el Page 2312 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

Lima Time Returns To The States
We've had an absurd dedication around these parts with bringing you the latest developments in the career of Jose Lima. Is it his infectious ebullience on the mound? Or the fact that his wife is stacked? Hard to say. When last we heard from Lima Time, he was still whooping it up with the Kia Tigers...

Brett Favre Asks For Release From Packers, Wants To Play Elsewhere
This time it's not a text message. NFL Live's Chris Mortensen is reporting that Brett Favre has asked for his release from the Green Bay Packers. Apparently, the Packers really didn't want him darkening the Lambeau hallways anymore and are set to move ahead with Aaron Rodgers. If the Packers grant h...

The Evolution Of Jason Whitlock: Writer Unloads On "Football Night In America", But Lightens Up About Gangsta Rap
Kansas City Star/Fox Sports columnist Jason Whitlock must have inhaled a larger portion of hater-tots than his usual allotment before he sat down to write this column about NBC's revamped "Football Night In America" lineup. Whitlock, like many other media members, is skeptical of adding Patrick into...

Jelena Jankovic Gets Proactive About That Not-So-Fresh Feeling
You know, back in the days before I was married it used to take panties coming off to get me excited. Now panties going on does the trick just as well. In related news noted women's right advocate Justin Gimelstob announced that all women should play without panties on the WTA....

Charles Barkley Reluctantly Puts Me In His Fave Five
When NBC Sports asked if I'd blog portions of this year's American Century Championship celebrity golf tournament, of course I said yes. At what other event would I get a chance to interview FOUR participants of Dancing With the Stars? But gradually more details emerged, and I was not amused. The sh...

Philadelphia's Excitement For Elton Brand Begets Resourceful Fashion Design Work
This Sixer fan, also swept up in Elton Brand fever, has no time to wait for local sporting goods outlet stores to get the newest prized jersey in stock, obviously....

Take A Tour Of Figjam Palace
The palatial 4.55-acre estate you see here is golfer Phil Mickelson's home in Rancho Sante Fe, Calif — and it could all be yours. Ignore all that subprime slowdown gloom and doom — this is an absolute steal. Priced between $10,750,000 - $12,225,876, it includes a spa, two guesthouses, a putting gree...

To Watch Tonight
What to do when you just can't wait for some meat ... • Cycling: Tour de France, stage 6, Aigurande to Super-Besse, France (8 p.m., ET). I used to live in the neighboring community of Not-So-Great Besse. [Versus] • Soccer: MLS, Chivas USA at Los Angeles (11 p.m., ET). Is Beckham playing? I can't kee...

John McCain Gave up Steeler Linemen While Interrogated by Viet-Cong
In a further sign that neither candidate is going to give an inch of ground when it comes to doling out sporting bona fides in swing states, John McCain stepped up his wooing of Pittsburgh voters by discussing his affinity for their football team....

Say Hello To The Newest Olympic Sport: Scooter Jousting
I'll admit that this one has a tenuous link at best to sports, but come on; two elderly women are playing bumper cars with their mobility scooters in the middle of a supermarket, and you expect me to simply let it slide? I'm not made of stone! It goes without saying that if Versus made this a weekly...

Jean Van de Velde Qualifies for British Open
Van de Velde, who memorably choked away the 1999 British Open with a triple bogey, was one of four golfers to qualify for next week's British Open. Even better for Van de Velde, he birdied the 18th hole to qualify....

Jenn Sterger Would Not Like Erin Andrews To 'Suck It'
Venerable Florida State lady of bosom, Jenn Sterger, felt a little sideswiped by her not-so-controversial interview on THE KILLER B's" ESPN 1470 (Tampa) Radio show program two days ago, after she was quoted saying, in so many words, that she wasn't a big fan of ESPN sideline princess Erin Andrews....

In Which I Develop A Sudden Interest In Track
Our infatuation with University of California pole vaulter Allison Stokke was real at one time, but it seems so childish these days. Simply put, we're over you, Allison. We've moved on (the restraining order helped). Yes, new romance is in the air: Meet Jennifer Mueller, a freshman sprinter at USC w...

Adieu, Trent Dilfer. Adieu.
As you read this I am speeding toward sunny Lake Tahoe, cranking the Beach Boys, with a big nasty redhead at my side (wait. Am I Randy Newman?). But already there's news from there in my absence. Trent Dilfer, perhaps the worst quarterback to ever earn a Super Bowl ring as a starter, announced on We...

To Watch Tonight
What to watch with your friend, Arthur "Two Sheds" Jackson ... • Boxing: Light heavyweights, Chris Henry vs. Rubin Williams, at Houston (9 p.m., ET). Shouldn't the jock be worn inside the trunks? [ESPN2] • Cycling: Tour de France, Stage 5, Cholet to Chateauroux, France (8 p.m., ET). Why must the sea...

Are You Offended By ESPN?
That's the question posed by MarketWatch columnist Jon Friedman, who gives the WWL a thorough Bissingering based on the recent "lowbrow or boorish behavior" of some of ESPN's talent. Specifically, the incidents involving Jemele Hill, Dana Jacobson, and Bonnie Bernstein, respectively. Friedman's piec...

Mike Lowell Kills With Cell Phone Pranks
Those crafty Red Sox, you never know what they're going to be up to next....

On Vincent Gallo, Black Gallagher And Rotten.com Videos
This video has been online for about a year now, but I just saw it for the first time today. It's brutal, punishing and so uncalled for that it should come with a Tipper Gore warning. It's from 2001, when my immortal beloved Rick Ankiel was still struggling with his "control" and some minor leagu...

Yankees Radio Announcers Have Grotesque Eating Habits
Apparently, New York Yankees' radio voice John Sterling is not unfamiliar with double-dipping the occasional chip in the media dining room. But sadly his food etiquette transgressions do not end there, according to the New York Post's Page Six (it's Page Six, so you know it's true). The following ac...

Yes...
Boy, that escalated quickly. Wasn't it just last week when the sports pundits and the soundbite intelligentsia were all speculating that former Los Angeles Clipper, and free agent whale, Elton Brand, would "probably" ignore the lavish offer sheet from the Golden State Warriors because "he loves L.A....