bo Page 838 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Coming Soon: Jonathan Papelbon's Dubious Taste In Cinema
"Dark Side of the Locker Room" is a compendium of journalists' bizarre, amusing and previously undocumented encounters with athletes (and often athletes' genitalia). Got a story? Send it to [email protected]....

Red Sox Underwear For Sale, If You're Into That Sort Of Thing
Tired of collecting all kinds of shit related to your favorite player? Time to collect their literal shit, in skidmark form. Game-used underwear, people. Christ....

The Death Of The Workhorse Back. Jamboroo, Week 7
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Magic And Isiah's Friendship Is Not So Friendly Anymore
Magic Johnson and Larry Bird have "co-written" a new book about their lives in the NBA that, among other things, paints a not very flattering portrait of their sometime rival Isiah Thomas. With friends like these, who needs Bill Simmons?...

Who's The Boss? Bon Jovi And Springsteen Vie For NJ's Heart
With news that Bon Jovi are set to play the first concert at the new Meadowlands Stadium, we're forced to ask: where's Bruce?...

The One Where Lee Corso Takes A Massive Dump
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another....

This Man Did Too Much Blow But Still Passed Out While Eating
Football season is upon us, which means that thousands of angry, horny, feisty pretend fans will converge upon this great nation's red cup-littered parking lots to participate in traditional tailgating revelry. These are not those stories...

The Filipino Ron Artest Suspended One Year For Slugging Fan
Wynne "Tiny" Arboleda of the Philippine Basketball Association has been suspended for the entire 2009-10 season after he went all Daniel Plainview on a fan during a game. At least he'll have more time to work on his rap album....

Tim Tebow Messiah Watch: Transfiguration Edition
With apologies to Slate, the Tim Tebow Messiah Watch is our occasional look at the growing body of evidence — quotes, signs and wonders, excessively fawning prose — that the Florida quarterback is the Lamb of God....

Yep. That Guy Is Unconscious
In case you missed it, here is super middleweight Jermain Taylor getting knocked the eff out with 15 seconds left in his fight against Arthur Abraham on Saturday. WHY ARE YOU EVEN COUNTING? Get the man some help! [BSO/ESPN]...

You Don't Mess With Montana's Communications Students
Following an order from the coach to his team to stop talking to their reporters, Montana's student newspaper struck back in a beautifully catty way: they started covering the Grizzlies' opponents....

David Wells Isn't Ashamed Of His Bodily Functions
If I told you one of TBS' studio crew farted live on the air, then proudly admitted it to his viewing audience, would it have taken you long to guess which one?...

George Foreman III Needs To Be Made Clearer On This Whole Groupie Thing
The newly pro "Monk" Foreman has reportedly struck up some kind of relationship with British singer/ogre Amy Winehouse. This can only end in heartbreak. STDs and heartbreak. [The Sun]...

Mike Tyson Says It Was A Pleasure To Have Known, Bitten Evander Holyfield
Oprah gave Mike Tyson a chance to apologize to Evander Holyfield for real today. Tyson passed. He does more dancing in these 30 seconds than he did in his entire career. What a champion! [Oprah]...

Jerry Jones Thinks Wade Phillips Can Totally Beat The Patriots This Year
"Two years ago the Giants were in trouble," Jones said. "It was also absolutely expected that something was going to happen with the coach....Well, that same year they won the Super Bowl....This is a long, long journey." [DMN]...

These Announcers Aren’t Drunk Enough. Jamboroo, Week 6
Drew Magary's Thursday Afternoon NFL Dick Joke Jamboroo runs every Thursday during the NFL season. Find more of his stuff at his Twitter feed....

Your Food/Finance/Heavy Construction Metaphor Of The Day
"[W]hen a team gets on a postseason roll, it usually produces a steamroller effect. Sometimes the roll goes stale, but if you get a fast bite after it leaves the oven, it still tastes good and pays dividends." [NYDailyNews.com]...

Oprah To Host Tyson-Holyfield III
Mike Tyson is heading back to Oprah Winfrey's show on Friday and he's bringing his old dinner companion, Evander Holyfield. What could those two possibly have to talk about? [CBSNews]...

Chris Bosh Now Owns The Internet
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....