braves Page 19 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Chipper Jones, Your Ass Makes Women Go Crazy
A little moment of levity to break up all the dark vibes floating around would be nice, yes? Well, you can thank this woman sitting in the front row at Shithole Fenway Park watching Chipper take some hacks in the on-deck circle. Chipper is in the middle of his goodbye tour and it appears one fan w...
Random Dude Who Insists He Used To Be The Bullpen Coach Scams Braves' Alumni Weekend
The Atlanta Braves held an alumni reunion over the weekend. They played softball, they went out for drinks, they honored John Smoltz, and they got scammed by a random guy claiming to be John Sullivan, a former major leaguer who was briefly the team's bullpen coach in the early 1980s....
Poor Freddie Freeman Is Going Blind
Modern medicine has turned so many nagging baseball injuries into relics. There's Tommy John surgery and cortisone shots and Toradol. But the crafty sons of bitches who devise the cures baseball has come to love haven't yet found a way around blindness....
Livan Hernandez Showers Abuse On Rays Ballboy For Booting Grounder
There are a lot of obvious perks to being a ballboy for a big-league team: a snazzy uniform, the chance to occasionally field a ball, the close proximity to players. But yesterday, the gig turned out to be a bit of a bum deal for the poor kid stationed near the Braves' bullpen at Tropicana Field....
Major League Baseball Swings And Misses Again, Shuts Down "Atlanta Barves" T-Shirt Operation
Major League Baseball is at it again. Whether it's the stupid, tiny embedded videos they make us watch or the continued use of Tim McCarver as an analyst, the old fuddy-duddies at MLB continue to ruin fan enjoyment of its product. Now, it's silly internet meme "Atlanta Barves."...
Cubs Ballgirl Caught On Camera Writing Note Was Rejecting Fan's Request For Her Phone Number
The video you see above made its way around the internet in recent days, and had even been sent to us by a handful of tipsters. All we knew was what we saw: A ballgirl at Wrigley Field filling out a note and handing it to a ballpark attendant. Naturally, an expert (read: Cubs broadcaster Bob Brenl...
There Was An Extra Tool In Today's Braves Tool Race, And This One Got Arrested [UPDATE]
Like most ballparks, Turner Field hosts a silly race between costumed characters that represent some sponsoring interest. In the Braves' case, it's the Home Depot Tool Race. Today's Tool Race featured an extra competitor, a fan who raced in from center field and made it to the infield before being...
Brian McCann Hit A Grand Slam Off Roy Halladay, Got Bopped In The Face By A Teammate As Reward
Last night's 15-13 extra innings Braves win over the Phillies game was weird. For one, it's the second-most runs ever allowed in a game started by Roy Halladay. (The record is 17, per commenter below.) Halladay also gave up a grand slam to Atlanta's Brian McCann, the first such homer since Evan Lon...
Michael Bourn Holds Up The Game With A Bathroom Break
When you gotta go, you gotta go. For most of us, that means quietly taking a break before we resume whatever it is we were doing. For Michael Bourn, last night it meant the start of the bottom of the fourth inning in Arizona had to be delayed, since everyone noticed the Braves had taken the field ...
Fat Chipper Jones May Or May Not Be Fat, But He Reportedly "Looks Terrible"
The good news is that Chipper Jones is officially seven pounds lighter than his 2011 playing weight. Now comes the rest of the news. His knee hurts. He's hitless in eight at-bats and has missed five games this spring. A scout told Jon Heyman of CBS Sports he "looks terrible" and that he seems to be ...
Fat Chipper Jones Says He's Not Fat
Everybody's getting in on the fun of calling Chipper Jones a fat ass. Per The Sporting News, manager Fredi Gonzalez stood around the batting cages at the Braves' spring training facility this morning and puffed his cheeks to make himself look like a fat dude. When no one on the team noticed, Gonzale...
![Counterpoint: Chipper Jones Is Not Fat [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17eautbeqg0m8jpg.jpg)
Counterpoint: Chipper Jones Is Not Fat [UPDATE]
A few readers have pointed us to the Twitter account of David O'Brien, who covers the Braves for the Atlanta Journal-Constitution. O'Brien disputes the notion that Chipper's being a heavy presence at spring training. Yesterday, O'Brien tweeted the above photo to make his case, saying it was taken j...
Chipper Jones Is Fat
Larry Wayne Jones is going to be 40 in April, and he's about to begin his 19th season with the Braves. Jones says 2012 won't be his last in baseball, but it will be the final year of his guaranteed contract, for which he's scheduled to be paid $14 million. Jones made the NL All-Star team last year, ...
The Atlanta Braves Wish You A Merry Christmas By Performing The Worst Rendition Of "Jingle Bells" Imaginable
Kris Medlen (the puffy-cheeked one with the bent brim) is the only one who gives it any effort, and he's followed by Chipper Jones's smug sunburnt visage. Ugh. Merry Christmas....
Atlanta Braves Reliever Burns Nickelback On Twitter And Nickelback Fires Back
Peter Moylan is a reliever for the Atlanta Braves, apparently. I follow the greatest franchise in the history of sports, so you know, he's not really on my radar. Anyway, this Moylan guy must have gotten back from a Foo Fighters concert and decided Nickelback needed a kick in the ass. The tweet rea...
Rob Gronkowski's Porn Star Ladyfriend Says She Humped Dan Uggla And Assorted Married Athletes
Bibi Jones, noted buddy of Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski, and star of such acclaimed flicks as The Crib and Babysitters 2, appeared on the Toucher and Rich Show today to tell her tales....
Dan Uggla Celebrated His Home Run Last Night By Dong-Bumping David Ross (Video)
Uggla had just hit a two-run homer off Cole Hamels in the bottom of the third to put the Braves ahead, 3-1. There was a playoff spot riding on this game, of course, so there was reason to be excited. But ... what was that?...
SprtsCntr: The Collapses Were Epic, And So Were the Clichés
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....
And Your MLB Wild-Card Teams Are The St. Louis Cardinals And The Tampa Bay Rays
The Cardinals beat the Astros 8-0 behind Chris Carpenter's complete game two-hitter. Sounds simple. But the rest wasn't. They'd have to wait a while to get all all celebratory in the locker room....
SprtsCntr: The Wild-Card Races Tie It All Together
What is ESPN prattling on about right now? We condense your morning SportsCenter to its essence....