el Page 2069 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Cats vs. Dogs: We Have A Winner!
So it was written, and so it was done. Corgi, winner of the Dog Conference, has narrowly defeated Cat Conference champ Tuxedo. It took blood, sweat, and thousands of votes, but now it's official: DOGS ARE BETTER. Canines are the superior pet, plain and simple. But getting here wasn't easy. [Jezebel]...

Kobe Finally Makes His Chinese Pop Debut
Just a few months ago, Kobe Bryant appeared in a Sprite commercial with Jay Chou, a Taiwanese pop singer and actor, and it was really dumb. The Black Mamba appears to have also agreed to an extended cameo in Chou's new single, "- 天地一鬥 (Tian Di Yi Dou)." We knew that Kobe was a rather unimaginative...

Derrick Mason Says Roger Goodell Is A Joke For HGH Stance
This is not going to make America's $1 Commissioner very happy: Derrick Mason, Ravens wide receiver and an NFL vet so tenured that he debuted with the Tennessee Oilers, thinks Roger Goodell is a joke....

This "He Said, She Said" Trial Involving An Ex-NL West Outfielder Is Getting Weird
Of course, we're talking about the palimony case of Olvera v. [Brian] Giles. What did you think we were talking about? Giles' ex-girlfriend is suing him for $10 million that he allegedly promised her after their breakup....

Watch Dejan Stankovic Air Out A Goal From Midfield
Inter Milan's Dejan Stankovic scored a goal just 20 seconds into a Champions League game against Schalke last night in Milan. More accurately, Stankovic fluidly picked the ball out of the air from midfield and sent it searing past Schalke goalkeeper Manuel Neuer with one touch. From fifty meters o...

Blackhawks Wing Brouwer Whiffs Badly On This Hit, Injures Shoulder
Your morning roundup for April 6, the day Netflix struck an exclusive streaming deal with the Derek Jeter of TV....

This Texas Rangers Broadcast Clip Will Someday Be Evidence In Divorce Proceedings
Fun stuff from tonight's Rangers-Mariners telecast—good, old-fashioned Texan chivalry....

<i>SI's</i> Post-Championship Cover: Recycling A Jim Nantz Pun
Earlier today, we brought you wretched flashbacks from last night, when Jim Nantz, who is usually sharpei if mastiff, deployed the oldest dog-related puns in the bark. It was an announcing boner—the shih tzu see too often on TV. The line stank like poodle the moment we heard it....

No One Is Going To Cleveland Indians Games
On Friday, Cleveland opened its season on the losing end of a slugfest with the White Sox. Not the worst opening day possible, however much air Fausto Carmona's 3-inning, 10-run performance sucked out of the building—catching stud Carlos Santana went 3 for 5 with a homer....

Cats vs. Dogs: Judgment Day Has Arrived
This is it. The day we've been waiting for. We started this war with 16 supercute kitties and 16 precious puppies. Now, brave warriors — Tiger! Pit Bull! Tabby! MUTT!!! — lie fallen on the bloodied fields. Only two critters remain: Tuxedo and Corgi. One cat. One dog. And there can only be one winner...

EA Sports' <em>NBA Elite</em> Takes The Year Off, New <em>NBA Jam</em> Coming This Fall
After the disastrous, last minute cancellation of NBA Elite 11, Electronic Arts is keeping its basketball sim video game on the bench for another year, saying that it won't ship a new entry in the NBA Live/NBA Elite franchise until… [Kotaku] ...

When European Basketball Fans Get Excited, They Light Their Stadiums On Fire
Here we were thinking VCU fans were having "riots" last week, but they're nothing compared to Panathinaikos BC fans. In this European basketball game last Thursday against Barcelona, Greek basketball fans torched their own stadium. Yes, what you see above is a basketball game — not a race riot....

Jim Nantz Predictably Overdoes It With The Dog Puns
To be fair to Worst Man Jim Nantz, we understand that a Huskies-Bulldogs final is a bit like Christmas for him. A Christmas trimmed with multiple opportunities for insufferable references to dogs and winning. And so when the buzzer sounded, Nantz dropped three dog puns in under 20 seconds. It was ...

This Year's "One Shining Moment" Includes Very Few Moments From The Title Game
Your morning roundup for April 5, the day Michael Jackson took watch over Fulham FC's stadium....

Cats vs. Dogs: Here Are Your Ferocious Final Four!
What a long, strange trip it's been! As we near the end of the road, we have just two clawing, crazy kitties and two snarling dogs left. The journey has not been without surprises and upsets. And questions! What happened to Pit Bull? Why did the mighty Tiger fall? Who among us would believe Lion wou...

Kickball Rec League Captain Sends Out Fantastically Bitchy Email To His Underperforming Team
An Atlanta-area kickball team recently suffered a demoralizing 20-0 loss. Yes, we're familiar with how serious some people are about their kickball and it's never fun to get blown out. However, if you have to play with this fun lovin' bunch of sad-sacks it's still inexcusable to go all Earl Weaver ...

Did The Clippers' PR Guy Scrub Donald Sterling's Wikipedia Page?
An eagle-eyed tipster alerts us to this revision on Donald Sterling's Wikipedia page, which scrubbed the six-part "Controversies" section but added some heartwarming notes....

Wayne Rooney Scored A Hat Trick, Swore In Celebration, Got A Two-Match Ban
Premier League justice is worse than Sheriff Goodell's....

If A Hockey Writers' Protest Emerges From Long Island, And No One Hears It...
So, as surprising as the thought might be, there is a hockey team playing its games in Nassau Veterans Memorial Coliseum, best known to you as the venue that hosted that awful concert you once had to drag your niece to. That hockey team is the 30-37-12 New York Islanders, which even has a couple spr...

Richard Dent Has Some Amazing Golf Pants
Your morning roundup for April 4, the day an orangutan threw up....