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The Unblockable Chase Young Made Wisconsin Look Like Frauds
Here were the things Wisconsin’s offensive linemen could do to stop Ohio State defensive end and elite pass rusher Chase Young in Saturday’s game, his former coach, Urban Meyer, said on the pregame show: They could chip him—have a fullback or tight end sprint into his ribs—with someone like running ...

The Skins Are Horrendous, But At Least They're Quick About It
Here is an item that might actually cheer Skins fans about their cheerless excuse for a football team:...

Victorious LAFC Coach Bob Bradley Storms Off In Response To Softball Question
LAFC beat Zlatan Ibrahimović and LA Galaxy 5–3 in Thursday night’s El Tráfico, beating their rivals for the first time ever, bouncing them from the MLS playoffs, and advancing to the club’s first Western Conference final. LAFC star Carlos Vela figured prominently, scoring a pair of first-half goals ...

Adam Silver Says Issues Between U.S. And China Have "Absolutely Nothing To Do With The NBA"
At the beginning of Inside the NBA on Thursday, Ernie Johnson, Kenny Smith and Charles Barkley sat with commissioner Adam Silver just a couple days after the crew tackled the league’s China debacle for the first time this season. As a quick note for context about this segment’s somber tone and pacin...

Classic Rock, Ranked
Kelsey said she saw the film Yesterday on a plane. I said I didn’t understand why “Eleanor Rigby” was such a popular Beatles song. This being Deadspin, we have, after hours of yelling at each other in Slack, reached the natural endpoint of this, which is a democratically produced staff ranking of cl...

Good Luck Getting Through The Sixers' Forest Of Arms
Sixers rookie Matisse Thybulle had three points, one rebound, and one assist in 22 minutes during his NBA debut Wednesday night, and yet he received a glowing postgame interview on the arena floor after his team beat the Celtics on opening night. Why? Because he threw sand in the gears of his oppone...

Report: Sam Darnold's Toenail Removal Procedure Was "Pretty Gross"
Toenail is the new seeing ghosts is the new spleen is the new mononucleosis. Add to the never-ending list of Sam Darnold’s bizarre ailments a toenail that had to be removed on Tuesday, after the Jets QB’s foot got stepped on during his team’s spooky loss to the Patriots on Monday. Head coach Adam G...

An Interview With The Viral Chinese Stunt Drinker Who Became Our King
One day late last month, Liu Shichao, a 33-year-old farmer in China’s northern Hebei province, awoke to a flood of messages that he had become famous on a foreign social networking platform called Twitter. Liu had never heard of this app; social media giants like Facebook, Instagram and Twitter have...

The Jets Are Being Babies About Sam Darnold's "Seeing Ghosts" Comment
The only bit of entertainment Jets quarterback Sam Darnold provided Monday Night Football viewers this week was when he candidly admitted into a microphone that he was “seeing ghosts” during his four-interception performance against the Patriots. Because no NFL team can ever just let one of their pl...

Playing Against Atlético In Madrid Is Hell
It’s not profound analysis to say Atlético Madrid are good defensively, but Bayer Leverkusen were reminded of the one inexorable truth of soccer in the teams’ Champions League match on Tuesday: playing an away match against the Colchoneros fucking sucks. ...

Adam Gase Is Out Of Excuses
To list all the problems that plagued the Jets last night would be futile and time-consuming. That laugh-track loss to the Patriots, which snuffed out any cautious optimism that might have flowered from last week’s promising win over the Cowboys, speaks for itself. But going forward, the overarching...

If You’re Defending Tom Brady’s Cheap Martyr Routine, You’re Fucking Pathetic
The scene is good. In case you missed it, have a gander below at the now-infamous scene from the new Paul Rudd show Living With Myself where Tom Brady strolls out of a massage parlor:...

What In God's Name Happened To Jordan Tebbutt?
Steve Blake was eager for a game. Fresh off signing a deal with the Trail Blazers in the summer of 2014, the guard stepped onto the court at ClubSport Portland to commemorate his second stint in Rip City. ...

Mikko Rantanen's Leg Did Something Legs Aren't Supposed To Do
It seems only fair to show you this before you’ve had breakfast. So: wanna see something gross?...

Bill Belichick Delights In Tormenting The Hapless Jets
Viewers who hadn’t already slipped into a coma Monday night will have noticed a funny sequence early in the fourth quarter of the Patriots’ blowout victory over a spectacularly inept Jets team. A pair of declined penalties against New England’s punt team produced the ultra-rare scene of Bill Belichi...

Mike Leach, Convinced Of His Own Cleverness, Tells Unbearably Long Joke About Lip Reading
Asked Monday evening whether he’s nervous for next week’s matchup against No. 11 Oregon, where four of his former assistants now work, Mike Leach used the opportunity to take a swipe at football coaches so paranoid about their plays being found out that they cover their mouths while talking on the s...

The First Round Of MLS Playoffs Was Beautiful Chaos
Every single game of MLS’s opening weekend of playoffs was a glorious mess. There were six matchups in the first round, and five of the six ended in one-goal wins; the one exception finished 5–1, but only after one team scored four goals in an extra time that the other team had forced with a stoppag...

The Cowboys Bulldozed The Eagles Off The Field And Now Doug Pederson Has Some Explaining To Do
After a build-up in which head coach Doug Pederson was so confident in his team that he spoke of beating the Cowboys as a when, not if, scenario, the Eagles flew into Dallas and suffered the most humiliating loss of Pederson’s tenure. With the whole country watching them against a division rival, Ph...

Mexican Soccer Game Abandoned After Fans Start Beating The Crap Out Of Each Other
A Liga MX match between Querétaro and Atlético San Luis was abandoned with five minutes remaining on Sunday due to extreme fan violence. As the game neared its conclusion with visiting Querétaro leading 2-0, rival fans in the stadium started brawling....

Wisconsin's First Loss Of The Season Came At The Hands Of...Illinois?
Right, so none of the things that happened were actually supposed to happen. The undefeated No. 6 Badgers were supposed to dismantle 2-4 Illinois. Jonathan Taylor, the best running back in the country, was supposed to front Wisconsin’s first-rate ground game. Illinois, winless against Big Ten oppone...