el Page 2400 - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
Someone Spit In DeAngelo Hall's Face And It Wasn't Pac-Man Jones
I realize that this isn't breaking any new ground, but man, Terrell Owens is a sensitive guy. DeAngelo Hall, who engages in some friendly trash talk with Terrell Owens on the phone from time to time, did some of that same trash talking to Owens during the Cowboys/Falcons game last night. Owens spi...
Carmelo Anthony Sticks and Moves... Really, Really Far Away
Well, it was about time. Over 20 games into the NBA season, there hadn't been a single bench-clearing melee. People were about to start thinking that the NBA had gone soft. Think again, fools....
Woody Paige Fingers Terry Glenn
If you were watching Around the Horn yesterday (just kidding, I know you weren't), you might have seen Woody Paige reveal the locker-room snitch that Terrell Owens told Michael Irvin all about. Owens said in the ESPN interview that someone inside the Dallas organization made it a point to tell the...
God, The Full Monty, And You
In Western religion, most of us figure that God has already seen us naked on multiple occasions. And he ain't that impressed. Just look at Exodus 19:21 for proof: "And the Lord said unto Moses, Go down, charge the people, lest they break through unto the Lord to gaze, and many of them perish. But ...
Joel Zumaya Puts His Life In Rock's Hands
Remember in the American League Championship Series, when flamethrowing, red-eyeballed righthander Joel Zumaya was sidelined with a "right wrist and forearm inflammation?" It turned out not to matter, because the Tigers blitzed the A's in four games, but had there been some tighter games late, it co...
More Empty Rooms Discovered In The Drafty Mansion That Is Terrell Owens' Mind
It's tough being Terrell Owens. Enemies are everywhere. There are secret documents to be decoded and then left in an isolated mailbox for government agents to pick up. Then there's all the time traveling with Darren Daulton. It's a lot of work....
Joey Porter Didn't Mean To Offend You; He Just Meant To Offend The Fag
Just because his team has been a disaster this year doesn't mean that Steelers linebacker/insano Joey Porter can't still stir some shit up. Yesterday, Porter apologized for calling Kellen Winslow a "fag."...
What Good Is Having A Younger Brother If You Can't Do This?
We weren't there, but we imagine that this was pretty much every day in the Manning family backyard, circa 1985. The small, helmeted figure, crawling in a stupor after smashing into a large object ... that would be Eli, and it really would explain a lot to current New York Giants fans....
Hey, Somebody Wake Up Jordan Already
As we enter Day, what, 15? of the Where's Iverson Gonna Get Traded? countdown — we think it's a shame they can't find a way to get him to Minnesota, and we can't fathom why it makes sense to send him to Boston — we look back at yesterday's big news. Supposedly, Iverson turned down a trade to the Cha...
NBA Roundup: Sage Advice From The Files Of Ron Artest
Notes on Tuesday's games in the National Basketball Association ......
Big Ben Keeps Teaching The Kids
It was only a matter of time: Ben Roethlisberger's motorcycle mishaps are inspiring minor league promotions....
There Are No Duke Basketball Tickets Here! Now Go Away!
The politics of exclusion permeates many cities, and the sleepy hamlet of Krzyzewskiville is no exception. You've heard of Krzyzewskiville; the campus tent city set up by Duke students each winter to wait in line for basketball tickets to Cameron Indoor Stadium. But this season, residents have gon...
We're Avoiding "With Leather" Jokes, But You May Feel Free
We'd like to thank NBC Sports for using the pictured headline on their site last night, in reference to David Stern acquiescing to the demands of his players to bring back the old basketball, so we didn't have to. It's nice when global corporations do our work for us....
Always Beware When There Are Bears
The concept was a pleasant, make-the-world-a-better-place one; after the first goal scored by the Minnesota-Duluth hockey team, fans were to throw teddy bears on the ice. The bears would then be collected and given to needy children (in lieu of food, apparently). But then it all went wrong....
NBA Roundup: Philadelphia Freedom
Notes on the National Basketball Association ......
I'm Sorry, Goalie, But You Are Screwed
I missed this during yesterday's Premiership coverage, which necessitates doubling up on the amount of soccer posts this weekend. Many of you, I'm sure, hate this. And I'm sorry. But Portsmouth's Matt Taylor did something yesterday that is not normal, and I don't think we should ignore it....
Nine Ladies Dancing, Eight Bengals Shackled, Seven Swans-A-Swimming...
Desperate to up the total with the new year looming, Bengals cornerback Deltha O'Neal has become the 8th Cincinnati Bengal to be arrested this calendar year. That has to be an NFL record... and now they're just being greedy and trying to put it completely out of reach for anyone else. There are only...
It's Sleepy Football Night In America
We try to recap each weeknight game the morning after around here, because weekday games are rare and often are the talk of the "water cooler" around "the office" with one's "co-workers." Unfortunately, last night's Steelers-Browns tilt was, well, a completely shellacking that was over early and in ...
Well, It's Not That Big A Deal If You Miss This One
This, it's safe to say, is not one of those night when we're banging our head against the wall for not having the NFL Network. (We're far more concerned about missing the Rutgers bowl game.) The Steelers and the Browns, two teams long since removed from the playoff picture, go head to head tonight, ...
Buy Dontrelle Willis Some Dishware
We don't want to be known as some kind of Negative Nellie in the world of sports; we like sunshine and rainbows and all kinds of pretty things that might or might not have tails. We support nice happy stories, like anything involving the Marlins' Dontrelle Willis, whom could very well be the most ...