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There's No Good Time To Call A Hockey Player "Hitler," But On Hitler's Birthday Is Especially Poor Timing
Versus announcer Brian Engblom, his mind perhaps on the NBCU re-branding, had an unfortunately slip of the tongue last night, calling Detroit's Jiri Hudler "Hitler." An innocent mistake: Hudler's Sudetenlander name doesn't quite roll off the tongue....

How To Free Yourself Of The Dreaded “Sketchy” Label
I got a letter for our Drunken Hookup Failures last week from a dude named Matt. Now, Matt's hookup fail was fairly boring and didn't make the cut, but there was something at the end of his story that gave me pause, and it was this sentence:...

HOLY SHIT MONSTER JELLYFISH
That's the lion's mane jellyfish, which lives in the ocean and can apparently devour cities whole. I had no fucking idea this existed. COMPLETELY CHANGES THE GAME. I'm never going in the ocean again. Ever. I'm afraid to even take a goddamn bath now, lest this thing ooze out of the pipes and eats my ...

This Might Be The Dirtiest Hockey Play We've Seen In A While
Sabres shit-stirrer Patrick Kaleta is public enemy no. 1 in Philadelphia these days, after drawing Mike Richards into taking an elbowing major. And, of course, this one, where he might have unlocked the door to the bench so Nik Zherdev could be pushed through and taken out of the play....

The Copa Del Rey Trophy Ended Up Lodged Under A Bus Bumper Last Night
As we alluded to earlier, Real Madrid's Sergio Ramos dropped the team's fresh Copa del Rey trophy off the top of a promenading bus in Madrid last night. Just hours after the team earned the title for the first time in 18 years (thanks to Cristiano Ronaldo's header against Barcelona), Ramos let go....

Phil Jackson's Zenergy Lulled At Least One Person To Sleep In L.A. Last Night
Your morning roundup for April 21, the day after McDonald's "National Hiring Day" in Cleveland got real. Real violent. Like, spitting in faces and hitting people with cars violent....

Let's Help Sarah H. Win $10K
When Sarah H. sent this video, she posed the question: "Can you spot the Ukulele?" Then, she readily admitted her "Another Hitachi Day" cover artistry is nothing but an attention grab. If she gets the most hits of all the entries in some sort of contest, she'll win $10,000 from whatever Hitachiday...

Ray Lewis Went To A Small North Carolina College To Talk About Spirits, Thunder, Cards And Whatnot
Tipster Jon R. reports that Ray Lewis "made an impromptu visit to Elon University for their spring football game last week and gave a very powerful speech. ... The game was actually postponed due to thunderstorms." Story moral: God hates people who listen to Ray Lewis giving very powerful speeches...

Here's Video Of The Cristiano Ronaldo Goal That Beat Barcelona Today
Real Madrid won the Copa del Rey over blood rival Barcelona 1-0 on an extra-time goal by pretty boy Cristiano Ronaldo. Great, chippy game settled on a header in the 103rd minute. As it stands, Real now leads the four-pronged El Clasico 1-0-1....

Your NBA Playoffs Open Thread
The Nuggets, Spurs and Lakers try to avoid going down 2-0. The Thunder, Grizzlies and Hornets try to go up 2-0. They'll do so starting at 8, 8:30 and 10:30 p.m. respectively. So exciting....

Your NHL Playoffs Open Thread
There are five games tonight, but only one series might end with a sweep. That would be Detroit playing in Phoenix, but they don't start until 10:30 p.m. eastern. So, check into whether the Washington Capitals and Pittsburgh Penguins can take 3-1 leads over the New York Rangers and Tampa Bay Lightn...

Woody Durham, The Vin Scully Of North Carolina: An Appreciation
One of Tobacco Road basketball's lesser-touted but nonetheless enduring traditions is the hatred at all four schools of television announcing. Raycom or ESPN, Dan Bonner or Mike Patrick, Dick Vitale or, especially, the execrable Billy Packer — depending on your household, they're all either utter...

Bad Beats: Oddsmakers Love The Heat, Because Everyone Else Hates Them
Hello, folks. Welcome back to Bad Beats, the column you visit for betting advice and sad tales of gambling woe. Read past Bad Beats here. Got any stories for us? Email us at [email protected]. Subject: Bad Beats....

Tim Donaghy Has A Theory On Danny Crawford And The Mavericks
Every morning, the fine folks at Sports Radio Interviews sift through the a.m. drive-time chatter to bring you the best interviews with coaches, players, and personalities across the sports landscape. Today: what Donaghy thinks of the refereeing so far in these playoffs. Cubes won't like this one....

Your Barcelona-Real Madrid Segundo Clásico Open Thread
The Spanish Superbowl enters its second stage today in Valencia. This one is for the championship of the Copa del Rey. On Saturday, Real Madrid managed a shorthanded come-from-behind 1-1 draw in a league game. Over the next two weeks, the teams will play twice more to decide a Champions League semif...

What Does The Splinter Group Of Players Mean For The Lockout?
A group about 70 less rich, less famous NFL players are about to hire their own law firm to get them a seat at the bargaining table. What does this mean? Like everything else in tightlipped lockout land, who the fuck knows? But here's our best interpretation....

Your Dreams And Skulls Shall Be Ground Beneath The Treads Of PhillieBot
Last night April 19, 2011, at 8:11pm PDT, the Skynet system went online, at least according to the Terminator franchise. Skynet first becomes self-aware tomorrow, April 21, 2011....

Star Of <i>Fred Claus</i> Points And Laughs At Four-Time NHL All-Star
Your morning roundup for April 20, the day we started buying all of our heroin on Craigslist....

Over At CNN, ESPN's LZ Granderson Takes Aim At American Culture, Whore-Friendly Panties
ESPN.com/ESPN Mag columnist LZ Granderson joined CNN last week, apparently writing a weekly column in addition to his ESPN gig. Why would Granderson need another online platform, one might wonder, especially since his Page 2 pieces often tackle stuff other columnists won't?...

Transgenders On Wheels
Tipster Mike writes in to alert us to the WFTDA's new policy on transgender athletes. Huh?...