bo Page 527 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Hey Look, It's The Sad Cocktail Grenades You Always Wanted
Evidently these have been around for a while, but they're new to me. BuzzBallz: Regret In a Can. BuzzBallz: Liquid Cold-Sore. BuzzBallz: Convex Around the Sides, Like Your Abdomen When Fluid Accumulates In Your Peritoneal Cavity as a Result of the Liver Cirrhosis You Get From Living the Kind of L...
Morris Claiborne Stormed Out Of Cowboys Practice After Being Demoted
The Cowboys' disappointment with 2012 sixth overall pick Morris Claiborne reached a head yesterday, when the cornerback skipped practice and angrily left the team's training facility after being informed that he was losing his spot in the starting lineup....
NFLers Cannot Figure Out How To Use Tablets
Beginning last year, NFL teams started using Microsoft Surface tablets for things like their playbooks, medical records, and concussion testing. This year, the program expanded to include things like replay on the sideline. And now, the WSJ has a very predictable yet still quite funny story about ev...
Floyd Mayweather Claims That His Reality Show Is Completely Fake
Boxer and serial woman-beater Floyd Mayweather appeared before the Nevada State Athletic Commission today to answer questions about a brutal sparring session that Mayweather facilitated on a recent episode of his Showtime reality series. Mayweather defended himself against the commission's questions...
This Three-Woman Cycling Wreck Is Absolutely Horrifying
So, this crash, from yesterday's Elite Women's Team Time Trial, is one nasty-ass crash....
Suspended Jameis Winston Tries To Dress For Clemson Game Anyway
Jameis Winston, who is suspended for tonight's game against Clemson due to a "continuing investigation," tried to dress anyway—engaging in warmups in full uniform. Florida State head coach Jimbo Fisher had to send Winston back to the locker room to so the Heisman Trophy winner could remove his unifo...
Moritz Stoppelkamp Scores Longest Ever Bundesliga Goal
Down 0-1 to Bundesliga newcomers SC Paderborn 07 in second half stoppage time, Hannover 96 keeper Ron-Robert Zieler went forward for a last ditch free kick. That proved to be an unfortunate decision, as Paderborn midfielder Moritz Stoppelkamp cleared the ball 83 meters into Zieler's net. Stoppelka...
ESPN Reports, Then Unreports, That Casino Gave Rice Tape To The NFL
So ... this is very strange....
Derek Jeter Ass-Eating Gossip We Really Want To Be True
Today, a tipster sent us a bit of gossip about Derek Jeter's sex life that comes from what he claims to be a very reliable source. This gossip is likely no more true than similar stories we've come across in the past, but we really, really want it to be true. ...
How I Let Go Of My NFL Career
Excerpted from the new epilogue to Slow Getting Up: A Story of NFL Survival from the Bottom of the Pile, now available in paperback. We published an adaptation from the book last year....
Cheerlessly, Asian Games Begin
The Olympic-style Asian Games open today in Incheon, South Korea, providing a flag-spangled stage on which to celebrate the universal sport of politics. North Korea has reestablished its dominance in this arena by first deploying, then withdrawing, their newest weapon—feminine charm....
What Should A Commissioner Be?
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Email Drew here....
BC Coach Steve Addazio's Vine Account Is A Wonderful Relic
Boston College head football coach Steve Addazio hasn't uploaded anything to his Vine account in over a year. That is very sad, because before abandoning the medium, Addazio spent one fateful day in June of 2013 creating some of the best Vines I have ever seen....
Boner Dog Is Feeling Super Conflicted About His Giant Dog Boner
Sure, in one sense, this boner dog is from back in 2013. But, in another, larger, truer sense, this boner dog is a timeless boner dog. Look at those sad eyes. It's a heavy burden, this enormous dog boner. Who will help me bear this dog boner? Can't even get any work done in my office chair....
Reggie Bush Admits To "Harshly" Disciplining His 1-Year-Old Daughter [Update]
Lions running back Reggie Bush was a guest on the Boomer and Carton radio show yesterday, and he shared some extremely bad thoughts about Adrian Peterson and corporal punishment....
Jameis Winston To Sit One Half For Yelling "Fuck Her Right In The Pussy"
Florida State quarterback Jameis Winston will sit out the first half of the Seminoles' game against Clemson Saturday as punishment for yelling "Fuck her right in the pussy" on a table in the middle of campus Tuesday....
Goalkeeper Threatens To Sue Fans Who Peed In His Water Bottle
Alright, soccer hooligans. You guys win. The title of craziest fans is officially yours, because a few Swiss supporters apparently managed to commandeer an opposing goal keeper's water bottle, urinate in it, and then watch as he started drinking it....
Papelboned: Dong Grab Earns Phillies Closer Seven-Game Ban
MLB announced tonight that Jonathan Papelbon will be suspended seven games for grabbing his penis toward booing Phillies fans, which is a sentence I consider it a privilege to have been able to write....