br Page 920 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The NCAA Won't Be Lied To (Or, Why To Avoid Deion Sanders)
Oklahoma State wide receiver Dez Byrant has been suspended for an entire year, not for breaking rules, but for lying about not breaking rules. Because misleading an NCAA investigator is the worst crime a human can commit....

Danny Snyder Doesn't Like Your Heartfelt Signage
Dan Steinberg found this in a trash can outside FedEx Field, where pretty much every form of human expression has been banned. It's clear: Dan Snyder is just a moustache and a pogrom or two short of being Joseph Stalin....

Improper Stitching Costs Cross Country Team A Title
There are dumb rule violations and then there are dumb rules being violated, and I'm not sure if I've heard of any regulation stupider than the one that cost a Baltimore high school a county cross country championship....

NFL Dementia Study Is Not Exactly "Scientific"
The NFL would like everyone to just calm down about all the brain-melting that they help create every Sunday, at least until they can finish their own personal scientific study that will be totally fair and not at all biased....

Brad Childress Is The Ugliest Dame You’ll Ever See
Fucking Brad Childress. Only this prick would decline an offsides penalty on first down to take a seven-yard gain. Or dress like a woman on the flight to Pittsburgh to motivate his team. Wait, what?...

Brooke Hundley Gets The Lewinsky Treatment
"The biggest reason this is in the news," CBSSports.com's Gregg Doyel said on CNN yesterday, apropos the Steve Phillips saga, "is because she's not real good looking." She isn't? I hadn't heard. People are usually so delicate about such things....

Cedric Benson Wins The Weekend
In sports, everybody is a winner-some people just win better than others. Like Cedric Benson, who won the weekend by making the Chicago Bears look foolish. Granted, he's not the first....

Sam Bradford Reminds You To Not Stay In School, Kids
Cautionary tale Sam Bradford will end his college career with season-ending shoulder surgery and a ticket to the NFL combine. That's the last time he takes career advice from Billy Sims. [NYTimes/MorningNews]...

Like A Kid Out There
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap....

Steve Phillips Fired By ESPN (Updated)
Just days after being outed for having an affair with a younger co-worker, Baseball Tonight analyst and former-Met GM Steve Phillips has been fired by ESPN....

What's The Deal With The City Of Cleveland And Staph Infections?
Kelly Pavlik, the WBO, WBC and The Ring (I love Naomi Watts) middleweight champion, said that he nearly died from an allergic reaction to a medication prescribed to treat a staph infection....

Another Long Night In The Brett Myers Household
In case you missed it, one more special gem from the NLCS celebration last night—Brett Myers goes in for the smooch. Denied. [TheFightins]...

<i>New York Post</i> Continues Full Court Steve Phillips Press
Day Two of the Steve Phillips Saga and the New York Post has you covered, with more dirt, plus a primer on how to bang interns without them going psycho on you. They do it because they care....

Phillies Win 16-Team "Who Gets To Lose To The Yankees" Tournament
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Who's The Boss? Bon Jovi And Springsteen Vie For NJ's Heart
With news that Bon Jovi are set to play the first concert at the new Meadowlands Stadium, we're forced to ask: where's Bruce?...

ESPN Horndog Dossier: The Glossary And Denouement (JED DRAKE UPDATE)
We'll end this scandal-ridden ride on the back of the scorpion with a more general story about the behavior many ESPN employees past and present engage in as part of the "travel" crew. And where's there's road, there is beef....

Eric Mangini Deserves Your Scorn ... But How Much Scorn?
Rolling Stone magazine's insult comic dog Matt Taibbi recently took a break from his assault on capitalist swine like Goldman Sachs to turn his wrath on a bigger and more menacing target—Cleveland Browns coach Eric Mangini....

ESPN Horndog Dossier: Kate Lacey
Who? Exactly. Lacey, SVP of Marketing for ESPN, was a popular subject in our tips box dating back to last year. Why? Why do people despise this woman so much?...

ESPN Horndog Dossier: Erik Kuselias (UPDATED)
Who? Right. Exactly. But Mr. Kuselias, as tiny an orb as he may be in the ESPN galaxy, has solidified his reputation as "the biggest douchebag in the place," according to multiple sources. But what about that sex-harassment thing?...

ESPN: The Worldwide Leader In Sexual Depravity
On September 9, we received a tip. Subject: "S. Phillips." The contents? "Rumor winding it's way around the hallowed halls of the WWL is that Steve Phillips is getting canned tomorrow for an offense on par with Harold Reynold's misdeed."...