aw Page 442 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Stay Away From Atlanta This Weekend
In addition to the Hawks' playoff game, downtown Atlanta will play host to two separate "Freaknik" festivals, something called the Sweetwater 420 Fest, a tango convention, and a robotics competition. Hijinks are sure to ensue. [AJC]...
Another Jayhawk Goes Pro — This One, Without Any College Experience
A Kansas law school student, not so confident about his job prospects, declares for the NBA Draft, thinking his chances will be better there. Well, they'll be better than Wayne Simien's, anyway. [Kansas Law Free Press]...
Last Night's Winner: Steeler Pride
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the good of people of Pittsburgh, who don't stand for miscreants, rabble rousers, or hippies. Plus, their heroes very rarely get charged with crimes....
Today In "Holy Crap, This Guy Is Buying An NBA Team": Prokhorov Does Business With A Dictator
New Jersey legislator Bill Pascrell Jr. is calling for an inquiry that into the sale of the Nets because prospective owner Mikhail Prokhorov may or may not have done business with reigning Dictator of the Year, Zimbabwe's Robert Mugabe. Of course....
People At Marlins Games Still Punching Each Other In The Vicinity Of Video Cameras
While lacking the sweep and drama of last year's brawl, this Paul Greengrass-ian fight from Saturday's Dodgers-Marlins game had the virtue of being sparked by inebriated legume tossers. Topic: Hasn't the use of Steam's classic jam become stale? H/T David....
Implosion Destructo-Porn: Texas Stadium Edition
Preceded by fireworks (and onlookers paying an admission fee), the 39-year-old Texas Stadium was reduced to rubble this morning. Jerry Jones is a secular Shiva: destroying, in order to re-create....
USA Swimming's Monstrous Coaches And The "Culture of Sexual Misconduct"
An investigative report on last night's 20/20 presented startling stories of young swimmers sexually abused, secretly videotaped, and even impregnated by monstrous coaches. Has USA Swimming created a unique "culture of sexual misconduct," as ABC News would have you believe?...
Baseball's New Lady Knuckleballer is Just Another 18-Year Old Girl Partying in Mexico
Two sentences from this article on US minor-league baseball's newest acquisition, Eri Yoshida: "She taught herself how to throw a knuckleball from watching a video of Tim Wakefield" and "The Outlaws open their season at Tijuana on May 21." [MLB.com]...
A Softball Diamond Is Probably Not What She Had In Mind
A Cincinnati-area softball coach proposed to the coach of his rival team before their game Wednesday. Somehow, I don't think their players will be following suit (not in Ohio, anyway). [Enquirer]...
Villanova Pregnancy Hoax Email Results In Confusion, Death Threats
Yesterday, in an attempt to debunk the Fisher-Reynolds pregnancy melodrama rumor that spread via email for the past couple weeks, it appears I became the Big East's Furman Bisher instead. To clarify: It's a hoax. Like this. And this....
The Masters Invaded By Airborne Pranksters Asking Tiger Woods About "Bootyism"
Augusta National's authoritarian fussbudgets do not yet hold dominion over the skies, as proved by whoever hired this plane to circle above The Masters today. Also, it's $1 wing night at Déjà Vu. [Video via ESPN, surprisingly.]...
Did Tiki Barber Sleep In His Girlfriend's Dorm Room? (And Other Important Questions)
The New York Post did some more homework on Tiki Barber and his 23-year-old lady friend by interviewing everyone who has ever known, lived with or served the duo pasta. The question now is who you choose to believe?...
The Deadspin Field Guide To Tiki's And Tiger's Barely Legal Liaisons
Two superstars, both caught with (much) younger women. This looks bad, but it's possible for Tiki Barber and Tiger Woods to minimize the damage. We offer some helpful dos and don'ts for everyone on how to conduct their Nabokovian affairs....
Nike Unveils Weird New Tiger Ad, Starring Zombie Earl Woods
Nothing moves athletic apparel like bringing a dead man back to life to talk solemnly about his son's wandering schlong. [YouTube]...
Villanova, Syracuse, And The Case Of The Impregnated Girlfriends (UPDATE)
Since Villanova was unceremoniously bounced from the NCAA tournament on March 21 by St. Mary's, many emails have been fired off by frustrated alumni explaining how this happened to their precious team. The reason? Corey Fisher impregnated Scottie Reynolds's girlfriend, of course....
Tiger's New Lady, Raychel Coudriet, In Photos. Maybe.
According to this website, these may be photos of Tiger's latest young lassie to come forward. Also, The Post has fun texts from Tiger to her: "Are you touching yourself? I want to fuck you."...
Tiki Barber Pulls A Tom Brady On His Pregnant Wife
Famous people don't just get divorced. They have scandals. Like Tiki Barber who is leaving his wife—who is eight months pregnant (with twins)—for a blonde intern half her age. Now that's a breakup....
When You Lose The Ball In The Sun, Who Can You Sue?
You can't sue the sun itself, and Amun-Ra has no standing in court. So a 53-year-old slow-pitch softball player who got busted in the face is suing the owner of the diamond....
The Steve Phillips Redemption Timeline
AOL Fanhouse hired Steve Philips as their new baseball analyst, just 161 days after the world learned he had an affair with an ESPN underling. Is that some kind of record for morphing from sexual disgrace to professional respectability?...
More On The Santonio Holmes' Lawsuit: Lies, Damned Lies and Face Rubs
According to several conflicting reports about the incident that led to a lawsuit against Santonio Holmes, the Steeler won't face criminal charges, but only because he intimidated the victim by letting her rub his face?...