burn Page 36 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
"They Won't Magically Turn You Into A Lustful Cockmonster": Chris Kluwe Explains Gay Marriage To The Politician Who Is Offended By An NFL Player Supporting It
Baltimore Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo has spoken out in favor of a Maryland ballot initiative that would legalize gay marriage. Yahoo has published a letter that Maryland state delegate Emmett C. Burns Jr. wrote last week to Ravens owner Steve Bisciotti, urging him to "inhibit such expressi...
Art Modell, 1925-2012: Grifter, Traitor, Model NFL Owner
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Tree-Poisoner Harvey Updyke Is "Meaner Than Anyone In The World," Writes Little Girl
The trees at Auburn's Toomer's Corner: not doing so hot. "Aesthetically dead if not actually dead," the university said last week. (Still, they might be doing better than Harvey Updyke, who is living in his car in the woods as he awaits trial.) The oaks received a massive pruning earlier this month,...
Andrew Luck Made A Shitty Doodle of Lucas Oil Stadium And It Sold For $1500 On Ebay
People often bemoan the grown men who go autograph hunting, and maybe rightly so, but that's a debate for another day because there is something far, far worse. It is the guy who spends $1500 on a fucking chicken scratch sketch of a stadium drawn and signed by some rookie NFL player who hasn't even...
A.J. Pierzynski Has No Problem Calling Twins Pitcher Nick Blackburn A "Piece Of Shit" To His Face
A.J. Pierzynski is not the most popular ballplayer. This is, after all, the guy whose own manager said "If you play against A.J., you hate him. If you play with him, you hate him a little less." So should anyone really be surprised that upon scoring the tying run tonight against Minnesota, the Whi...
Everyone Relax: The Guy Burning The Kevin Durant Jersey Isn't A Thunder Fan
This Twitter photo of a man in a Braves cap setting fire to a Kevin Durant jersey is making the rounds this morning. There's all kinds of hand-wringing about Thunder fans and fake fans and bandwagoners and what do you people want, James Harden was cold and Russell Westbrook made a dumb mistake and S...
![Reports: Three Dead, Including Two Former Football Players, After Shooting At Auburn Off-Campus Party [UPDATE]](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/17pcv3x7tmdcvjpg.jpg)
Reports: Three Dead, Including Two Former Football Players, After Shooting At Auburn Off-Campus Party [UPDATE]
Details are still sketchy, but it appears a shooting took place at an Auburn University off-campus housing complex that is reportedly home to many Auburn athletes. The shooting took place at a party at the complex at some time around 9:30 p.m., according to police chief Tommy Dawson. A press confer...
Jonathan Papelbon Found Not Guilty Of Thoughtcrime
Pap’s not mad at you, AAA-callup umpire D.J. Reyburn. He’s just disappointed. Disappointed that you’re so bad at your job. You “probably need to go back to triple A.”...
Harvey Updyke, Alleged Tree Poisoner, Kicked Out Of Alabama Softball Game
Harvey Updyke, the man arrested for allegedly poisoning the sacred tree's at Auburn's Toomer's Corner, who may or may not still reside in his car in the woods, was kicked out of an SEC Softball tournament game by Alabama officials yesterday....
Today's Blackburn-Wigan Match Was Interrupted By A Chicken
Blackburn Rovers are facing relegation from the Premiership, and need a win against WIgan Athletic today to even have a chance at staying in England's top soccer division. Perhaps as a statement against absentee owners, a chicken bearing the Blackburn flag was unleashed onto the pitch early in to...
Penn State Admits Official Fired Earlier This Week Was Fired For His Role In Sandusky Investigation
In an admission that shocks absolutely no one, unnamed sources within the Penn State athletic department have confirmed that associate athletic director Mark Sherburne was fired this week for his role in the investigation of child sex abuse claims against former coach Jerry Sandusky and the adminis...
Antonio Valencia's Screwball Goal Was A Work Of Odd Beauty
A brilliant defensive performance by Blackburn Rovers was ruined when Manchester United's Antonio Valencia sliced in a strike that caught keeper Paul Robinson out of position and floated into the goal. Don't let Robinson's failure detract from the ridiculous spin Valencia put on the shot, though;...
DadBoner Unmasked: Cracking The Internet's Biggest Mystery
Last week, we chronicled our efforts to find out the comic mastermind behind the great DadBoner twitter feed, an effort that was met with resistance by certain fans of the feed and by Karl Welzein himself, not to mention his fictional wife Ann Welzein. But that didn't stop tipsters from flooding us ...
Gambling Expert Calls Action On Auburn Games "Inconsistent" With Point Shaving
Yesterday, Yahoo's Charles Robinson reported that suspended Auburn point guard Varez Ward was under federal investigation for alleged point-shaving. Robinson mentioned two games that the feds were looking into—a 56-53 loss to Arkansas on Jan. 25 and a 68-50 loss to Alabama on Feb. 7. In the Jan. 25 ...
Report: FBI Investigating Auburn Point Guard For Alleged Point-Shaving
Auburn point guard Varez Ward is under investigation by the FBI for alleged point-shaving, according to Charles Robinson at Yahoo. Ward, who was suspended by Auburn at the end of February for "violating team rules," may have conspired to rope other players into the alleged scheme, say Robinson's sou...
A.J. Burnett Will Miss 2 To 3 Months Because He Broke His Face Trying To Bunt
Burnett fractured his orbital bone when this happened on Wednesday, and he had to have surgery this morning. Best-case scenario has him out of the rotation until early May, which means Erik Bedard will likely be the Bucs' Opening Day starter. It's only been a few weeks since the trade, but it's alre...
Now A.J. Burnett Is Officially A Pirate: He Hurt Himself Bunting A Ball Off His Face
Pirates manager Clint Hurdle's affection for the bunt is such that he once had his cleanup hitter do it last season with the go-ahead run on first—and in a game in which that cleanup hitter already had two hits. Hurdle holds an annual bunting tournament in spring training, and yesterday, this is w...
A.J. Burnett's Single Greatest Contribution To The Yankees Will Live On
There's still a month before the season begins, and already the Yankees have been able to replace A.J. Burnett's value to the team. No, it's not a WAR-level replacement player. Ha! That's a good joke. I wish I'd thought of it....
This Weekend In Naked Barely-Legal Cowgirl Driving News
"Meet Taylor Burnham. When Corpus Christi cops responded to a suspicious person call early Sunday, they spotted Burnham, 18, standing in an alleyway next to a Jeep Wrangler. The teenager was naked, except for a pair of cowboy boots. After spotting cops, Burnham hopped in the Jeep and took off at ar...
It Looks Like A.J. Burnett Will Soon Take His Scowl To Pittsburgh
Jon Heyman reports that the Yankees will soon receive two non-roster players from Pittsburgh in exchange for the useless Burnett and about $20 million. It's essentially a bigger-money, surlier version of that time Matt Morris landed in Pittsburgh. [Twitter]...