aw Page 438 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
How One Energy Company Will Prevent Catastrophic Oil Spills: Swivel-Chair Safety
What you are about to read sums up everything that's boneheaded about corporate America — and it all begins with a swivel chair. Read, weep, and learn....
Last Night's Winner: The Team That Won The Stanley Cup, Duh
In sports, everyone is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like the Chicago Blackhawks and Rocky Wirtz, who needed just three years to undo what Dollar Bill Wirtz spent 40 years screwing up....
Golden Tate's Dramatic 911 Donut Call: "They're Drunk And Being Retarded"
Listen in as an exasperated donut maker asks police to save her from two buffoons who stole her donuts and her keys. Also: an NFL wideout with "average" build who is "maybe 5'9"? Maybe he needs more than donuts....
Chicago Blackhawks Win The Stanley Cup
It's over. Patrick Kane wins it for the Blackhawks with a "secret" goal in OT. Good for him. (Update: Now with bonus video of Jeremy Roenick's tears.) [NHL.com]...
Last Call For Hockey? (a.k.a., The Cup Is In The Building)
Wait, a second....sports on NBC....on a school night? My stars! Let's hope it's not the last time. Unless you're a Blackhawks fans, in which, I don't care for your kind. (Why do I say things like?! So rude.)...
Brooke Hundley Sues ESPN
You knew it was coming: Hundley's wrongful termination suit claims ESPN leaked info to the press, and fired her even though Steve Phillips was the one pursuing her. This may not end prettily, but at least it will happen publicly. [PRNewsChannel]...
Now The Stanley Cup Finals Is For Serious
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Golden Tate Breaks Into Donut Shop Due To Maple Bar Addiction
Police were called to Top Pot Doughnuts in Bellevue, Washington, at 3:00 a.m. on Saturday after two men were found entering the store after hours. Turns out new Seahawk Golden Tate just had a case of the munchies....
An Alternate History Of The Miami Sorority Zoo Party Bus Of Doom
Earlier this week, we told you about the Zeta Tau Alpha sorority that was disciplined by Miami University for alleged drunken assaults on a limousine driver. Well, a friend of the Zetas have stepped up to defend their honor....
Oh, Good. Philadelphia Is Back
Vice-President Joe Biden takes in Game 4 of the Stanley Cup Finals, along with a plastic mold of what appears to be his own head, as Philadelphia claws its way back to a 2-2 series tie. Never surrender....
The Human Dramedy Of The National Spelling Bee
Whether by design or accident, the kids at this year's spelling bee were decidedly less wacky than last year's crop of home-schooled rascals. (I do like the Canadian, though.) However, the event was not without its chuckles or....stunning twists!...
Minor Leaguer Incites Bench-Clearing Brawl In Middle Of Home Run Trot
The website that tracks the slowest HR trots may have found a new record that might never be broken. It is definitely much harder to finish your stroll around the bases when you're being attacked by the other team....
The Most Intellectual Of Intellectual Property Disputes
The organizers of a chess tournament are suing a website for reporting the results of the matches, live. I think it's too much to ask people to wait for SportsCenter to report the results that night. [ChessVibes]...
The World Cup Of Also-Ran "Nations"
Want to play in the World Cup, but the international community won't recognize your country as an independent nation? Enter the Viva World Cup, starring such luminaries as Kurdistan, Greenland, and the Kingdom of the Two Sicilies. [WSJ]...
Blackhawk Fans Do Not Handle Rejection Well
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and internets to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....
Don't Be Afraid To Talk About Hockey
Will the Flyers make this a series or humbly submit to the overwhelming power of Antti Niemi? Would you rather see Philly humiliated or Chicago twisting in the wind? A tough call, but try to focus on the hockey. [AP]...
Win By Five, Lose The Game, Says Absurd Youth Soccer Rule
Old hotness: lead by five goals, game is called via slaughter (or "mercy") rule. New hotness: lead by five goals, other team automatically wins. The pussification of youth sports continues apace....
Yet Another Miami Sorority Formal Ends In Drunken, Pukey Anarchy
The Fightin' Zeta Tau Alphas of Miami University became the third sorority at the Ohio school to be placed on probation this semester after a night of messy, over-served lunacy. At the zoo, of all places. Those poor animals....
Chicago Monument Desecration Continues Unabated
A 2-0 lead in the Stanley Cup Finals has made the Blackhawks fans/statue vandals in Chicago drunk with power. They've moved on from a statue of a beloved sports icon to a statue of...something by Pablo Picasso. H/T Nick....
Last Night's Winner: Philadelphia Flailers
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the Chicago Blackhawks, who seriously got under Philly's skin, as evidenced by Dan Carcillo launching himself at anything that moves, and Chris Pronger literally throwing in the towel....