el Page 2350 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

The Culinary Genius Of Bill Belichick
For some reason, today seems like a really, really, r-e-a-l-l-y slow sports day. Maybe it's because the NFL lineup at 1:00 is substandard. Maybe it's because Dan Shanoff is making nary a sound as he quietly crunchees the numbers to see if a three-loss team can make the BCS championship game. So t...

Elijah Dukes Blends Right Into Dominican Baseball
If you thought Elijah Dukes would sit on his laurels and be happy with a first round SHOTY victory, then you sir, are a Rays fan praying to God he doesn't do anything stupid. Your prayers haven't been answered, but are very important to us and will be answered in the order they were received....

Who Will Tony Romo Date Next?
AJ Daulerio's Cultural Oddsmaker runs every Friday. Email him to let him know what you think....

When Ya Gotta Go ...
Sometimes, the call of nature is so powerful that it cannot be overcome. We know. We've been there. You might be in an inconvenient location, but whaddya gonna do? Just ask Kansas State forward Bill Walker....

Oh, This Is Just Sad
So it's at this point in the Knicks' season where we hear the band leader say "Gentlemen, it's been a pleasure and an honor playing with you," and then, as the ship creaks and begins its slow descent into the sea, they play the final hymn of "Nearer My God to Thee." (Later Fred Jones will be found f...

The Patriots Need A Theme Song
Determined to ruin a good thing, the Boston Globe somehow decided that the Patriots need a theme song. The easy way to do this would be to search through Tom Brady's iTunes folder until something clicks (Huey Lewis and the News!), but no, the Globe is putting it up to a vote. Poems, slogans and Chri...

Theismann-Kimmel, BFF
Speaking of MNF ... We can't say our mouths were necessarily watering over a potential Jimmy Kimmel-Joe Theismann feud, but breathe easy, America: Theismann's not mad about Kimmel's crack about him on "Monday Night Football."...

Antrel Rolle Thinks He Knows What Happened To Sean Taylor
We still don't think Michael Wilbon's chat comments were in particularly good taste — and who's more experts on good taste than us? — but he's not the only one questioning whether the death of Sean Taylor was just some random break-in. Cardinals cornerback Antrel Rolle, who also went to the U and kn...

The Cavaliers Do Not Have Hand
I'll admit up front that I probably don't know what I'm talking about with this LeBron finger injury thing. The Cavaliers have a staff of trainers with many small medical items clipped to their belts and handsome framed certificates at home, and I still use Flintstones band-aids. But what the hell.....

The Patriots Aren't The Same Without Troy Brown
Today, we thank Bill Belichick for adding the one ingredient this otherwise-inspirational Patriots team has been missing: Troy Brown is back!...

The Winter Olympic Mascots Are ... Yeaagh! What The Hell? ...
Inspired by Native American tales of creatures that will claw children's eyes out if they don't behave, please welcome the new Winter Olympic mascots, Quatchi, Miga and Sumi! The Games are a mere 2 1/2 years from now, so these charming critters need to get right to work, doing, um, whatever it is th...

The Raw Joy Of The Covering The New York Knicks
We know: The life of a beat reporter is a glamorous, joyous one. Every night is like a private party in which there are unicorns and rainbows. But when you're a Knicks beat reporter, you're living the life fantastic....

Canadian PSAs Are Clearly Not Messing Around
The above public service announcement has been running during Hockey Night In Canada on CBC up north. It is definitive proof that Canadians are terrifying. Heavens to Betsy!...

Here's Sean Taylor's Past, Relevant Or No
Michael Wilbon appears to have backed down from some of his ridiculous, offensive chat comments yesterday, but the fact remains: The way many media outlets dealt with the death of Sean Taylor yesterday was questionable, to say the least....

Yep, It's Still Big News When The Celtics Lose
A big deal is being made of LeBron's efforts in Cleveland's overtime win over Boston on Tuesday; he's front and center on all of the major sports news sites this morning. Of course LeBron was instrumental in the 109-104 victory — only the Celtics' second loss of the season. But Drew Gooden was was b...

That'll Be All For The Leafs
It's the NHL Closer. We pass the mic to the kids at Orland Kurtenblog. Their NHL Closer is written by Canadians for Americans....

Perhaps It's Time To Let Eli Manning Go
OK, let's all just get together and agree on this, so we don't have to unduly pick on the guy: Eli Manning isn't any good. Like, at all. Obviously, his last name has offered him "potential" status long past the expiration date, but we think all of us, along with Eli himself, would be a lot happier i...

SHOTY First Round: Sean Salisbury Vs. Rick Ankiel
After almost a week off, the 2007 SHOTY Tournament returns with a matchup of two very different human beings....

Zero Is The Loneliest Number
Gilbert Arenas will be lost to the Washington Wizards for three months. Official reason: knee surgery. But nowhere in the Wizards' press release will you find mention of Agent Zero's real disability. No amount of rehab will cure a broken heart. He writes about the breakup with his girlfriend on his ...