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How To Rob A Bank, As Told By An Actual Bank Robber
Clay Tumey is a retired bank robber who claims he robbed so many he lost count. He plied his trade about a decade ago, served four years in prison, and is now a free man, out of the game and touting his tale of redemption. He’s doing a Reddit AMA today, and it sort of makes bank robbery sound easy. ...
Ump Jordan Baker Executes MMA Takedown On Matt Kemp
Umpire and weirdo Jordan Baker defused a brewing Padres-Braves brawl with his best attempt at a double underhook throw on San Diego’s Matt Kemp, who was attempting to go after Julio Teheran following a hit by pitch in the first inning today in Atlanta....
No More Bulldog Mascots
Rude opinion: there are too many bulldog mascots....
And This Is Why Deadspin Doesn't Collect IP Address Data
When you use a burner account to comment on Deadspin, we don’t log your IP address, or any other information about your computer. This might seem like an unnecessary precaution for your favorite neighborhood dick joke blog to take—who could possibly care about your comments?—but as our friends over ...
76ers To Wells Fargo: Give Us Money, Or We Won't Use Your Dumb Name
In an interesting bit of corporate jiu jitsu, the Philadelphia 76ers will cease referring to their home arena as the “Wells Fargo Center”—its corporate-sponsored name—reports the Associated Press. Instead, the 76ers will refer to it as “The Center” or their “home arena,” seemingly in retaliation aft...
Deadspin Up All Night: If There's No Music There
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. Catch some sun while it’s out....
The Chargers Will Retire LaDainian Tomlinson's Number
At halftime of San Diego’s Week 14 Sunday night game, LaDainian Tomlinson will be inducted into the team’s hall of fame and become just the fourth Charger to have his jersey retired. I’m sure it’ll be a lovely ceremony, but more importantly, this is a great excuse to watch some highlights of one of ...
Warriors Fan Calls LeBron A "Pussy-Ass Bitch," Quickly Regrets It
If the Cavaliers win in five games, it’s at least partially the fault of this Warriors fan for calling LeBron James a “pussy-ass bitch” after Game 2....
This Is What Happens When A UFC Fighter Kicks A Normal Person
Remember that jamoke who goaded Ronda Rousey into destroying his rib cage? Well, he apparently has a thing for getting wrecked by professional fighters, which I guess is why he asked Fabricio Werdum to kick him in the leg....
This High School Softball Catcher Is The Goddamn Devil
Hey, um, I don’t think you are allowed to do that, evil softball catcher! You definitely aren’t allowed to do that twice!...
Watch John Oliver's Message To Jack Warner That Aired On Trinidad TV
Comedian and Last Week Tonight host John Oliver responded to ex-FIFA official and wanted man Jack Warner’s wild “The Gloves Are Off” paid political program by buying his own airtime on Trinidad television and airing a parody titled “The Mittens Of Disapproval Are On.” We recorded it, and you can wat...
Don't Be A Dick At Concerts
Nothing ruins a concert faster than some rude-ass fellow concertgoers. At a certain point, it’s gotta be legal for you to swat a phone out of someone’s hand who just won’t stop taking pictures at a show. It’s not cool, man. You can’t control the behavior of someone else, but you can make sure you’re...
Deadcast: Does The Bible Foretell A Cavaliers Victory?
Nothing delights me more than when crazy people revisit sacred texts in an attempt to discover ancient prophecies about current NBA games. And a reader recently pointed us to one such sterling example, which is the subject of this week’s Deadcast....
Deadspin Up All Night: I Wanna Say More About American Dreams
Thank you for your continued support of Deadspin. U-S-A! U-S-A!...
Why Not Brew Your Own Beer?
The art of crafting homemade hooch isn’t just for the heroes of country music songs anymore. Ever since 1979—when President Jimmy Carter signed a bill allowing homemade booze for the first time since prohibition (!)—homebrewing has become an American pastime for self-declared connoisseurs of beer. (...
Witness The Death Of A Child's Future In This Walmart Shampoo Aisle
The two videos embedded in this post are called “Beech Grove Walmart fight part 1” and “Beech Grove Walmart fight part 2.” Each video carries the same YouTube description: “2 women and a kid fight at Walmart.” I just want everyone to be clear on what they are getting into here....
P.K. Subban Stops By Street Hockey Game, Punks Little Goalie
Canadiens defenseman P.K. Subban crashed a street hockey game in Montreal Sunday and took a few shots. Overlook the fact that Subban’s wearing sandals with jeans, and instead focus on him playing against an overmatched kid in pads....
Cleancast: I'd Rather Walk Through Fire Than Step On A Lego
My guest this week on the official Ask a Clean Person podcast is Blair Koenig, the writer and humorist behind the blog STFU, Parents and author of the book STFU, Parents: The Jaw-Dropping, Self-Indulgent, and Occasionally Rage-Inducing World of Parent Overshare. She joined me to talk all about paren...
John Oliver Chugs Bud Light Lime To Celebrate Blatter's Resignation
When Last Week Tonight host John Oliver pledged last week to consume a variety of McDonald’s, Budweiser, and Adidas products if those brands made Sepp Blatter go away, nobody imagined he’d have to make good so quickly. But make good he did, last night—though not before describing Bud Light Lime as t...
Justin Rose Bunker Shank Drills Spectator In The Head
Justin Rose was co-leading today’s Memorial at Muirfield Village when, on the 18th, his bunker shot went awry and brained a spectator whose reflexes or attention span weren’t enough to avoid it....