anyway. But if he doesn't, and if he's not paralyzed after the foul, there is only about a 60 percent chance he'll capitalize on the ensuing ...
Mets Excel At Ponzi Schemes, Nothing Else
So what if the New York Mets have finished fourth in the NL East in back-to-back seasons? So what if Oliver Perez and Luis Castillo are due a combined $19 million this year? The Mets are baseball's best at timing Ponzi schemes....
Last Night's Winner: Al Davis, For Still Being Alive
Al Davis is 81, at least in human years. That he's walking and talking and introducing Hue Jackson as head coach is remarkable. Still, you'll thank me for not going with the hi-res versions of these photos....
Niche Sports Romance Goes All Soap Opera
Olympic speed-skater Joey Cheek dumped billionaire heiress Georgina Bloomberg (NYC's mayor's daughter) while she was in the hospital recovering from a show-jumping accident. Concussion, fractured vertebra, broken heart. [NY Post]...
Pablo Sandoval Celebrated Exactly How You'd Think
With a trip to family-style Italian chain restaurant Buca di Beppo and a Colossal Brownie Sundae ("ideal for up to 6"). He promises to be in shape for Spring Training. Heard that before. [Inside Scoop SF]...
This Sorority Gal Did Not Take South Carolina's Loss Well
Bad to worse: first the Gamecocks lost to Kentucky last month. Then she gets a camera shoved in her crying face. Now she's (Internet) famous for it....