aw Page 435 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Miami University Had The Pukiest, Poopiest, Sexiest Spring Formal Ever
On April 9, 2010, Miami University's Pi Beta Phi fraternity for women held a spring formal at the quaint Lake Lyndsay Lodge in Hamilton, Ohio. The sloppy, slutty details of what transpired that boozy enchanted evening are tremendous....

LT's Weight Loss Spokesman Replacement Has A Little Less Star Power
Lawrence Taylor is accused of doing some Very Bad Things. That means he's not allowed to tell us how he lost 35 pounds (results not typical) on Nutrisystem. Now pinch hitting: Matt Stairs....

Lawrence Taylor's Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day
Since this morning, the age on LT's alleged prostitute has been bumped from 15 to 16, and he's no longer accused of beating her (her pimp is). Do these revelations make things better? No, they do not....

Perfect Gentlemen: My Lovely Night With Lawrence Taylor
This is a new series called "Perfect Gentlemen," wherein we feature stories from women (or men!) who've gone out on dates with professional athletes and had altogether positive experiences. Unfortunately, today's installment features Lawrence Taylor....

This Lawrence Taylor Story Is Going To Get Real Ugly, Real Fast
Taylor is charged with beating and raping a 16-year-old girl overnight. He's currently in jail, awaiting his arraignment. A press conference is scheduled for this afternoon. [AnimalNY]...

Lawrence Taylor... Accused Of Rape
"Taylor, 51, was taken into custody by the Town of Ramapo police after being accused of raping someone in the Holiday Inn Holidome Hotel in Suffern."[CBS]...

By Virtue, Not By Force: Are The White Boys Of Lacrosse Predestined To Be Dicks?
Or, in its original form, our question was, "Are lacrosse guys more prone to assholery than other sports?" sent to our gal Katie Bakes around 11 p.m. last night, since she's the closest thing we have to an expert on the sport....

Real Deer Burst Into Wisconsin Bar During Bucks Game, Prove Unworthy Of Anyone's Fear
Shortly after the start of the Bucks' eventual Game 7 loss to the Atlanta Hawks, two genuine Wisconsin deer burst through the glass doors of the Stout Ale House restaurant in Menomonie, where patrons were watching the game. Video inside....

You Are There: Catching A Home Run Ball
If you're like me, you've never caught a ball (fair or foul), but always wondered what it felt like. Well, this amazing video is probably the closest we're going to get....

A Brief History Of The Greatest Twitter Hashtag Of All-Time
Sometimes, I wonder what we did in those dark years without the Internet and, more recently, without Twitter. Friday was one of those days, as I sifted through a Twitter search for a hashtag dubbed "WireDerbyHorseNames." Warning: Omar's coming, yo....

Today In Wacky Reportage: How To Slightly Annoy Hockey Players
Whenever the Blackhawks score a goal at home, the Fratellis' "Chelsea Dagger" blares over the loudspeakers. A plucky reporter played it to several Canucks in an attempt either to psych them out or to recreate a moment from a terrible ABC sitcom. ...

Blackhawk Duncan Keith Doesn't Appreciate You Prying Into His Finances
This video, taken during Game 4 of the Chicago-Nashville series, shows a Predators fan/heckler getting under the skin of defenseman Duncan Keith. Keith's Norris Trophy-nominated response? A refreshing Gatorade spritz. Points for accuracy immediately deducted for being a ninny. [ChicagoNow]...

Bobby V Comes Out Of The Closet As Someone Who Doesn't Quite Understand The Closet Metaphor
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day...

Matt Millen Apologizes
Matt Millen Apologizes To The Polacks [Tirico Suave]...

Matt Millen Apologizes For Calling Ron Jaworski A "Polack"
In cased you missed it, yesterday Millen was on-air discussing fried bologna sandwiches with Buffalo native Ron Jaworski and said "ask any Polack from Buffalo how they like them, right Jaws?"...

Lawrence Taylor Doesn't Recall Much From His Draft Day
Which he blames on the 41 beers he says he drank (in fairness, they were Coors Lights). I wonder what he's drunk on in this video?:...

"The Homo Quota"—Inside The World Of Gay Softball
Earlier we wrote about three bisexual men suing the Gay World Series for excluding them because they "weren't gay enough." Let's examine the lengths organizers will go to to keep the sport gay, and how teams get around the rules....

LaShawn Merritt Was Trying To Get Bigger, In One Of Two Ways
The Olympic gold medalist failed a doping test, because, he says, he took a "male enhancement" product. We don't really believe that, as a giant cock would wreck a runner's wind resistance, and make a mess of the baton handoff....

Update: ABC Lawyers Are Freaking Out Because <em>Lost</em> Call Sheet Has "Elements Of Truth"
Well that's unfortunate. I guess this call sheet a reader sent us actually contains spoilers or something. [Gawker]...

Microsoft Is Pretty Much Running Seattle Sports
It's not just the WNBA team that's a walking advertisement for Microsoft. The Sounders, Seahawks, and even Pete Carroll's draft strategy are all being brought to you by Bill Gates' brainchild....