chris Page 89 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Chris Sale Made Some People Look Very Stupid
Chris Sale pitched against the Toronto Blue Jays last night, and he struck out 11 batters in seven innings in a 3-0 win. “Struck out 11 batters” doesn’t quite describe what happened on that field, though. It’s more accurate to say that Sale demoralized 11 batters....
Chris Sale Has A Cleveland Problem
Chris Sale’s night in Cleveland on Thursday was shockingly bad by the Cy Young frontrunner’s 2017 standards, but unsurprising given what the Indians have done to Sale in his career. In an eventual 13-6 loss for the Red Sox, Sale gave up six earned runs (seven total) on seven hits and three walks. It...
Report: Chris Christie Gives Up Dream Of Being A Terrible Sports Radio Host For Now
Anyone who had hoped to one day call Chris Christie on the radio and tell him he’s a corrupt piece of shit will be sorely disappointed to learn that they’ll have to settle for tweeting at him, as the outgoing governor of New Jersey will not pursue an on-air gig at WFAN. ...
Christian Pulisic Kicks Off The Bundesliga Season Like A Superstar
Every time I worry the American soccer press (Deadspin included) is being too hyperbolic in their praise and general hype for Christian Pulisic, he goes and assuages those fears with a marvelous performance. Consider today’s Bundesliga opener, which comes amid Ousmane Dembele’s transfer saga as well...
How Barcelona's Scramble To Replace Neymar Might Send Christian Pulisic To The Stars<em></em>
It wasn’t really supposed to happen like this. French teen sensation Kylian Mbappé was slated to be this summer’s headlining transfer, with the usual suspects in Madrid, Paris, and Barcelona fighting over the right to pay one-sixth of a billion dollars for his signature. Instead, Neymar somehow went...
Chris Long Has Malcolm Jenkins's Back In Anthem Protest
On Wednesday, Michael Bennett—who sits in protest of the national anthem, and was promptly challenged by a local columnist to quit football if he wants to have political opinions—said things would be very different if it weren’t only black players protesting. “It would take a white player to really ...
Let's Check In With The Jets
The following paragraph, from the MMQB’s Tim Rohan, does not appear to be intended as irony:...
Coldplay's Chris Martin On Football: "Oooooh Reeedskinnnsssssss"
Coldplay performed at the Washington Redskins’ stadium Sunday night and put together a brief (but somehow too long) tribute song to curry favor with fans of the local team. Lead singer Chris Martin crooned this 30-second masterpiece to the cheering crowd. ...
American Justin Gatlin Rudely Spoils Usain Bolt's Final 100-Meter Race
Usurping American aggressor Justin Gatlin has vanquished the great champion Usain Bolt in Bolt’s last ever 100-meter race, at the IAAF World Track and Field Championships in London. ...
Christian Pulisic Starts His Season Off By Embarrassing Bayern Munich
America’s Wonderteen, Christian Pulisic, scored the opener of the German Super Cup for Dortmund against Bayern today, dispossessing a concerningly louche Javi Martinez and easily finishing....
We Have A Blood Feud Between Chris Archer And Orbit
The slow-simmering beef between Rays starter Chris Archer and Astros mascot Orbit has spilled over into outright violence. If you are sensitive or a child or a sensitive child, please don’t watch this....
The Chris Paul Problem Is An Analytics Problem
In broad terms, the Chris Paul Problem—there is one!—is as follows: Pretty much everybody agrees that Paul is, and has been for the past decade, one of the NBA’s best players. He made nine straight All-Star games from 2008 to 2016; he has made eight All-NBA teams and nine All-Defense teams; he is th...
U.S. Women's National Team Score Three Goals In Nine Minutes To Beat Brazil
Julie Ertz’s 89th-minute goal capped a massive late comeback for the U.S. women’s national team as they beat Brazil 4-3 in a Tournament of Nations match that saw them down 3-1 with less than ten minutes remaining....
Chris Christie Gets Razzed By Cubs Fan, Leans In For Awkward Scolding
The Chris Christie humiliation spiral continued today with the fully-inflated Violet Beauregarde-looking New Jersey governor getting right into the face of a Cubs fan at today’s Cubs-Brewers game in Milwaukee:...
Chris Froome's Next Race Will Be Against History
There hasn’t been genuine last-week intrigue about who would win any Tour de France since 2011, when Cadel Evans took the yellow jersey from Andy Schleck on the penultimate day of the race. Schleck gouged Evans and the rest of the field for minutes on Stage 18's summit finish atop the Col du Galibie...
Christopher Nolan, Please Stop Hiding Tom Hardy's Big Beautiful Lips From Us
You’re a human person with functioning eyeballs and so I don’t need to convince you that Tom Hardy has a good face featuring a pair of full, impressive lips. The lips are nice. They are the kind of lips that could easily become a piece of cultural shorthand. “That dude has Tom Hardy lips,” you might...
Failed Sports Radio Host Chris Christie Catches Foul Ball To Disgust Of Mets Fans
New Jersey Governor Chris Christie showed off his athletic side at tonight’s Cardinals-Mets game, reaching from his seat to make a left-handed catch of a foul ball off the bat of St. Louis shortstop Paul DeJong....
Go Ahead And Enjoy Christian Pulisic Tearing Shit Up In A Meaningless Game
I’m not going to tell you that Christian Pulisic’s performance in today’s Borussia Dortmund-AC Milan friendly—in which he conjured two assists, won a penalty, and eeled his way past famously big and bad Serie A defenders more times than you could count—means that the Wonderteen is primed to take the...
Josh Donaldson Loses Hold Of Bat, Hits Umpire Chris Segal In Head
Tonight’s Blue Jays-Red Sox game started with a frightening first inning for home-plate umpire Chris Segal, who was hit in the head by Josh Donaldson’s bat when the third baseman lost his grip....