e Page 6503 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Reading Deadspin? Allow A Former MLS Player To Convince You Otherwise
This morning, I sat at my breakfast table going over the news. Checking through my inbox, I saw an email from a friend: "This is going to make you furious." It contained the link to a Deadspin article: "Getting Ready for MLS? Allow Us to Convince You Otherwise."...

Brad Penny's Comeback Went About As Poorly As Possible
Let's raise a glass to Brad Penny, and, hell, all the Brad Pennys of the baseball world, those thoroughly passable starters who find the right mix of good teams, tepid consistency (or rather, consistent tepidity), and just enough semi-standout seasons to garner tens of millions of dollars over a len...

Carlo Ancelotti's Eyebrow Is The Greatest Thing Ever: A Gallery
Some may argue for Jon Hamm's jawline, Angelina Jolie's lips, or Halle Berry's cheekbones as the world's greatest facial feature but for my money, perfection incarnate is Carlo Ancelotti's left eyebrow. Its curve. Its omnipresence. It's the most interesting to happen on a human face since Cyrano de ...

Please Stop Glorifying Crummy Dive Bars
I live in Massachusetts, which is a proud but anxious state with liberal policies regarding who can get married or call his roast beef famous and very conservative rules concerning most other types of personal behavior. For example, it's a lot harder than you'd think to get a drink around here....

Ukraine Team Stages Symbolic Protest At Sochi Paralympics
Amid rumors and questions over whether Ukraine would boycott the Sochi Paralympics after Russia's occupation of Crimea, the Ukrainian Paralympic Committee decided to participate, but not without acknowledging the situation....

Yasmani Grandal: Top-Notch Video Bomber
Everything about this video bomb is perfect—the framing, Grandal's complete lack of hesitation, the timing, Seth Smith's obliviousness, the interviewer's ability to keep asking questions with a straight face—it's all so good. ...

USWNT's 43-Match Undefeated Streak Ends At The Hands Of Former Coach
The US women's soccer team lost to Sweden today, 1-0, in Portugal's Algarve Cup. It was vengeance for the Swedes on a few of levels. For one, the USWNT's streak started with a 2012 Algarve Cup victory over Sweden. Our ladies' coach way back then? Pia Sundhage, who has since left the Yanks to coach h...

When A Famed Nike Coach Tried To Steal A Race, A Track Protest Was Born
The scene was unprecedented: seven runners walking off the track hand in hand, in quiet protest against their own governing body. The women had just run the 1,500-meter race at the U.S. indoor national championships on Feb. 23 in Albuquerque. The day before, the winner of the 3,000-meter race, Gabe ...

Soccer Analyst Calls Arsenal Player "The Big Fucking German" On Live TV
Here we have Chris Lymberopoulos talkin' some soccer on Sky Sports News early this morning. At one point, he started talking about Arsenal's 6-foot-6 center back, Per Mertesacker. Turns out, Mertesacker has a pretty great nickname....

Behold The Dick-And-Balls Nilla Wafer
Reader Kevin brings us this, the Nilla Wafer shaped like a dick and balls. That sure as hell is one dick-and-balls-shaped Nilla Wafer! Man. Take it away, Kevin:...

Two Days At Sloan: How Sports Analytics Got Lost In The Fog
"You're hiding all the good numbers from me." ...

Joe Maddon Is Already Hard At Work Exploiting MLB's Replay System
The truth is, no one knows how MLB's new replay review process will shake out until every last exigency is put into play. Joe Maddon isn't going to wait. He's already planning how to take advantage of the system....

This Is How You Kill The NCAA
Originally posted at Bloomberg View....

Gerald Green Is The Gunner We Need
Suns swingman Gerald Green, who is putting the finishing touches on the best season of his career, blitzed the Oklahoma City Thunder with a career-high 41 points last night, the better part of them coming from eight made three-pointers. This topped a previous career high set just last month, when h...

Netting Falls At Bruins Game, Injuring Two
A section of the netting behind the glass at TD Garden collapsed after the Caps-Bruins game last night, striking two fans and sending them to the hospital with what were described as minor injuries....

In Dallas, They Throw Cowboys Hats Onto The Ice
Tyler Seguin's ice-girl-delighting hat trick against a demoralized Canucks team couldn't have been more Texas. Among the hats to fly was one big, black cowboy hat—briefly modeled by linesman Derek Amell:...

LeBron Shut Down By Spurs, Blames His Mask And Sleeves
LeBron James was full of excuses, or maybe explanations. After a 6-for-18 shooting night, including 0-for-3 from three in a wire-to-wire blowout loss at San Antonio, James had a lot to say about things that weren't the Spurs defense....

Want To Watch A Hawk Attack A Water Balloon In Super Slow Motion?
Of course you do!...
