aw Page 491 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
NHL Stanley Cup Pants Party: Sabres Vs. Senators
And here, you thought we were completely ignoring the NHL playoffs. To remind you: Canuck please!...
When Baseball Players Act Like They Want To Fight
In the wake of Roger Clemens' "Look at ME!" announcement yesterday, the fact that the Yankees and Mariners had a pseudo "lemme at 'em!" brawl was entirely lost. (Same thing with the Brewers-Prince Fielder skirmish.) But nothing beats a bench-clearing tussle, mainly because rarely are punches actuall...
Meet Hawaii's Stank Football Team
Colt Brennan, quarterback at the University of Hawaii, considered giving up his senior season at Hawaii in favor of the NFL Draft. But he opted to return, because he wants three things: a conference championship for the Warriors, a shot at the Heisman, and some goddamn soap....
ESPN Trots Out The Barbaro Crazies Again
We have enjoyed, in this week of Barbaro remembrance, the new focus on the kind, not-at-all-unbalanced souls who worship at the altar of the great lost champion, the ones we've been following with somewhat concerned fascination over the last year. Without fail, every reporter who talks to the Dee Mi...
Keyshawn's Final Moments As A Panther
If you want to relieve the sublime comedy of Keyshawn Johnson's "excitement" after learning that the Carolina Panthers drafted his "buddy" Dwayne Jarrett — thus securing his release from the team — the video above has the complete footage. It was funny at the time, but it improves considerably knowi...
If He's Half As Crazy As Joey Porter, The Steelers Drafted Well
With the 15th pick in the NFL Draft, the Pittsburgh Steelers select Lawrence Timmons, LB, Florida State. Mike Tanier of Football Outsiders tells you all about it....
Willis McGahee Is Easily Replaced
With the 12th pick of the NFL Draft, the Buffalo Bills select Marshawn Lynch, RB, Cal. Mike Tanier of Football Outsiders tells you all about it....
Lawrence Phillips Goes For Rare Triple Crown
An old George Carlin comedy routine had a good time mocking California's "Three Strikes And You're Out" policy of jailing three-time felons for life; Carlin pointed out that the writing of laws for the incarceration of our citizens should perhaps not be based in cute and funny baseball terms. But as...
Gene Upshaw Would Rather You Not Read Anyway
As anyone with even a fundamental understanding of professional sports labor issues knows, the NFL has the weakest players union. NFL players have the shortest careers, make the least money, suffer the harshest long term health effects and rarely have guaranteed contracts. This has caused many — and...
What? The NBA Can Discipline Officials? Really?
Man, when you offend Tim Duncan, you offend the whole NBA....
Cultural Oddsmaker: Who's the Next Minor League Mascot to Get All Dirty?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....
Your Long National Nightmare Is Over
Over the weekend, Pro Football Talk reported that everybody's favorite mathematician Joe Theismann was likely out as Monday Night Football "analyst," with his likely replacement being the infinitely superior Ron Jaworski. Today, The New York Times gets in on the act, confirming it with ESPN sources....
But Who Will Exchange Witty Banter With Jim Belushi?
You may have seen the last of Joe "Norman Einstein" Theismann in the Monday Night Football booth. Pro Football Talk is reporting that Theismann is out, and will be replaced by the great Ron Jaworski....
The Kansas/UCLA Open Thread
Kansas vs. UCLA will be tipping any time now. Hopefully, that one will make this one look like the JV game. There's no shortage of history and tradition there, of course, as will be mentioned during the obligatory shot of Bill Walton in the stands with his tiny Asian wife....
Sweet 16 Pants Party: Kansas Vs. Southern Illinois
Kansas Jayhawks (32-4) vs. Southern Illinois Salukis (29-6) When: 7:10 p.m. ET Where: San Jose...
Introducing Tony Dungy's Least Favorite Sports Mascot
If the March Gayness blog pool at the Malcontent needs a costumed mascot, well, Flamy is available at very reasonable rates. Come to think of it, if he has the time, he could also be a fine representative of Manny Ramirez's grill-hawking efforts, or the next phallic-shaped object for golf's Christie...
By The Time You Read This, Steve Alford May Already Be A Lobo
So to recap, Bobby Knight now in Lubbock, Steve Alford in Albuquerque. We all new that Knight was "going to the hot place," one day, but Alford? ESPN is reporting (and we know how that can turn out) that Alford is leaving Iowa and will become New Mexico's new head basketball coach, possibly by Frida...
Iowa Stifles Online Dissent (Almost)
So here's a clever idea: To make sure that no enterprising and surly fan starts a campaign to take down the head coach at your program, the University of Iowa has bought the rights to FireKirkFerentz.com....
NCAA Pants Party: Kentucky Vs. Villanova
Kentucky Wildcats (21-11) vs. Villanova Wildcats (22-10 When: Friday Where: Chicago...
NCAA Pants Party: Kansas Vs. Niagara
Kansas Jayhawks (30-4) vs. Niagara Purple Eagles (23-11) When: Friday, 7: 10 p.m. Where: Chicago...