car Page 364 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cardinals Bullpen Fixes John Smoltz In Five Minutes
Two weeks ago, John Smoltz left Boston a washed up failure. Then one bullpen session with the Cardinals and suddenly he's a future Hall of Famer again. All because his teammates figured out what Boston coaches couldn't....

Why Your Team Sucks: Atlanta Falcons
Some people are fans of the Atlanta Falcons. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Atlanta Falcons. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

Today In Ill-Conceived Tie-Ins
Come to King's Dominion and ride the Intimidator 305, the world's only roller coaster named for and featuring Dale Earnhardt Sr. Watch out for sudden stops, though. [From The Marbles]...

Words That Cris Carter Shouldn't Use During Live Television
me·shug·ge·neh (m-shg-n) or me·shug·ge·ner (-nr) adj. Crazy; senseless.n. One who is crazy. [ESPN/YouTube]...

Antrel Rolle Blames Fumble On His Silky Smooth Arms
The hellish, back-breaking death march of professional football has claimed many victims, but perhaps none more tragically than Cardinals safety Antrel Rolle, who dropped a crucial preseason punt because his arms were over-moisturized. The horror.......

Why Your Team Sucks: Carolina Panthers
Some people are fans of the Carolina Panthers. But many, many more people are NOT fans of the Carolina Panthers. This 2009 Deadspin NFL team preview is for those in the latter group....

The Mayfields Take Their Crazy Feud Up A Notch
Lisa Mayfield accused her NASCAR-driving stepson of being a meth head, so Jeremy Mayfield accused his stepmom of murdering his father. On Saturday, a crazy drunk woman was found trying to break into Jeremy Mayfield's house. Guess who?...

Gina Carano Gets Pummeled By Cyborg Woman
The most popular woman in MMA received an efficient ass-kicking last evening, which, some say, is the worst thing that could happen to female mixed martial arts. You know what lady MMA needs? Kimbo. [WatchKalibRun]...

Gaming Wars Rage On, With Dueling NCAA Theft Convictions
Some athletes like the multiplayer options and upgrades that come with PC gaming. Others prefer the simplicity and cost of console gaming. But they can all agree: stealing gaming platforms from fellow students is the way to go....

An Assist For Nick Van Exel: How An NBA Scorekeeper Cooked The Books
In January 1997, the Lakers' Nick Van Exel handed out 23 assists in a 95-82 victory over Vancouver, a feat less attributable to his sharpshooting teammates than to the numbers-fudging Lakers fan working the Grizzlies' scorer's table....

And Here Comes The "Pitino Is A Baby Killer" Hysteria
Shockingly, Louisville's pro-life students are not impressed with how their coach handled the post-restaurant floor mom-banging: "Rick Pitino was willing to take his own child's life in order to cover up a cheap, tawdry affair."[ALL.org]...

Hey Buddy, Down In Fro... Oh
Got an image you'd like to see in here first thing in the morning? Send it to [email protected]. Subject: Morning crap...

What To Expect From "Hard Knocks: Cincinnati Bengals"
The Cincinnati Bengals are not quite the trainwreck they once were, but everyone is still hoping for some kind of entertainment value out of this year's edition of HBO's "Hard Knocks" docudrama. Don't get your hopes up....

Rick Pitino, Health Care Reformer
The coach's attorney says the $3,000 given to Karen Cunagin Sypher was not for an abortion but to help her buy medical insurance, furnishing America with yet another argument in favor of a single-payer model. [ESPN]...

NASCAR Fans Love Their Drivers, Love Bank Robberies
Racing fans are so dedicated to their favorite drivers that they won't even remove their easily identifiable NASCAR merchandise before committing bank robberies. There's an epidemic of high-octane felonies, but ironically, the getaway cars aren't that fast. [All Left Turns]...

Rick Pitino Is No Choir Boy
Next time a crazy-eyed blonde accuses an upstanding sports figure of some heinous acts, let's not dismiss everything out of hand. Because while Rick Pitino's not on trial, there's still the little matter of public sex and a secret abortion....

Colorado Gives Football Player A Blog, Takes It Away When He Blogs About His Libido
Colorado's athletic department recently gave Ben Burney a blog, ostensibly to provide a glimpse into the life of a college football player. Which was a fine idea until Burney provided a glimpse into the life of a college football player....

The One With Bizarro Topless Eric Snow And Other Things
We get a massive amount of tips in our inbox each week. Some are pretty interesting, but don't get published for one reason or another. (NSFW)...

St. Louisans Take Fan-On-Fan Violence To Next Level With Assault On Handicapped
A intoxicated Catholic school teacher is accused of pushing a Busch Stadium usher out of his wheelchair during a game last weekend. I'd like to say we'll be tracking this, but I don't think this story has legs. [STLtoday]...

MLB Gives Topps Dominion Over All Baseball Cards
Bud Selig's army has signed an exclusive deal with Topps, making them the official baseball card of Major League Baseball. No, this does not make your 16 Ken Griffey Jr. rookie cards valuable again....