animals Page 7 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Very Good Dog Is Very Bad At Agility Course
This is Olly, a rescue dog, and Olly is very eager to compete in the agility competition at Crufts, the U.K.’s biggest dog show. But eagerness does not always translate to competence....
Golf Highlight Of The Day: Bigass Gator With Bigass Fish
“I don’t wanna get near you. I’m glad you got the fish.” ...
The Bee Plays Soccer
Scientists, in their never-ending quest to replace all fields of human achievement with our new insect overlords, have studied the best way to teach a bee to play soccer....
As Expected, The New Vikings Stadium Is Killing A Record Number Of Birds
No one can say they didn’t see this coming. Well, the birds can....
Taylor Fritz Struggles To Get Moth Off Court; Ball Girl Finds The Solution On The Bottom Of Her Foot
Taylor Fritz’s match against Adrian Mannarino tonight in Acapulco suffered a brief delay as the 112th-ranked American tried to humanely shoo a bothersome moth from the court during a second-set tiebreaker. A nearby ball girl took matters into her own hands...er, feet. Er, foot....
March Mammal Madness Is The Only Bracket You Need
There will be a lot of tournament brackets for random things in the coming weeks, pitting the best of everything from booze to TV shows to, I don’t know, cake or some shit. You can safely ignore all those brackets. This is the only one that matters: A 67-animal bracket that pits mammals* against eac...
Far Left Peddles Grossly Sexual Giraffe Pornography Online
Though Americans may have our political differences, we can all agree that children should not be subjected to grotesque displays of nudism and sexual organs. Correction: we cannot all agree on this, judging by the latest uproar found on the internet. ...
Good Dog Joins Bike Race, Smokes The Competition
There’s not much I can give in the way of context for this video. The excited announcer is commentating in Italian, but that doesn’t necessarily mean the race was in Italy. There are no races worth filming happening in Italy right now, and also it’s winter, so this grainy footage is probably old. ...
The Sports Highlight Of The Day Is These Four Girls Vs. A Rat
I promise you that you will see no greater display of strategy or teamwork, and no stronger joy of victory, than these girls getting a rat out of their upstairs bathroom:...
Dog Sucks
No offense to Al, because all that’s available to issue a draft grade on his dog is this video, but those ball-collecting skills are a major red flag....
Harlem's One-Antlered Deer Dies Of Pointless, Endless Political Feud
Today, a white-tailed, one-antlered deer that delighted crowds of Harlem residents for weeks died of stress and fear because the governor of New York is in a perpetual juvenile pissing match with the mayor of New York City....
May This Philadelphia Opossum Bring You Holiday Cheer
This is Gary. Say hi to Gary. Merry Christmas Gary, you trashcat (his words, not mine, although I’d use the same words)....
Kind And Gentle Aussie Goalkeeper Rescues Seagull That Took A Ball To The Face
Born to a sun-scorched land whose cruelly blistering climes have weeded out all but the most terrifying and murderous critters (and, somehow, koalas), it makes sense that Australians would be better equipped than most to interact with the rare friendly creature that crosses their paths with respect,...
Can You Identify These Animals?
The Gardner Police Department needs your help. The Kansas town set up a bunch of wildlife cameras in a park to try and get footage of a mountain lion. Instead, they got this....
Deer Lowers The Boom On Cross Country Runner
A herd of deer interrupted Saturday’s NCAA Division III Mideast Regional, and one of the animals slammed into a runner. They’re sick of our cars and roads, and now they’re taking us out on their turf....
Repent, For The Mongoose Horde Is Nigh
Stay away from open windows. Lock your doors. The mongoose legion approaches. There will be no survivors....
Cucked Penguin's Insane Revenge Fight Is The Horror Movie Of The Year<em></em>
The good people at National Geographic host a program called “Animal Fight Night.” Reader, it is exactly what you’d expect. ...
Ryan Lochte Is Bad At Math Or Has A Magic Dog
Swimmer/tree stump Ryan Lochte is very, very good at one thing, and very, very bad at knowing how old his dog is....
Animal Watch: Have Animals Escaped Our Control?
You can scarcely turn on the news these days without being confronted by the troubling question: What are animals doing now? ...