car Page 356 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Boys "Have At It," And NASCAR's Hypocrisy Gets Put To The Test
They'd suspend a pitcher if he intentionally beaned a batter. They'd suspend a football or hockey player if he intentionally tried to injure an opponent. So NASCAR better suspend Carl Edwards for intentionally sending a rival flying at 190 MPH....

Acting! Wins The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like the poor unappreciated working stiffs who get paid unconscionable sums to play make believe for a living. It's about time they got some attention....

Newcastle Signs Peter Parker, Goblin Attacks Up 32%
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Academy Awards To Honor Sandra Bullock And Matt Damon For Ending Racism
Tonight's Academy Awards promise to be a delightful several hours of programming. Following in the tradition of classic cinema like Rocky, Chariots of Fire, and The Sixth Man, sports movies are once again strong contenders for major awards....

Things So Bad For Ducks, They're Cheering For Huskies Now
Oregon fans gave Brandon Roy a standing ovation before last night's game. UW's Brandon Roy. Who was decked out in purple UW gear. What's wrong with this picture?...

Tailpipe: "I Bet You'd Like A Three-Breasted Woman"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

She's Like Danica, But Good
Venezuelan Milka Duno has signed on to run a full IndyCar season. Danica really has been a trailblazer. If Duno does well, maybe she can fail in NASCAR too! [Indy Star]...

Say Goodbye To Mark McGwire Road Rage
"Driving the Mark McGwire Highway" sounds like a not-particularly-clever euphemism for a PED regimen, but St. Louisans have been doing it for a decade. Perhaps not for much longer....

Indiana Hazing Scandal Proves High School Kids Are Still Obnoxious
Carmel High School's basketball Senior Day was ruined—ruined!—by shameless tabloid reporters snooping around in the stands for salacious gossip. Oh, and the fact that three of the four seniors were kicked off the team for alleged forceable sodomy....

Tailpipe: "He Didn't Seem The Least Bit Interested In Hugging Her Curves"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

David Geffen Knows This Song Is About Him (UPDATE)
Carly Simon has apparently revealed the subject of "You're So Vain," and it's David Freaking Geffen, who is gay. (Um, "wife of a close friend"?) Better him than Cat Stevens, I guess. (UPDATE: Or not!) [The Sun, via UkraineNotWeak]...

NFL Players Care Deeply About Health Reform, At Least To The Extent That It Affects Their Love Lives
NFL players have a health-reform lobbyist, though he remains "foggy" about what they want. Players are apparently concerned with "how cash from their health reiumbursement account is split in the case of divorce." Put that on a picket sign. [CPI]...

Last Time I Took Ambien, I Had A Weird Dream About Scarlett Johansson And Axl Rose Playing Ping Pong
"On Tuesday of this week...[J]ohansson was seen playing pingpong with Rose at SPiN. "They were laughing the whole time," says a spy. "They looked like they were having fun." Woah. [NYPost]...

Exciting Development In The Abridgement Of Athletes' Rights: Blood Testing For HGH!
MLB plans to implement blood testing for HGH in the minors, and the NFL wants to start drawing blood, too, and somehow this is being framed as an exciting development instead of yet more tilting and yet another windmill....

NBC To West Coast Hockey Fans: "Kiss Our Moose!"
Ready for some fresh NBC outrage? Just wait until tomorrow, when Oregon discovers that the broadcast for USA Hockey's quarterfinal doesn't start until three hours after the actual game does. I understand hockey really comes to life on the radio....

Jim Harbaugh Knows What The Kids Like
First of all, I'm shocked to find out that they only split two years ago, instead of ten. Jim, you could probably hire them to cut the grass at Stanford Stadium before they play their set. [Twitter]...

Tailpipe: "Let's Go For The Pole Today"
We recently discovered the incredible phenomenon of NASCAR-themed romance fiction, stories filled with passion and grease and beautiful people being driven swiftly to ecstasy and Victory Lane alike. What follows is a brief selection from one such tale....

Where Is Your Quad Now?
Because no one reads the newspaper, and SportsCenter's anchors are too perky for this early in the morning, Deadspin combs the best of the broadsheets and the blogosphere to bring you everything you need to know to start your day....

Potholes Win The Weekend
In sports, everyone is a winner—some people just win better than others. Like NASCAR drivers who now know how the rest of the world lives. Except we don't get to take off work because of bad roads....

Even If You're Alone, At Least You're Not Marrying La La
La La Vazquez, the shrinking violet who whipped Mavericks fans into a racist frenzy, is making an honest man of Carmelo Anthony....