blue Page 57 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Jo-Jo Reyes Can't Win
We don't know if Jo-Jo Reyes was watching Wilson Valdez celebrate an unlikely W after six seasons as a non-pitcher, and we don't know if he's reading about it right now. We do know that if we were in his position, it would make us want to throw a goddamn chair through the window....

When They Came For Argentine Soccer Fans With Hoses, The Fans Fought Back With Umbrellas
Despite uploader daniel1512020's admission that this video from Sunday's Huracan vs. Estudiante match is "horrible el audio," what's important is el visual. It seems as if rioting prompted officials to call the game after 32 minutes with Estudiante winning the Primera Division game 2-0. This is a ...

MLB Won't Let Us Show You Travis Snider Breaking His Bat Over His Knee, So Here's A Fucking Drawing I Did Instead
Travis Snider struck out with the bases loaded in the sixth against the Yankees yesterday and Bo Jacksoned his bat in two. It was pretty cool, especially considering that Snider went on to win the game with a two-out double in the 10th. As you know, we can't show you the video, lest we step on MLB's...

Dookie’s Obnoxious “Open Letter” To Kyrie Irving As Obnoxious As You’d Expect
Last night's NCAA title game was horrible to watch, so thank goodness Chris Cusack of the Duke Chronicle, who was apparently born with a bronzed asshole, is sending the 2011 college basketball season out on a high note by writing this very hateable open letter to Kyrie Irving....

Invisible Line Helps Oregon Win A Sub-NIT Championship
The Oregon Ducks won the College Basketball Invitational tournament (presented by Zebra Pen) last night. The CBI's "history page" goes all the way back to 2008 and notes how VCU won it last year....

Short White Guy Wins College Dunk Contest
So ends the ballad of short white guy. Jacob Tucker captured our hearts, with his average height and above-average ability to jump and slam a basketball through a rim. And these were legitimately good dunks — no affirmative action here. But if you're wondering why such an athlete would be stuck in...

Coach K, Please Shut Up (Also: Jalen Rose Arrested For DUI)
We do some Duke-hating around these parts. And maybe a hair too much of it, if you ask no one. I mean, hey, Duke lost to VCU in 2007 in the first round, before it was cool....

Let Us Rejoice In Duke's Misery
The Duke University men's basketball team has earned a special privilege in college sports and within March Madness: It will never be considered the underdog. As far as we're concerned, for as long as Coach K is patrolling the sideline and as long as his hair stays a surreal jet-black, Duke will ...

If You Didn't Know Derrick Williams Before, You Do Now
"He just gives you a presence all the time, that kid. He looks like he never gets tired. He is unique. He's a very unusual player to guard. He's a great player. A great kid. I told him afterward he is special .... He gives you confidence. You always know you have that guy on the court. There is a ph...

Duke Alums Are Worried About Craziness Of The Young Cameron Crazies
There is a crisis in Durham. Dennis and Elizabeth Chen, '02 and '00 Duke grads and presumably husband and wife, wrote a letter to the Duke Chronicle proposing a Crazie-off challenge to the university's current student body. At the Michigan game on Sunday, the letter alleges, the Crazies practiced th...

ESPN, Jalen Rose, And The Manufactured "Uncle Tom" Controversy
Big ratings last weekend for ESPN's Fab Five film: Bill Simmons says it was the highest rated ESPN doc ever....

The Fab Five Are Still Shit-Talking Christian Laettner
Did everyone watch "Fab Five" last night? If you're like us, you were most excited by the teaser of Jimmy King calling Christian Laettner a "bitch." Turns out he wasn't the only one with choice words for the face of that era's Duke team....

Short White Guy Is On His Way To The College Dunk Contest
Jacob Tucker's strategy of putting his dunk reel on YouTube has paid off, with two million views and the attention of the NCAA. But the 5'11" Tucker ("probably 5'10½"," he says) will need to take down one more small-school dunker to get into the contest....

This Game-Winning Chris Stewart Goal Made An Announcer Say "Holy Jumpin'!"
Chris Stewart's second goal of the night lifted the St. Louis Blues over Columbus in overtime last night, 4-3. It was Stewart's ninth goal in 11 games with the Blues, and it was a nice one. Holy jumpin', it was nice....

Duke/UNC Timelapse Has All Of The Action, None Of The Dickie V
From warm-ups to lights out, an enterprising UNC fan captured the entire ACC regular season decider at 3 frames per second. Ants! They look like little ants! Except for Kyle Singler; he looks like a smug, punchable ant....

Short White Guy Makes His Case For The NCAA Dunk Contest
Jacob Tucker, a senior guard for the (DIII) Illinois College Blueboys, is 5'11" and can jump really high. He's put together a highlight reel and Facebook group arguing he's worthy of inclusion in next month's college slam dunk contest. That's moxie, kid....

Watch Coach K Throw A Chair
It was senior day at Cameron Indoor Stadium last night, and the Blue Devils honored their three seniors with a 70-59 win over Clemson. But the first half didn't go exactly as Coach K foresaw it, and he attempted to inspire and/or terrify his players by throwing a folding chair during a timeout. In...

Jazz Trade Deron Williams: What The Hell Is Going On In Utah?
Al Iannazzone of the Bergen Record reports that the Utah Jazz have agreed to send two-time All-Star point guard Deron Williams to the New Jersey Nets in exchange for Devin Harris, Derrick Favors and two first-round draft picks. Wow....

"Dear Pathetic, Ignorant Twats": The Duke/UNC War Of Words Heats Up
It's an annual tradition for the editors of the Duke Chronicle and the Daily Tar Heel to exchange trash talk letters in advance of their schools' first matchup of the season. We got them both, and boy, do the young minds of Tobacco Road have a way with words....