as Page 2339 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Sure Beats The Kiss Cam
Unfortunately, the video above doesn't have the actual moment, though if anyone happened to catch it, we're all ears. Our favorite part, as pointed out by AA, is that the woman lists herself as a "sea captain." In Tennessee. Which is awesome....

About Last Night
What you missed while preparing for the Global Orgasm For Peace ... • NFL: Willie Parker will be able to use the handicapped parking space at Steelers practice all next week. Pittsburgh 41, St. Louis 24. • College football: Navy and Utah pound each other like the Monitor and the Merrimack until one ...

No More Illini For Us For A While
We're not going to any more Illini sporting events; we're gonna need something to cheer us up....

The Yearly Night In The Champaign Snow
We arrived in the new generation coal plant capital of the world late last night — the mayor of Mattoon, charmingly, used to coach us in baseball — so our holiday season has already begun. And we kick it off with our yearly trip to Champaign for some Illini basketball....

Michael Vick Does Not Approve
We haven't quite wrapped our minds around this alleged news that Jonathan Papelbon's dog at the clinching ball from the World Series last year. We're not sure we believe it....

Pity The Poor Jayhawks Reporter
Is Mark Mangino leaving Kansas to become the new coach at West Virginia? Well, no, obviously. Who would think that? Unfortunately for him, Lawrence Journal-World reporter Ryan Wood, who became the victim of one of them thar hoaxes....

Curt Schilling Isn't Sure His Thoughts On The Mitchell Report, But He Knows He Has Them
We had no sooner told you about the past rock stylings of Curt Schilling when he decided to unleash an epic rant about the Mitchell Report....

T.O. To Romo: Girls Are Icky
I've thought about it and decided that it all had to be a nightmare. All I remember are fleeting images: Jessica Simpson. Pink jersey. Multiple sacks of Tony Romo. Terrell Owens asking for Simpson's phone number. Press conference. Yoko Ono. Jerry Jones' face melting like the Nazi in Raiders of the L...

Knicks End Up Not Being Worth Protesting
So the Knicks fans had that "Fire Isiah" rally yesterday afternoon — inconveniently right before the Knicks' most impressive win of the season — and the outrage in New York was palpable. And by "palpable," we mean, "about two dozen people showed up despite it taking place in one of the most highly f...

About Last Night
What you missed while voting for the Quote of the Year ... • NFL: Parcells hired by Miami as head of football operations. Clever Dolphins/Big Tuna headline in the works, will be ready by end of the day today. • NBA: Road trip! Boston loses at home for first time, to Pistons. Congressional hearing pl...

Curt Schilling Used To Rock Much Harder Than He Does Now
You might see Curt Schilling as a blowhard, but trust us, he used to be cool. How do we know? Boston Magazine has a copy of a minor league program from 1986 reveals Schilling's rocking soul....

Who's Sorry Now? Herm Edwards Edition
Kansas City Chiefs head coach Herm Edwards, we salute you. Not only did you basically tell your fans to go #### themselves after they complained about the Chiefs' losing record, but then you were forced to sloppily apologize; essentially humbling yourself before fat guys who wear bags over their hea...

Sadly, This Still Won't Get You A Date With A Supermodel
If you're like me, you're constantly wondering "what would Kige Ramsey's name be if he were a Brazilian soccer star?" Well, wonder no more: Answer: "Kigildo." Isiah Thomas is also fun to put in there ("Fire Thomisco!"), as is Mike Golic. Golito! It's all thanks to Brazilname, the online name genera...

LoDuca Will Dodge Your Questions, And Cars
While we're on the steroid beat, DC Sports Bog has a pretty amazing snippet of a Paul LoDuca conversation from the day before the Mitchell Report came out. When in danger, or threatened, just make sure to almost be hit by a car....

Roger Clemens' Uphill Battle
We really haven't learned anything new about Roger Clemens this week. We might have some specifics about what everyone's been whispering about for years, but it's no shocker. And we also were reminded that Roger Clemens, more than anything else, chokes in the clutch....

The New York Knicks Will Not Tolerate Your Taunts
If you're a major sports franchise that's trying to survive rough times, you do anything you can to keep the fans on your side ... winning hearts and minds is almost as important as winning games. So that's why, naturally, the New York Knicks on Monday ejected a fan for holding up a "Fire Isiah' sig...

About Last Night
What you missed while visiting the baby otter ... • College basketball: Yes, it appears that Jayhawks Magic will extend through to at least February. Kansas 71, Georgie Tech 66. • NBA: I'm convinced that future generations will regard Sasha Vujacic as the greatest Laker of them all. LA 103, Chicago ...

This T-Shirt Will Inject You With Something
A reader sends in this T-shirt he had signed about 20 years ago. It features signatures from Jose Canseco, Mo Vaughn and Roger Clemens, all three of which were prominently featured in the Mitchell Report last week....

SHOTY Elite Eight: Ron Mexico Vs. Isiah Thomas
In the first round, No. 1 seed Ron Mexico/Michael Vick/Ookie was more wobbly than we might have suspected. He could be ripe for an Elite Eight upset....

Elijah Dukes Might Have Some Lady Issues
Just in time for the SHOTY Quarterfinals, our old pal Elijah Dukes is at it again. The guy just can't help himself; his fingers just tap threatening text messages as if they have a mind of their own....