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LeBron, Wade, Bosh "Human Centipede" Sign Too Gross For Display Inside United Center
But according to CB Probasco, artist and season ticketholder, the sign was a big hit outside the arena. Suggested headline from Brett, another participant, was "FEED HER! Taj Gibson Certainly Did," but I didn't want to ruin this poster with that haunting imagery. Too late, I guess....

The Photo Of Taj Gibson's Dunk On Dwyane Wade Will Replace Bruce Lee Posters Across America
Via the NBA Photo Twitter feed, we present to you the posterization of Dwyane Wade (click here to see the full view), who is usually the one doing the posterizing. To his credit, Wade has been only complimentary and self-deprecating about the dunk that was seen 'round the American couches and barsto...

"We're On A Fucking Roll, Dude": The 1993 Profile Of Lenny Dykstra That Warned Us What Was Coming
Originally published as "Lips Gets Smacked" in the January 1993 issue of Philadelphia Magazine and later anthologized in The Best American Sports Writing 1994. Reprinted here with the author's permission and his addendum at bottom....

Reggie Bush Encourages You To "Think Before You Tweet"
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: Reggie Bush has learned to think two seconds before tweeting 140 characters....

The Next Stage Of College Baseball Rain Delays Had To Be Medieval Jousting
Choreographed dance sequences could only last so long, so here's the Radford pitcher Mark Peterson taking on High Point catcher Kyle Mahoney in a rain delay joust yesterday. What's the next most likely development? Red Rover? Double Dutch? Russian Roulette?...

Joe Girardi Explains Growing Old Together To Jorge Posada While His Mistress Bats Leadoff
A play, courtesy of the New York Yankees, in six vexing acts:...

Ronaldinho's Website Subjected To Only Known Bin Laden/Jar Jar Binks-Themed Hack Ever
On Friday, Ronaldinho's agent realized that the Flamengo star's personal website had been hacked, and that probably all eight visitors to the site that day had seen the offensive adjustments: Ronaldinho, paired with photos of Jar Jar Binks and Osama bin Laden. The hacker, "TeRoRisTe_Mc," is apparent...

Watch Cristiano Ronaldo Tie The Spanish League Goal Scoring Record
After knocking in these two free kicks against Villarreal yesterday, Ronaldo upped his goal tally to 38 on the season, tying the record set by Athletic Bilbao's Telmo Zarra in 1951 and matched in 1990 by Real Madrid's Mexican striker Hugo Sanchez. Ronaldo also opened up a 14-point lead in the Gold...

This Is The Only Woman In The World Who Knows What It's Like To Get Caught Between Two Tim Tebows In Her Underwear
Your morning roundup for May 16, the day that Hickey got his edits from Lady Gaga. Tebow photo via @Lisa_Altobelli, who has the full shot....

Here's The Taj Gibson Dunk That Inspired Reggie Miller To Quote Martin Luther King On Air
The Bulls beat the Heat by 21 points at home in Game 1 of the Eastern Conference finals this evening. Taj Gibson, who finished with nine points and seven boards off the bench for Chicago, had the two best dunks of the game. The first left Reggie Miller speechless, and presumably on top of Steve Ke...

Here's A Picture Of Cam Newton's Absurdly Detailed Birthday Cake
Sure, Cam Newton was the No. 1 pick of a league that doesn't tangibly exist at present, but that didn't stop Sassy Girl Bakery from going all decadent with his birthday pastry. Wonder what it cost. Wonder who paid....

Evan Longoria Didn't Really Make This Life-Saving Catch
If you're willing to believe this video is real, "Gillette Young Gun" Evan Longoria of the Tampa Bay Rays saved a lady reporter from getting her brains knocked out of her right ear, with four perfectly framed "Gillette" signs in the background. But you don't believe this video is real, do you? Goo...

Watch People Cheer For A Suicidal Turtle At The Players Championship
Your morning roundup for May 15, the day Lazy Cakes, Kush Cakes and Lulla Pies start becoming Public Enemy Nos. 1-3....

Chad Ochocinco Just Got Paid $210K To Get Thrown Off A Bull In 1.5 Seconds (Updated)
Here's video of the football player formerly known as Chad Johnson practicing the art of leaving the chute on the back of a bull. Of course, he's practicing on the back of a horse, and a horse that kind of ambles instead of bucks. That could explain, in part, why he only lasted 1.5 seconds on bull...

A Walk-On Who Made the Team Wants You to Know What It Really Means
Alex Howell was the only freshman in the tunnel that Saturday, his chinstrap so tight it fused his jaw shut, 89,000 people packed into to the last row at Auburn's Jordan-Hare Stadium. Earlier in the week the graduate assistant… [Kotaku] ...

The Grizzlies Were Prince To The Thunder's Morris Day Last Night
Your morning roundup for May 14, the day after a homeless Bulgarian man beheaded an elderly British woman in a Spanish supermarket, walked away "clutching the head by its hair, leaving a trail of blood dripping to the ground," but got caught after an Italian motorcyclist threw a helmet at his face....

Cockblocked In Thailand!
Welcome to Great Moments in Drunken Hookup Failure, where we showcase four heartwarming true stories of drunken love gone horribly awry. Off we go....

Skip Bayless Is Ready To Throw Down With Michael Vick Over LeBron James
Your morning roundup for May 13, the day we wondered why our census form asked for penis size. Video via Sportsfeeder....

Some Texans Wish Michelangelo Chose To Cover David's Junk, If Only For Their Innocent Children
According to this news report on KTXS, several Abilene, Texas residents are rather concerned that "a new man" moved onto their block of Lollypop Trail and plopped a statue of David and his manmeat right on the front lawn. These brave neighbors chose not to complain to the art patrons/villains next...

55 Grey Goose Cocktails For Only $770! An Unscientific Analysis Of The Epic Bar Tab From Tryst In Las Vegas
A few caveats: 1.) This booze session took place in Vegas; 2.) It took place at Tryst, which for those of you fortunate enough to never have been intoxicated therein, can inflict permanent damage to the wallet. That said, this is still an impressive receipt, a full version of which you can view here...